My girlfriend is on the pill, however she is also on antibiotics treating tonsilitis. I have heard that medication and the pill do not go well together and that a condom should be used until she goes off meds. Is this true?

Any form of antibiotics may cause the contraceptive pill to stop working and you will need to use a condom during the time she is taking the antibiotics and also for 2 weeks after she has finished them. These 2 weeks gives her body time to adjust to the pill working again.
Vomiting and diarrhoea can also cause the pill to work less effectively.
There should be an information booklet that comes with the contraceptive pill that should answer any questions you may have.

My boyfriend and I were doing 69er when I started to ride his nose forgetting he had a cold sore a fair way up his nose that was dried up and scabbed. Should I worry about contracting the herpes virus and get checked out??

Just to be safe you should see your doctor for a check up.

1. I dont orgasm from sex, only from being rubbed on my clit. What can I do to orgasm during sex?

2. My boyfriend and I have been having sex for quite a while now but I never seem to orgasm! I hate it because my boy always cums but I cant orgasm. The only thing that makes me orgasm is when he rubs my clit. When we have sex it doesnt hurt. One time I started crying during sex, like not one tear but balling my eyes, he just sat there and hugged me and I felt so bad that I cant. Is there anything we can do to give me pleasure from sex?

3. Me and my boryfriend have had sex 3 times but I have never had an orgasm is that normal? And how would he be able to give me one?

Majority of women do not reach orgasm through vaginal intercourse alone. Women take on average 20 minutes of stimulation and arousal to have an orgasm. Men take quite a bit less. Women also have more variation in what they find to be stimulating as well as having more difficulty defining exactly where and how stimulation works best. Only 20% of women are able to orgasm with intercourse alone, most women need some sort of direct clitoral stimulation.
Talk to your partner about the fact that it is unlikely for women to reach orgasm during intercourse, and then each talk about what sexual activities you do enjoy and find some middle ground. If you both do like intercourse, but you're just not reaching orgasm, you can have intercourse while using fingers to manually stimulate your clitoris. Try rubbing a small amount of Four Seasons Arouse gel directly on the clitoris. It contains special ingredients which will help towards acheiving orgasm. Have a look at all the different sex positions on our website for some variation.

I sometimes give my guy head and I love that he loves it but I hate the taste of it! Why does it taste salty and gross? And why are all men obsessed with blowing in our mouths? And am I the only girl that thinks this??

It may taste that way because he might not clean it properly. The salty taste is probably his ejaculate. His diet can affect the way his ejaculate tastes. If he eats well it shouldn't be too bad. You can try taking a shower together before hand or try using a flavoured condom.
You are certainly not the only girl out there who feels this way about giving head. Some girls absolutely hate it and will refuse doing it, while other girls may love it.
It is up to you whether you want to do it or not.

Hello. After having sex using a condom and sometimes lubricants, very often, I feel a burning sensation (like hot chilli down there) and have to go straight away to shower or else it 'burns' and annoys me. Any reason why?

You could have a latex allergy. See your doctor for confirmation.

I am a woman age 32. I have no sex reaction, I am sweating always. How will I be slim?

A healthy diet and exercise will help you to lose weight.
Many women have trouble feeling sensations during sex. You need to find out what makes you feel good. If you feel better about yourself you may enjoy sex more.

The other day I gave my boyfriend oral sex and let him cum in my mouth. I heard that swallowing it is considered sexy, so I wanted to try, but ended up retching and spitting it out on his belly. He thought it was hilarious, so I didnt feel so bad about it. Is there any way to avoid that happening again? I dont want to gross him out or be grossed out like that again.

Was it the taste that made you spit it out? Or just the shock of something being spurted into your mouth. If it is something that you want to try again it may just be something that you will get used to over time.
You could also try letting him cum in your mouth and let it run back out onto his penis and use it as a lubricant to stimulate it with your hand.

Me and my boyfriend had sex about 3 months ago, we were both virgins before each other and I was wondering if it was possible to have caught something if we both only done the basics before(head, hand, finger).
Should I consult a doctor? Thanks!

Do you have any symptoms? If you have itching or burning you may have thrush which can be helped by a cream from the doctor. If you have other symptoms such as pain, discharge etc you would be best to see a doctor. If you dont have any symptoms and are certain you are both virgins then you should be ok. It is always best to use protection for safety and peace of mind.
If you did not use a condom and you are not on any other form of contraception ie. the pill, then there is a chance you could be pregnant.
STIs/STDs can be transmitted through sharing needles, vaginal intercourse, oral sex and anal sex when done with someone who is infected.

Me and my boyfriend have been having sex for ages but often afterwards I get pains under my lungs. He is quite large down there, could that have something to do with it?

Any pain can be a sign of infection. So long as he isnt being too rough then this pain should not occur. It would be best to see a doctor to rule out infection.

Im a 23 yr old woman and I have been in my relationship for 5 months now but before I met him I had a really high sex drive and now that I am with him I dont feel like sex with him. I was just wondering is there anything I can do to make me want to have sex more or is there something wrong with me?

There are many things that could affect your sex drive, stress, boredom, repitition.
Why not try something new such as date night, sex games, share fantasies etc to spice things up. Also why not try the Four Seasons Ice Lube or Arouse gel for some extra stimulation - there are also many over the counter vitamins and herbs that may help. If it is to do with a deficiency in his 'moves' talk to him about what you like and perhaps show him.

Hi, Im a 16yr old female and started having sex a few times a week with my boyfriend, its been about 3 or 4 months now. Everytime we have sex I cant seem to get excited. Its almost as if my body doesnt want to react to what he does. We have tried different positions, foreplay and using a condom and not using one. Im not quite sure what to do because I dont want him to think he cant please me. Please help!

There could be many reasons why this is happening. Did you have a bad experience when you were younger? Sometimes this can affect intimacy later on in life.
You are not alone though, when it comes to not feeling anything during sex. Many women feel closeness and fullness, but not the intensity they believe that they 'should' be feeling. The vaginal walls contain relatively few nerve endings, making intense sexual stimulation, pleasure, and orgasm from vaginal-only penetration unlikely.
A womans sexual pleasure, and, ultimately orgasm, are much more likely to occur from sensations felt by her clitoris.
The next time you find yourself in the mood ask him to touch, rub, caress, and/or press your clitoris with his fingers. Adding a few drops of lube can add a slippery and more sensual feel.

Hi, I have a long distance relationship with my boyfriend. When we have phone sex. I sometimes bleed a bit after I cum. But it has not come from my period. Is this what you would call an issue? What can I do to prevent this? Could you please give me some methods or suggestions to improve phone sex, cause sometimes I am out of ideas to start.

Vaginal bleeding after penetration, masturbation or intercourse, can be caused by many reasons. Without the proper lubrication, friction may cause tiny tears in the vaginal tissue. It should, however, never be a lot of blood. Also, any sharp fingernails or rough patches of skin on the fingers may cause vaginal tears. Maintain health hand hygiene leaving you with smooth skin and nails. If there is a lot of blood after any kind of penetration, it could be indicative of infection and should be investigated by a doctor.
In regards to improving phone sex, try telling him what you are wearing and how it feels against your body and how you wish he was there with you to take your clothes off. Maybe try not doing it so often - maybe once or twice a week that way you have something to look forward to and may not run out of ideas.

Me and my girlfriend have sex regularly. Everytime we have finished his sperm always comes back out from my vagina, is it normal? How can I get pregnant?

If a man ejaculates into a womans vagina, without using a condom then the sperm as well as vaginal fluids will trickle out. Semen is no exception to the rule, 'what goes up, must come down'. In most cases, not all of the semen should come back out. The semen that does remain in the vagina usually carries enough swimming sperm to go for the ovum.
You can increase the likelihood of the semen staying longer in the vagina by having the female on her back and the male on top. After he has ejaculated the female can remain with her legs up or to be more comfortable she could try placing pillows under her knees to help prop up her hips.
Have a chat to a gynecologist, obstetrician or midwife for pre-pregnancy planning and suggestions to increase the likelihood of pregnancy.

Im 17 years old and my girlfriend has a rod in her arm to prevent her from getting pregnant and sometimes while we are having sex, blood comes out and I stop because I am scared she has a std or something. What can it be? Can it be because I have a 19cm penis, I get freaked out because I think Im doing that to her but she says she cant even tell that she bled and that I didnt hurt her while having sex.

It could just be excess menstrual fluid that is forced out during penetration or it could be a sign of infection. Bleeding like this should not be ignored and your girlfriend shoud go to the doctor and get this checked out.

I am a 28 year old male and am having sex with my girlfriend. We both want to have a child. How do I make her pregnant?

There are places you can go to like family planning centres where you can talk to someone about the best ways to get pregnant.
Have a search on the internet for your nearest centre.
For a lot of people having sex without any form of contraception will lead to pregnancy in the short term. If on the pill it can sometimes take a few months for the womans body to be ready for conception - men can switch to boxer shorts which are better for sperm. Normally if pregnancy hasnt occured after 1 year of trying you should follow up with a doctor for testing of both partners to see if there is a reason.

Hi, my question relates to the nature of the way a woman orgasms...I know it varies, I am a 19 year old female and over the past two years have found that I dont necessarily 'explode' like a lot of women apparently do. My boyfriend still makes me wet but its a gradual release over time. I know he makes me feel good but is the way my body reacts, normal? I think he doubts that I have actually orgasmed, even though I tell him that what he was doing was great - are his doubts justified?

Everything you have said sounds pretty normal. Women orgasm in may differetn ways as you already know and as long as you are happy and satisfied there shouldnt be any problems.
Maybe you could try experimenting with different positions or introduce some stimulating toys into the bedroom.

Hi, me and my boyfriend are 16 years old. We both did it together for the first time. We are always having sex and we tried many positions. Its very easy for him to turn me on quick but it takes me a while to turn him on. What should I do???

Try giving him a massage, rubbing up against him seductively. 'Accidently' show him some cleavage or do a sexy dance. Kissing him all over and sometimes performing oral sex without bringing him to orgasm may help.
There are other tips on the website for pleasing your partner.

I have been with my partner for 4 years now, but when we have sex he shows no emotions...he just lays there. I ask him if he enjoys it but, he says yes. But I'm not sure what to do? I want to feel more close to him when we make love, what could I do?

Suggest to your partner that you would like to try a different position. There is section on our website with pictures and descriptions of different positions. It sounds like you need to spice things up a little. Maybe dress up for him in a sexy outfit and do a sexy dance, or tell him that you want him to take control.
He may have had a previous experience or up bringing that affects his experience. Try talking to him about what he is feeling and explain to him that you need him to participate more in lovemaking.

Ive been with my boyfriend for a little over a year and we had sex for the first time a couple of days ago. His penis is a little smaller than its supposed to be. What can I do to make me feel more during sex or what can we use?

Try getting your boyfriend to make you orgasm through foreplay and then he can orgasm through penetration. Try using Four Seasons Arouse gel on your clitoris to help stimulate you. You can also try the Four Seasons Vibrating condoms. These condoms come with a vibrating ring that is placed over the penis and causes the penis to vibrate so it sort of becomes a vibrator which you will feel during penetration. You can also try different positions which will help you partner to penetrate deeper.

Hi I’m 21 and my girlfriend is 18. We have been in an intimate and loving relationship for over a year now, and we both decided to try penetrative sex. I, of course was more than interested and she was wanting to experiment as she has very little sexual experience and seldom touched herself as she said it hurt. We both had experienced very satisfying oral sex with each other and generally after an hour or so of foreplay I would attempt to ease myself inside her. Over a number of attempts I discovered despite lubricating and warming her up any more than the glans being inside her would hurt her intensely. She nearly starts crying each time I try and most recently I tried to go deeper and she screamed incredibly loud as if she was in agony. I stopped immediately, not wanting to hurt her and couldn't maintain an erection after that. She kept saying "you look so sad" and wondering why I couldn’t keep it up. I don’t want to hurt her just for the sake of sex, but I don’t want to think that I’m forcing her or that I think she is unattractive. She assures me she wants to but I’m somewhat unconvinced. I’m not that well equipped, average length of about 6 inches and I curve to the left when erect. I want to experience sex with her as both I and she are virgins but I just feel horrible that I’m hurting her or am doing it wrong. If you can advise me, she and I would really appreciate it.

The pain that your girlfriend is experiencing could be due to the fact that her hymen is still intact as she has not had penetrative sex before. The hymen is a thin membrane that stretches across a womans vaginal opening and will stretch open during a womans first penetrative sexual experience. This can be painful for some women. However if the pain is that bad for her, a visit to the doctor may be required to see if her hymen is too thick to be penetrated naturally and may require intervention.

Hi Im a 15 year old girl turing 16. I dont know what to do cause I get horney sometimes that I start to finger myself what can I do to stop Im soooo ashamed of myself...is there anything wrong with me? please help.

There is nothing wrong with you. Mastubation is nothing to be ashamed about. It is a very normal healthy thing to do and a good way to learn what you like and how to be pleased.

I was wondering how I could report my boss for forcing me to have oral and anal sex with him without losing my job! I'm so very desperate for him to stop hurting me.

This is called 'sexual harrassment' and even 'Rape'. You need to stop this immediately by talking to his supervisor. The company who employs you has an obligation to provide a safe working environment. Make sure you document any discussions you have either in writing or keep a log of discussions and also times you were harrassed by this man. Check out the website www.lawlink.nsw.gov.au for more info. Dont let this continue, it is up to you to take action now.

Im 20, Ive had sex twice and both times my man has achieved an orgasm but I haven't and I wanted to know if your clitoris could become desensitised. If so what can I do about it?

There are 2 different ways a woman can orgasm - through clitoral stimulation and through penetration. There is a large majority of women who are only able to orgasm through clitoral stimulation. You need to find out what makes you feel good. Maybe your boyfriend needs to spend more time stimulating you and bring you close to orgasm before he penetrates you.
Sexual enjoyment does come over time.
Try Four Seasons Arouse gel. Just rub a small amount on your clitoris and the special ingredients will help you experience greater stimulation.

If you have had sex, that day your partner ejaculated on your body and then wiped it off his penis, and then had a quickie an hour later are you pregnant?

If kept warm at body temperature (like on the skin) sperm remain motile for several hours. Sperm are very sensitive to tempertaure and moisture and will eventually die outside the body, but since each ejaculate may contain as many as 750 million sperm, and it only takes one sperm to result in pregnancy, precautions are essential. Ejaculation anywhere near the vagina without condom use, may result in pregnancy or STIs. Pre cum contains sperm, so even though the male ejaculated outside of the vagina there is still a chance of falling pregnant from the pre cum.

My boyfriend and I are having a long-distance relationship. We usually cant hold to do a phone sex. When I am about to cum, I am not sure whether it is just a cum from my vagina or added by my urine. And when I pee after I masturbate, at times I feel like it is not flowing well, but it doesn't hurt. If we masturbate all the time, may it lead to lack of cumming much? Thanks.

Masturbation is a very normal, healthy thing to do. It doesn't matter if you do it 3 times a day or 3 times a month, doing it a lot will not hurt you.
Some women do actually ejaculate so the liquid you have may be ejaculate. Make sure you are well lubricated when masturbating to avoid getting a urinary tract infection. Varying your masturbation technique and sensation will help you to avoid issues with orgasm when with a partner.

Im 16 years old and me and my boyfriend dont really have sex because he lives in Philly and I live in Springfield. To get him in the mood what should I do?

If over the phone, try phone sex. Describe to him how you are pleasuring yourself and ask him what he would like you to do. Talk in a soft sexy voice. In person, you can give him a massage, do a striptease or just kiss and nibble his ears, neck or shoulders.

Me and my boyfriend are both 16 and sexually active. Except when we have sex, I am always on top and don't get as much pleasure out of it as I would like to. He never gets tired so he keeps going, but he never cums. What can I do to make it more pleasurable for the both of us?

Sounds like you need to try a different position as the woman on top may be less sensitive for you. Try missionary or doggy style.
Have a look on our website under the 'Sex Education' tab for plenty of ideas. Maybe spend a little more time on foreplay to see if that helps him cum a bit quicker

Hi. I'm just curious about herpies. I believe you can only get infected once the symptoms come up. I read on your std test that the symptoms can appear at any time which is why best wear a condom. Does a condom protect completely from herpies (or other infections). Can it spread from outside the vaginal or penis area? Are most diseases spread just from discharge itself? I'm just curious as it is a little scary the thought of catching stds, especially if I don't know that much about it.

It is great that you are aware of STD's and are taking the time to research and understand the risks.
Your best protection against STI's/STD's is to always use a condom including during oral sex as herpes can be transmitted from a cold sore to the genital area and visa versa.
If you haven't already, take a look on our website on the 'sex stuff' tab under sexual health and click on the STI/STD Info tab. We have listed all the different types of STD's and STI's - their symptoms and treatments.

Hi, my boyfriend and I have sex regularly but he always asks me whether I've cum...I'm not so sure how it feels although I have reached extreme heights. How would I know if I have finished and if I said no, would it offend him?

Every woman experiences an orgasm differently. For some it is literally an explosion that is very intense and then a release down.
For some it is more a sensation. It is actually hard to tell you if you have had an orgasm or not. What about when you masturbate, have you been able to get to a higher place then?
Rather than concentrating on whether or not you have cum, try to explain to your boyfriend that you felt great and loved what he did - unless of course you didn't and then perhaps you could guide him to do more.

What age do I have to be to buy condoms?

There is no recommended age for buying condoms. It is just up to the discretion of the shop keeper. Try buying them from a large supermarket to avoid any issues or embarrassment.

Hi, Im a male 17 and have a 7 inch penis. Sometimes when me and my girlfriend have sex it seems to hurt her a fair bit. We have sex all the time but it seems im the only one enjoying it. Is there any solutions that may make her enjoy it the way I do? Whats the best way and position to give a woman an orgasm?

Pain during sex can commonly be caused by dryness. Try lots of foreplay and using some Four Seasons lubricant to make things move a bit easier. If this doesnt help and the pain continues, your girlfriend should consult her doctor to rule out an infection.
Have a look on our website at the animated sex positions. This will give you a few ideas you can try. Doggy style is a good position for pleasing the female as you can stimulate her clitoris while penetrating from behind. Sometimes the woman feels more in control on top so this might suit her better.

I need some advice. Im always really horny and get very wet but I can only see my boyfriend about once a month. I find myself getting so desperate that I think about sex buddies or meeting up with my ex just to have sex. Self pleasure doesnt work for me - I can't seem to orgasm if I do it myself. Whats wrong with me and how can I get less horny or learn to orgasm myself?

Are you committed to your boyfriend or are you having these other thoughts because you feel the relationship is over. How would he feel if you slept with someone else.If you are committed to your boyfriend and he is not open to you having another partner then you really need to get sleeping with someone else out of your head.
Maybe you should invest in a vibrator or try some Four Seasons Arouse gel, it contains an ingredient which when it is applied to the clitoris it promotes blood flow to the area which may increase stimulation to help you achieve orgasm.

When me and my girlfriend have sex and she has an intense orgasm she often feels sick in the stomach and sometimes throws up. She says her mother gets it too. Have you heard of this before or is there any remedies to stop it? Or do I just make her sick!

Your girlfriend may have had a negative sexual experience that has left a psychological scar in her mind. She may also have an association between a sexual act and another condition. Keep in mind this is not a diagnosis. If your girlfriend is worried she should see her doctor.
Orgasms vary from woman to woman and so does the body's reaction.
There may be several reasons for this reaction-
*Previous negative sexual experience
*Guilt
*Family trait
If there is any pain associated with the vomiting she should really see a doctor.

Okay well, my boyfriend and I have been having sex, but the thing I'm worried about is that he doesn't pleasure me before sex, as in like finger me, or anything. I'll be honest the penis goes in fine, like not too painful but what can I do to make him know that I want some pleasure before having sex? He has never gone down on me, but I don't mind that because Im not sure I want that, although I have had it done before. But its a comfort issue.
Could this mean he thinks my vaginal region is not attractive? what can I do? Please help.

I don't think this has anything to do with your vagina being unattractive. There could be a few reasons why your boyfriend doesn't pleasure you before sex.
Do you pleasure him before sex?
Maybe he is inexperienced and has no idea what to do. In this case you should guide him through what you like.
Maybe before sex you can whisper to him 'I would really like it if you....' Or show him what you want in a little "show"
You need to talk to your boyfriend and find out what the issue is and talk about foreplay and how important it is in love making.

My boyfriend and myself lost our virginity together. And on our first time I wasnt sure if he came. If he didn't cum was that a bad thing?
The last time we had sex he did cum, but it took so long. The time he took didn't bother me much, cause I'm an active person, but is there anything I can do to make him cum easier?

Is your boyfriend able to orgasm when he masturbates? If so, how long does it take?
When you masturbate you are in control and do only what feels best, when you are with a partner the sensations are different and perhaps less intense and things may take a little longer to get going.
Your boyfriend needs to get to know what makes him feel good. Try some different positions and maybe some more lubricant. If nothing works and this is worrying him, he should conuslt his doctor.

Lately when my husband and I have sex, it is fine until he puts a condom on and some lube. Then it can hurt at times, like there is friction. Could I have a reaction to the lube or condoms? If not why does this happen? We have changed brands with the condoms and lube but that didn't help. I dont understand why it happens?

It may be an allergy. Do you have itching etc? Why not try putting some lube onto yourself when not having sex and see if there is a reaction. Perhaps you could do the same with a condom on a different day.
If there is a reaction then you will know it is an allergy and you should stop using immediatley, if not perhaps see a doctor for a diagnosis - you may have an infection.

How effective are condoms in preventing Aids and STI? I have noted that when having sex with the woman on top position. Vaginal fluids flow out and soaks the man's balls down to the bed. Surely this can transmit STI and aids virus because of the fluids.
Can you please highlight on this issue.

Blood born viruses such as HIV and Hepatitis can only be transmitted by blood to blood contact so unless you had an open sore the chances of contracting these diseases is minimal

Is being penetrated into my pee hole bad? My boyfriend is asking me if I want to try it but Im not sure.

Insertion of any object into the urethra, for men or woman, can be dangerous if not done properly. Women have much shorter urethras than men, 1-1.5 inches long (2.5-4cm), and urinary tract infections are more likely.
I suggest educationg yourself first and really think about whether you want to do this or not. Dont let your boyfriend force you into something you dont want to do.

Hey, I'm 42 and my 12 year old boy was wondering how old it is recommended to be before you consider sex?

Whilst it varies from state to state, the most common age of consent for hetrosexual sex in Australia is 16 and homosexual sex is 18. There is no "recommended" age to consider sex as everybody matures at different rates and each individual needs to decide for themselves when they are ready not only to have sex but also to deal with any possible consequences such as pregnancy or infection.
It is great that you and your son are open to discussing sex. Being open about contraception and protection against diseases and also being able to discuss respecting and pleasing your partner will go a long way to preparing him for when the time comes.

My girl and I have been talking about sex for a while and I have been wondering if most girls shave, wax etc?

Everybody is different and it is up to the girl whether she shaves, waxes, trims etc.
It is very popular at the moment to minimise hair in the pubic region and the chances are your girlfriend would have hair at least "trimmed up" down there.
The anticipation will be just like opening a present at Christmas so be patient and you may get a nice surprise.

Before I fell pregnant I loved sex every night, now that I'm 5 months pregnant I don't enjoy sex with my boyfriend anymore and it feels like a chore when we do it. Is this normal and will I get my sex drive back?

Many different women find that symptoms such as fatigue, nausea, breast tenderness, and the increased need to urinate make sex too bothersome, especially during the first trimester. Generally, fatigue and nausea subside during the second trimester, and some women find that their desire for sex increases. Also, some women find that freedom from worries about contraception, combined with a renewed sense of closeness with their partner, makes sex more fulfilling. Desire generally subsides again during the third trimester as the uterus grows even larger and the reality of what's about to happen sets in.
You and your partner need to keep the lines of communication open regarding your sexual relationship. Talk about other ways to satisfy your need for intimacy, such as kissing, caressing, and holding each other. You also may need to experiment with other positions for sex to find those that are the most comfortable.

I have asked my girlfriend if she can feel anything when I play with her clitoris and she says no. Is there such a thing as an insensitive clitoris? Or am I just missing the spot? Please answer this as I am desperate to please my girlfriend!

It is great that you are taking the time to consider your girlfriends feelings and satisfactions in the bedroom. And that you are communicating with her to find out what feels good and what doesn't. First of all you need to make sure that it is the clitoris that you are playing with. The clitoris can be found at the top of the genitals, above the urethra and below the pelvic bone and hairline. It is a hooded body part. Some men call it "Little man in a boat" as there are some similarities when looked at from above.
The clitoris is a very special part of a womans body, with the sole purpose of providing pleasure. However, every woman's body is unique and responds differently. Some women have pleasurable sensations when their clitoris is touched, kissed, rubbed, sucked and pressed. Other women experience pleasure over time as a result of cultivating their clitoris through masturbation, either alone or with a partner. Yet there are also women who find that direct stimulation of the clitoris is uncomfortable. Try using the Four Seasons Arouse gel or a natural lubricant which helps stimulation of the clitoris.
Perhaps your girlfriend needs to get to know her vagina better by gradually becoming more familiar with what turns her on in order to be able to enjoy the experience.
The other thing to think about is what IS happening when you are with your girlfriend, rather than what ISN'T happening. Are you both feeling pleasure, valuing being together, each feeling cherished and special? Perhaps these are the things to focus on, not the orgasmic response. Men tend to measure their success as lovers based upon the strength, kind, and number of orgasms they produce in their partners. How about redefining sexuality in terms of pleasure? It may even expand your own.

I am a 19 year old girl, my boyfriend is almost 21. He was a virgin before me, I was forced to have sexual intercourse when I was about 12 years old but I classed myself as a virgin before my boyfriend. We have sex on a regular basis (though it is not that great for me), I like to use a little lubricant to make entry more pleasurable, whenever my boyfriend is on top I cant orgasm, nor when he does doggy which is his favourite. If I am on top and find a good spot it is better but I have to keep stopping otherwise he will finish and I wont reach full orgasm. I want to keep going but he likes to change the condom and by this time he has gone soft and only wants to go to sleep. Only once in the 18 months we have been together has he got hard again and then he just makes me get on top and he just lays there. I feel like he is just a dildo (which sucks for me!). How can I make him in the mood for more? How can I climax quicker? When ever he uses his fingers it only makes me dry .. please help.

There are a lot of issues to deal with here so I will take them one at a time.
It is very sad to think that at 12 years old you were forced (raped) into your first sexual experience which is not only traumatic/devastating at the time but also affects your future relationships. I really hope that you received counselling to help you to deal with what happened.
Your boyfriend sounds a little on the selfish side and he should be more concerned with ensuring that the sexual experience is satisfying for both him and you. If you are not being sufficiently aroused during foreplay or are not fully relaxed and into it, using a personal lubricant would be recommended to help with penetration. Your boyfriend needs to learn how to pleasure you during foreplay and perhaps spend more time on foreplay so that you have orgasmed or are close to orgasming before penetration.
Different positions can be easier for a woman to experience orgasm than others. As the majority of women orgasm from clitoral stimulation, positions such as doggy style which give no clitoral stimulation are not ideal for reaching orgasm unless the man is manually stimulating her with his fingers. Positions such as the woman on top, give good clitoral stimulation and many women find it easier to orgasm whilst on top.
Your boyfriend is quite right to want to change the condoms after he orgasms and has gone limp as the risk to damaging the condom or it slipping off is quite high. Sometimes, with the woman on top it can be easier for the man to control his orgasm, perhaps instead of stopping, you could keep it slow until you are ready to orgasm and then speed it up. Also, if you lower yourself towards him you may get better stimulation and may orgasm more quickly.
When your partner uses his fingers, some lube on the end will help alleviate the dryness you are feeling and will provide a different feeling for you. Perhaps also try the Four Seasons Ice Lubricant or the Four Seasons Arouse Gel, these products help promote blood flow and may assist you to acheive a better orgasm.
You need to communicate with your partner so that you can both achieve a fuller experience.

Me and my girlfriend have sex regularly but she has always said that her vagina is burning, when I penetrate her vagina she says to remove my penis as it burns. What is her problem? We never use condoms.

Firstly, this is not just her problem as sexual intercourse should give both partners pleasure and you should be concerned about ensuring she has a great experience also.
Do you use a water based personal lubricant such as from the Four Seasons range. This could merely be that she is not lubricated enough during foreplay or simply vaginal dryness. Try a personal lube first if you haven't already and see if that helps.
If not, she may have an infection and needs to see the doctor. As you are not using condoms for protection, if she does have an infection, you may need treatment also.

Hello. I am 15 turning 16 in a few weeks. I would like to know which one to go on, the pill or the bar? Would it be more effective if I did both? Is there a way I can get either without parental consent? Mum says no to it cos it will be like saying "there you go you can have sex whenever". But I am not having sex, just a really irregular period!!

You really need to discuss with your doctor the benefits of the pill or the bar and which would be better for you. You most certainly should not do both as this will totally overload your body with unnecessary chemicals.
You need to see a doctor to get a prescription for the pill or bar but there is no legal age to do this without parental consent as long as the doctor believes that you are able to make an informed choice and have a full understanding of the choice you are making.
The pill is generally more expensive than the bar and you need to remember to take the pill everyday at the same time. Both have side effects and one may be more suitable for you now to just regulate your periods and would need to be reviewed if it is still the best option for you as a contraceptive. Remember that when you decide to have sex, you need protection from STIs as well and you will not get this from the pill or bar.
Hopefully, you will also feel that you are able to discuss your choice with your mum at some point.

I am 6 weeks pregnant, is it safe to use your personal lubricant during pregnancy?

To the best of our knowledge, there is no known agent in the lubricants we make to suggest harm during pregnancy, we don't see any reason for not using lubricant while pregnant.

I can't get my boyfriend to cum when I give him oral. We are both pretty inexperienced. What are some good tips on giving oral sex?

You can find some good tips for oral sex towards the bottom of this page.

On your product Arouse for women it says not to use if you have herpes. Is this just when you have an outbreak or all the time and if so why?

One of the ingredients contained in Arouse - L-Arginine may agravate the symptoms of genital hepes.

I am a 17 year old girl and I am in a long term relationship. Me and my boyfriend (who is my first sexual partner) have been having sex for about 4 months. My boyfriend usually comes really quickly and I never get the chance to have an orgasm, although when we do have sex and he lasts, it seems to hurt me. I am confused and upset as I thought sex would be more enjoyable than it actually is. I just really want to enjoy the satisfaction of an orgasm. Is this normal?

We are bombarded with romantic images from tv, music videos and magazines and the reality for a lot of people is that sexual enjoyment comes over time and is a learned response. If two sexually inexperienced people come together there is a big learning curve to get to the point where both partners are satisfied.
Foreplay and lubrication will be your greatest friends here. If your body is expecting discomfort and/or pain then it will not respond with enough lubrication and you may then experience the pain you described if he lasts longer as your vagina becomes dryer. Make sure you and the condom are well lubricated before penetration.
As far as cuming too quickly and you being left unsatisfied, why is the sex over once he finishes? He may be able to get another erection in about 10-20 minutes and could be stimulating you during this time before he is ready again for penetration. Or he could bring you close to orgasm before he penetrates the first time.
Try different positions to enhance your pleasure, such as being on top. Make sure he spends time on caressing your breasts, clitoral stimulation with his fingers or tongue etc. Don't give up, with time and patience I am sure sex will become much more pleasurable.

I am 18 and was going down on my girlfriend and I put 1 finger inside her vagina and then she told me to stop because her whole body went numb and then she freaked out. That has never happened before, is that normal? And what happened to her? Was it a massive orgasm?

It may very well have been an orgasm that caused this reaction or more likely was caused by her forgetting to breath and hyperventilating. In the future, she should concentrate on keeping her breathing under control and trying to stay calm if it happens again.

I had bulimia nearly a year ago and my period is nearly back to normal, when can I start a family with my fiance?

Having your period is a good sign that you are ovulating again and therefore pregnancy may be possible. Every woman is different and so is their ability to fall pregnant. Take extra special care of yourself and your nutritional needs and once you are ready to try and conceive give it a go naturally and see what happens. If pregnancy is elusive in the first 6-12 months then you may need to see your doctor for some tests.
Once you are pregnant, it is very important for your sake and the sake of your baby that you do not fall back into the bulimia as your body changes. Make sure you are honest with your obstetrician, partner and yourself to ensure the best possible outcome.

I am a 21yr old female and I don't have a period due to my birth control. I am not a virgin. My boyfriend is well endowed and every time we have sex I bleed! It also burns after sex and can hurt during penetration! What should I do to make this more enjoyable and less messy?

Are you lubricated enough? Make sure you are well aroused and have used extra lubricant before penetration as this may explain the burning (friction) and pain. As you are not having a regular period you may be experiencing breakthrough bleeding/spotting which could be a result of the thrusting and shouldn't be a cause for concern.
If you take things slower and use more lubricant and the burning and pain do not go away or get worse, or the bleeding increases see you doctor to rule out an infection.

I am female and I've had thrush before and I used a cream for it. I used it for a week and it seemed to disappear. I am in a relationship so I gave my boyfriend the cream as well, but I don't know if he used it because a couple of days later I had sex with him and the feelings and the symptoms of thrush came back. It has been a couple of months now and I haven't been to the doctor but I have this white stuff inside my vagina but it doesn't seem to be discharge because it is not coming out on my undies. I occasionally get the itching sensations inside my vagina and around the opening, is this thrush or do you think I am just imagining it?

Your symptoms seem to indicate that you still have a mild case of thrush. Perhaps speak to your pharmacist to see what is the best option for you as there are tablets as well as creams available.
Thrush is not an STI and for men to catch it from a woman is quite rare but can happen - does he have any symptoms such as itching, redness or discharge?? If so, he should receive treatment also.
To prevent thrush you should avoid using soap products to wash your pubic area, try a non-perfumed soap free alternative. Avoid wearing tight trousers and synthetic underwear.
If you continue to have recurring bouts of thrush or your symptoms don't go away with the tratment see you doctor.

After me and my boyfriend have sex or in the middle of sex, my vagina starts to burn and really hurt me. My boyfriend can't use lube because then I don't get to orgasm. Is there something wrong with me or is it normal? After sex I always need to pee and even that still burns.

Sex shouldn't hurt like that and for your own sake you need to determine why you experience such pain.
I would suggest that the first thing you try is lubricant as the burning sounds like it may be from friction. Most women orgasm from clitoral stimulation and so long as you don't use too much lubricant it shouldnt stop you from having an orgasm. Perhaps make sure your boyfriend spends a lot of time on your pleasure and perhaps with manual clitoral stimulation, brings you to orgasm before he enters you.
It may take time for the abrasions to heal so if you still feel pain after a week or so then you may need to see a doctor for a diagnosis. You may have an infection such as an STD, pelvic inflamation or a urinary tract infection. But sometimes this sort of pain can be a sign of a more serious condition and should not be ignored.

Me and my partner had sex for the first time unprotected. We did this whilst I had a period and used the withdrawal method. Can semen get a female pregnant?

Yes semen carries sperm and will certainly make a female pregnant if all the conditions are right. The withdrawal method has the highest failure rate of all contraceptions as pre-cum can be expelled prior to ejaculation and may contain sperm.
Having sex during a period is also no guarantee that pregnancy wont occur as all women have different cycles, especially at different ages. Whilst a period may be flushing out any unfertilized egg in the uterus another egg may have already started its journey from the ovaries. Sperm can also survive up to 5 days in the vagina so it could be waiting for an egg to make its way down.
If you are not concerned about STDs but definately do not want to fall pregnant you really need to use some form of contraception such as Four Seasons Condoms.

I am a 23 year old virgin. I'm in a relationship for 5 years. I have no sexual experience before. My boyfriend asked me to have sex with him. He suggested wearing a condom and he promised me he wouldn't cum in my vagina. I would love to have sex with him but I am afraid of getting pregnant and other side affects. How can I have safe sex? What are the side affects of first sex?

Your boyfriend sounds like a caring, patient and understanding man. He obviously cares about you and is wanting to keep you safe. The first question is "Are you ready to have sex?" If the answer is yes then you can move on to the next steps. If you are not ready, then you need to communicate this with him and work on any issues and reasons you have together.
NO contraception (ie pill or condoms) is 100% effective. Four Seasons Condoms give you the best protection against pregnancy and STDs. In the unlikely event that the condom breaks, you should see your doctor as soon as you can (within 72 hours) and discuss options such as the morning after pill.
In regards to protection from STDs you need to be certain that you and your partner are in a monogamous relationship (ie neither of you are having sexual contact with other people). If you are monogamous, then perhaps both of you went to the doctor to have blood tests to determine that you are both STD free then this would ease your mind.
There are no major side affects from first tim consentual sex. Psychological issues arise if 1 or both partners are not ready or willing to participate freely, ie religious beliefs, fear etc. The physical side affects can be minor pain/discomfort and/or bleeding on breaking the hymen. You can minimize this by making sure you are well lubricated from foreplay first and perhaps by using Four Seasons Personal Lubricant as well. Take your time and listen to your body and heart. There are also some more detailed answers on first time sex in some of the other questions on this website.

I was wondering if there is anything I can do to enjoy sex, I think I have a low sex drive? Please help me I really want to enjoy it.

There seems to be 2 issues here. One is a low sex drive, where you don’t feel like having sex or don’t really even think about. Quite often you can enjoy sex once you are having it but the urge is not there to initiate it. If this is the case, then mark a date on a calendar and follow through. Do things leading up to it to make yourself feel sexy, such as a bubble bath, sexy lingerie, clean sheets, soft lights and music.
The other issue is not enjoying sex when you are having it. This then creates negative feelings and anxiety which will push your sex drive down so you don’t have to deal with it.
If this is the case then you really need to communicate with your partner. Lots of foreplay to create intimacy, such as brushing your leg against his when sitting next to each other, a casual stroke of his arm just to ignite a little spark of excitement and anticipation. Make yourself feel sexy with scents and touches.
Again, communicate that you cant wait to get him alone, perhaps suggest what you would like to do to him or even have him do to you. More foreplay, perhaps you could give each other a massage with the Four Seasons Massage Oil, he could concentrate on your nipples, buttocks and inner thighs (remember oil is not for use with condoms).
Then he could try gently massaging and rubbing your clitoris with a stimulating product such as the Four Season Arouse Gel or Four Seasons Ice Lubricant. Guide him here as to what you like and what you want. He may even be able to bring you to orgasm here before penetration.
Make sure you use more lubricant on the penis and around the vaginal entry before penetration if required, as women get older they can produce less natural lubrication and may require additional assistance.
Try different positions that offer more clitoral stimulation such as the woman being on top which can help bring a woman to orgasm.
Hope these tips help, in this day and age we are all so busy we have to make an effort to keep the sparks ignited as there are so many other pressures on our time. Your relationships are very important and are worth a little bit of extra attention.

In saying all that, there can also be medical or psychological reasons for a low sex drive or for not enjoying sex. If you try some of the suggestions above and are still not happy, then seek help from a doctor as there are plenty of things they will be able to suggest for you.

I got the contraceptive implant a month ago. I have had prolonged, but light, bleeding ever since and my doctor gave me eostrogen to stop the bleeding. The bleeding hasn't stopped and it's a week later. I want to stick this out until at least three months is up for my body to get used to it, but what are the chances of the bleeding stopping?

A common side effect of the contraceptive implant is irregular bleeding that usually settles within 3 months. Any medications can affect people differently and may have an adjustment period. If after the 3 month 'adjustment' period, you are still bleeding you will really need to decide with your doctor if continuing is best for you.

I want to have sex whole day and night, will my vagina get injured?

You will probably need extra lubrication as your body may not produce enough which could cause friction resulting in burns or abrasions.
Depending on how hard the thrusting is, you may end up with some muscle soreness.
Just listen to your body and respect it.

Im 26yr old female and I orgasm within a few seconds...I love foreplay but when we have sex I just take 15-30 seconds and then I was done. My husband takes longer and he always knows that Im done in between. He doesnt have any problems with that but I feel so bad that I cant enjoy the whole process with him. Though I am a very romantic, horny kind of person but why cant we finish at the same time.

Your husband is probably happy that he turns you on so much and this would also excite him.
Why not try making sure you concentrate on pushing him closer to orgasm during foreplay before he enters you. Normally, women orgasm from clitoral stimulation, so why not try a position with less clitoral stimulation such as "doggy style" where he enters your vagina from behind whilst you are on all fours.

Our timing sucks with wanting to be intimate with each other and we have a child. What can we do about this?

This is the life of a parent!! When your children are quite young you can take advantage of those times when the children are asleep to be intimate, remembering that mothers can sometimes get caught up with all the other things that need doing once the kids are asleep, so make a date, help her out and help her to relax first, dont just ambush her when she finally slips into bed.
Once the kids are older and dont go to bed as early, you will need to be a bit more creative. Maybe they could sleep at a relative or friends place or you could go away for the weekend. Most importantly, teach your kids from early on that when your bedroom door is shut, you are not to be interrupted.

I think I am having a sex addict problem. I dont ever want to get off my husband, sometimes when he is sleeping, to wake him up I start rubbing him, I cant hug him without starting to get all turned on. Do I have a problem?

It may just be that you have a high sex drive. If your husband is happy with the situation and you are both fulfilled then there is really no issue.
If it is an issue in your relationship then you may be headed for trouble as sex addicts quite often engage in risky behaviours such as affairs, unsafe sex, one night stands etc. which still gains them little or no sexual satisfaction. In this case you should seek assistance from a professional.

I have been with my boyfriend for some time and we enjoy sex regularly although he will not go down on me. I have asked him why and he says it is because of me bleeding down there. How can I get him to relax and go down on me.

Everyone has their own preferences and you may never convince him to try and you will need to respect his decision. Don't give up just yet though, why not try using a Four Seasons Latex Dam which is a thin layer of latex that is placed over the vaginal area, having this barrier may ease him into pleasuring you orally and when he sees how much pleasure he is giving you he may come around to going all the way.

My boyfriend and I always have sex and he has a large penis. I get very wet during sex and he slips out. I use tissues to wipe my vagina as he prefers me dry, but I find that it is painful if I am not wet.

Women vary in terms of the amount of vaginal secretions produced during sexual arousal. Unfortunately, there is no way to control the amount of fluid that your vagina naturally secretes when you are aroused.
You really need to have some lubrication during penetration or the friction (especially from a large penis) will cause burning, abrasions or even tearing. The key here is balance - perhaps you could wipe some of your natural lubrication before penetration but not all of it. Perhaps your partner needs to move in and out more slowly or in a more controlled way so that he doesn't slip out.
Sex should not be painful for you and you need to communicate this to him so that you can both acheive sexual fulfillment.

Ever since I started being sexually active my vagina started to smell.. Im really embarrassed. I dont like to have sex all the time unless Ive had a shower. I love sex and would love to do it whenever I wanted it. I have to have 3 showers a day, it's pretty bad. What can I do to stop it from smelling? I dont have an STD, Ive been checked! HELP!

All vaginas vary in smell depending on the stage of your menstrual cycle.
Over washing the vagina can cause a PH imbalance especially if you are using a soap based product. Try one of the specialty feminine washes available and even a feminine deodorant or powder. Try to limit the wearing of pantyhose and wear cotton instead of synthetic underwear. Perhaps try panty shields and keeping your pubic hair short.

When my boyfriend performed oral sex on me for the first time, it was great, but the second time he did it, he said it did not taste right - almost sour and pungent, what happened? I showered before hand. Could the fact that I just started taking birth control for excessive bleeding 3 days before he did it? And how long should we wait after my period for him to perform oral on me?

Vaginal tastes will vary from woman to woman and on the time of their cycle. What you eat can affect the tastes of your vaginal fluids for example raw garlic, multi vitamins, asparagus and pineapples. Also, as you have just started taking the contraceptive pill this could also affect your taste.
Try using a Four Seasons Ultra thin Dental Dam - this is a thin latex sheet held over the vagina during oral sex and will give you the sensation without giving him the taste.
As far as how long to wait after you period for him to perform oral sex on you - this is a personal preference as some people continue oral sex during a period.

I had sex for the first time a few nights ago. I'm 19 going on 20 in a matter of weeks. I'm worried about accidental pregnancy. The first time we had sex his condom size was too small. We didn't use it and we had sex but he got out before he knew he would come. Even though he came out side of me there's a chance he might have precomed. Is that chance great? The first day I felt all sorts of emotions. Is it normal to feel dizzy and hungry as if you haven't eaten in ages after having sex? The second time we had sex he bought a box of condoms. Everything went well but the morning after I felt dizzy and starving like a bear. We have only done it twice and my center feels strange as I sleep, stand or walk. Is it normal to have brown liquid coming out and feel that way?

You should see a doctor as soon as possible to check for pregnancy and infection. The symptoms you have described are unusual and should be checked out - they may be nothing but it is best to see a doctor.

I am a religious girl who is 16 years old and I am not allowed to have any sexual contact until marriage. At times I find myself being really horny and often put objects in my mouth such as carrots and cucumbers and aerosol cans and also find myself using olive oil for stimulation in my vagina and anal hole. Is this doing any damage to me? What else can I do to relieve my sexual frustrations?

I am not sure if you are inserting these items into your vagina or anus and would suggest that if you are that you make sure they are clean with no sharp edges and would even suggest a condom on the carrots and cucumbers to avoid transfer of bacteria.
We would also caution about the use of olive oil inside the vagina and anus. Whilst some people swear by the effects of massaging olive oil onto the outside of the vagina and lips to improve suppleness, there are no real studies about whether olive oil inside can cause infections or bacteria to thrive. We would recommend the use of Four Seasons Water Based Lubricants.
As a religious girl, you may not be comfortable purchasing condoms or lubricant so you may need to learn some additional masturbation techniques - obviously a dildo would be great for you if you are open to that. If not try massaging your clitoris to bring on orgasm. You could use the olive oil here if there are no other choices.
Another popular form of masturbation that may help you is using a stream of water, whether from a hand held shower head or by lying under the flow from the tap.

My boyfriend and I are extremely sexually active and Ive noticed that his penis does not fit as tight as it used to. I do clenching exercises but I was wondering what other exercises you can do to tighten your vaginal muscles.

Vaginas come in all shapes and sizes and are designed to stretch to allow a baby to pass through. Like all muscles the vaginal muscles can be contracted and stretched to keep strong and healthy. As clenching the muscles and pelvic floor is tricky, you may want to insert a finger inside the vagina and then clench to ensure you are clenching the correct muscles.
Once stretched it us very difficult for the muscles to spring back to the size they were before. Your body has adjusted to your boyfriend to create a perfect fit. It is also good to remember that the vaginal wall engorges with blood during arousal and this will help with feeling tighter.
If you are still not happy, there are some products on the market that can help stimulate the pelvic floor muscles. Search the net under 'pelvic floor exercises'.

I have been with my boyfriend for nearly 2 and a half years and before we lived together we had sex 3 times a day, now we live together it has dropped to only once a week. He is six years older than me, I am 21. I am worried that he cant keep up with my needs and it is putting a strain on our relationship. I have tried getting him to take pills but he still never seems to be interested - please help, I need it more than once a week.

When you live together and see each other all the time and are coping with the stresses of work, kids, money etc your sexual relationship can often get pushed to the side as other priorities take over.
You will need to communicate and work on your relationship together and have realistic ideas about what is required for both of you - compromise from both of you will be needed.
The last thing you want to do is push him to have sex to the point that it becomes a chore. Try and find out what is affecting his desire for sex - is it stress? - try giving him a body massage with candles and soft music without the expectation that it will definately lead to sex - that is a bonus.
If it is purely the physical release you need (not the intimacy) you can always try masturbating. You never know he may even like to watch.
If you are truly committed to each other, and this continues to be an issue, you should both talk to your doctor about what options and treatments you have.

My boyfriend and I share a very uniquie sexual relationship - when we are having sex I like it hard and rough and like him to talk dirty to me by calling me names and pulling my hair. After I cum I always feel like I have done something wrong, is it normal to want such an explicit sexual experience?

If both you and your partner are agreeable, then there is nothing wrong with what you are doing, so long as neither of you find it demeaming or hate doing it.
I would also hope that if this behaviour stems from any form of abuse (sexual, verbal or physical) in your past, that you do take necessary steps with a professional to help overcome it.
Having said all that, we all find different things stimulating and you should not feel guitly about your sexual preferences, fantasies and role playing. Just remember to keep this in the bedroom as you do need to be treated with all due respect outside of the bedroom.

My husband is always concerned that I dont want to have sex anymore - is this normal and why dont I get as wet anymore?

On average a couple that has been together for a few years will probably have sex once a week. Some would say "if they were lucky" as some couples can go weeks inbetween and some couples will have sex more often. It is not all that common for two people to come together that have the same sex drive.
When you are coping with the stresses of work, kids, money etc your sexual relationship can often get pushed to the side as other priorities take over. You will both need to work on this together and compromise on what you both need. Perhaps try date night - (if you have kids someone can look after them for a few hours or the whole night if you are lucky) perhaps your husband can cook you dinner (and clean up afterwards) or take you out for dinner, you can wear something sexy and just focus on the two of you. No talking about work, kids, worries.
You dont have an on/off switch so you do need to stimulate your senses into action. Touch, smell, taste, sight, hearing. Put some music on, turn down the lights, burn some scented candles, touch and taste each other.
It is hard to do this every night, but maybe once evey two weeks or so will be enough to get you in the mood more often. You will both need to make a conscious effort to make your relationship a priority.
As a woman gets older her body changes and so can the amount of natural lubricant she produces. This is quite common and can be overcome by using a water based lubricant such as the Four Seasons range. If it becomes a big issue for you and your husband, go and see your doctor for advice and options.

My boyfriend and I have just had sex for the second time and a few days later my vagina got really itchy, could this be an allergy to condoms?

As discussed before the most common symptoms for a latex allergy are -
Itchy, red, watery eyes
Sneezing or runny nose
Coughing
Rash or hives
Chest tightness and shortness of breath.

The most common causes of vaginal itching is a yeast infection such as thrush which can occur due to a reaction to detergents, perfumes, synthetic underwear or due to the changes after having intercourse for the first time. You can visit the chemist and get their advice on trying a Thrush cream/medication, if this does not help then you will need to see a doctor.

VAGINAL BLEEDING

We have received a few questions about vaginal bleeding after sex. Unless you are about to get or have just finished your period then vaginal bleeding after sex is not normal and needs to be investigated by a medical professional. If you have perhaps had a small tear or abrasion, you may have some stinging and perhaps bright red blood but not a lot and not ongoing.
Vaginal bleeding can also be a sign of an STI, infection or something more serious. Whilst you may feel frightened or embarrassed to see your doctor, for your own health, dont put it off.

You said to keep pool and spa water separate from sex. My girlfriend and I are quite adventurous and are considering having sex in the sea. We'd use a condom naturally, but does salt water provide any negative effects?

One of the reasons we recommend not having sex in water, if you need to wear a condom for protection, is that any type of water washes away you natural or applied lubricant which causes additional friction. This friction can weaken the condom and cause breakage.
This friction can also cause small abrasions which can leave you more vulnerable to infection.

My partner often complains that my vagina isnt wet enough and we go through heaps of lubricants. Are there any medications or creams to help make me naturally wetter?

Some medications that you are already taking may impact your natural lubrication as may your age and genetics. Applying a lubricant is going to be your best bet in the short term.
If you are going through menopause, speak to your doctor about whether hormone replacement is an option for you.
If it is really effecting your love life, you can speak to your doctor about Vaginal Estrogen Therapy which come in creams, rings or tablets that are inserted into the vagina.

Is it normal for a girl to leak the cum back out of the vagina after sex?

This is quite normal if a condom has not been used. Once the girl stood up, gravity would take over and the liquid would start to come out. She should keep some tissues handy.

How old can you be in QLD to buy the pill on your own?

The age of consent in Queensland is 16 years old. The contraceptive pill is not only prescribed to prevent pregnancy but can also be prescribed for other issues such as heavy periods. You need to have a talk to your local GP and see what criteria you need to meet to get the pill.

When I give head to my boyfriend he gets really into it and starts holding my head and pushing down on it really hard, I almost choke. When I stop he whacks his penis into my head and says dirty stuff, I dont know whether to laugh or cry as it hurts when he does it. What should I say to him to make him stop and just let me do it.

Any relationship is about mutual respect. You need to explain to your boyfriend that you do not enjoy this part of you relationship and that he is hurting you physically and emotionally by being so aggressive. If you are into it, perhaps you could tie his hands so he cant push your head down and and he can learn to give up some control to the pleasure.
Ultimately, you do not have to do anything you dont want to do and if he loves you he will also respect you.

I need some advice. Being a girl who likes to play things safe, I always like to use a condom. Guys just laugh if you say you wont go down on them unless they use a condom. I am concerned about catching an STI or something. What is a guys general view about using condoms in this case. Is it something guys dont like and should I feel silly about saying I will only go down on them with a condom. Also are there any risks of catching something in oral sex high.

You are holding all the power here so use it to your best benefit. Most guys would prefer the sensation of not using a condom and would think that the chances of transmitting a disease would be low. However, STIs can be transmitted during oral sex without a condom. If infected with HIV, then the HIV virus can be transmitted in the semen although the risk is lower than vaginal or anal sex. The Herpes virus and gonorrhoea can also be transmitted during oral sex without a condom and as they are often asymptomatic, its hard to tell if you or your partner has an infection.
This is your life and your choice and if you are not in a monogamous or long term relationship you should be protecting yourself. If in any doubt, always use a condom.

I used to enjoy sex before I fell pregnant to my previous boyfriend and I have been a single mother for 2 years now. My boyfriend and I had sex the other day and I didnt enjoy it at all. Is there something wrong with me?

After you have a baby, your body can go through many changes and you may need to relearn what you like and what you find stimulating. Having a baby can also affect your natural lubrication, so try some Four Seasons Water Based Lubricant, perhaps even the ice variety. You have also experienced many emotional issues which can have an impact on your enjoyment of sex also. Thinking about the kids, housework etc can all distract you from the pleasure at hand, so try to block everything else out.
All partners are different as well and you may need to communicate with your boyfriend about what you like and what feels good. Perhaps he is not as experienced at pleasing a woman and you can guide and direct him.

I am a 25 year old female and when I first hit puberty I started to have yellow vaginal discharges. When I was 19 I fell pregnant and a test showed I had thrush - I had no symptoms. The doctor checked me and saw that I had white stuff inside my vagina and to go to the chemist to get thrush tablets - I never went. I still have the yellowish discharge that smells musky - Is this normal?

All vaginas have some smells. Some can be musky and others are not. For normal vaginal health, the outside lips need to be washed thoroughly daily - normal soap can alter the ph level of the vagina so perhaps try a special intimate feminine wash. Try to avoid nylon underwear and stockings - cotton is best.
Normally the symptoms of thrush include the discharge, itchiness and soreness. If you do indeed have thrush then you need to have treatment. Speak to the pharmacist first to see what options you have if it is thrush and what the risks are if you use the treatments and it is not actually thrush. If this doensnt work, you really need to see a doctor, possibly a gynocologist, for an accurate diagnosis and treatment. You will need to ensure that you follow the recommended treatment perscribed.

I dont like the squishy sound that you get after I cum. I think it is gross and it distracts me from pleasing my boyfriend. He loves it because he says it gives him an indication on how horny I am. Is there any way (besides verbal appreciation and scratching) that I can show him Im turned on without focussing on the sounds?

Just the passion and enthusiasm you show during foreplay and sex will give him an indication of how turned on you are. Perhaps play some music to hide the noises or keep a small towel handy that you could use to wipe yourself. Every body - its look, taste and sounds - are different so try to relax and accept this about yourself.

I have a problem. I have sex regularly with my girlfriend and she says it feels great and fantastic and it looks as if she is climaxing (moaning, shaking legs etc) and she just suddenly stops her hard breathing, and relaxes, but she says she doesnt know if she orgasmed. If I continue to thrust it sometimes hurts her and on occasion she says that the feeling inside her gets so overpowering, not painful, that she needs me to stop. What is this? Am I making my girlfriend orgasm, or what is going on?

Firstly, it is great that you care so much about your girlfriends sexual experience. It is very difficult to answer as a climax can be a very different experience for different women.
Some women report a sensation of tingling in the spine, brain, and genital areas. They may feel waves of contractions and heat/cold. While some women can experience being on the verge of passing out or exploding, for others their experience is somewhat less than that of 'earth moving'. Sometimes a womans body will go completely rigid during orgasm and they may have muscle contractions not just in the pelvic regions. Some women also have the overpowering sensations you described where to continue to have sex boarders on painful and unpleasant.
It sounds as if she is experiencing her form of orgasm and if she is feeling satisfied and fulfilled then that is all that matters. Continue to be sensitive, caring and a considerate lover.

How do you give a hand job?

TIPS TO PLEASURE HIM
Using your fingertips, stroke up and down the shaft of his penis gently.
As his tension builds, use more and more of your hand ie. your palm and increase pressure slightly, depending on hardness.
Encircle his penis with your fingers and move up and down the shaft, when you reach the head of his penis use your palm to roll around the head of his penis applying pressure as required.
As with any sexual contact, you need to reduce the risk of transmitting STIs by using a condom. You can use saliva or water based lubricant to make it slippery and sensual for him.

My boyfriend and I had sex and after he ejaculated he took off the condom and wiped off his penis with a tissue, still in the mood, we started rubbing each others genitals just for fun. There was no penetration but is there a way that there could still be some sperm that could have possibly survived and can get me pregnant?

Sperm can survive outside of the body for no more than about an hour. In general, if the semen is still wet it may well have live sperm.
Seminal fluid dries out very quickly when its outside the body and once its dried, the sperm die almost at once. How quickly it dries depends a lot on what the surface is. On a human hand, the drying/survival time would be very short.
Its very unlikely that you could get pregnant this way.

Im a female and I was wondering if there is anyway of stopping the farting noise when having sex?

It is completely normal for air to sometimes find its way into the vagina during intercourse - and many couples will have heard the sound which it occasionally makes, usually after the male withdraws.
There really isnt anyway around it. Maybe try some different positions. Check out the animated positions on our website for some ideas.

I'm silent when having sex, my boyfriend told me to breath because I used to hold my breath but still now that I breath I still dont make noise and I want to because he doesn't like that I'm silent. I can't make fake sounds though because it doesn't sound real. Help, is there anyway to make me noise naturally?

Everyone is different, some are vocal and some are not. The only way you will ever feel comfortable being vocal is to practise. Try some heavy breathing, then panting, soft moaning and see how you go. Try to vocalise what you feel inside, it may even heighten the whole experience for you.

1. I am 15 (male) and have attempted masturbation a number of times, but am never successful in having an orgasm, am I doing something wrong?

2. I am a 17yr old female and I still haven't orgasmed. My boyfriend says it's because I tell myself I won't orgasm but could it be the way he pleases me? I can get a good feeling for a little while but can't keep it and once it's gone I can't be bothered having sex. Even masturbating doesn't work? What could I do? What could he do to make me orgasm?

Both men and women can have difficulty reaching orgasm, although it's more common among women. For many people, becoming orgasmic takes practice. Masturbation helps people figure out what feels good and what helps them build tension toward orgasm.
Your thought patterns can influence your concentration. If you think "I'll never do this", or "I have work to do", this can work against you.
People masturbate in different ways to heighten the level of sexual arousal. Some prefer using their fingers and hands, with or without lubricant. Others masturbate with sex toys, fantasy, or erotic magazine or videos. In addition, touching other body parts at the same time can add another dimension to pleasure - some enjoy stimulating their nipples, anus, neck, arms and/or back - Try using Four Seasons Arouse or Four Seasons Ice Lubricant which can increase arousal.
If you're still unsuccessful, consider that certain medications, drugs or alcohol can interfere with orgasm. If after trying the above, orgasm still doesn't happen, you should see your health care provider.
While learning how to orgasm may take time, practice makes perfect. In the meantime, enjoy the trip.

Im a 17 year old female and I was wondering if there is anything you can eat to make his and her fluids taste good. Like for example can my boyfriend eat something so his fluids don't taste salty? And same goes for me?

The taste of bodily fluids is unique to all of us. You can experiment with your diet to see how the taste, or it's intensity changes with your food choices, if it changes at all.
While some believe that cutting out dairy products and avoiding cauliflower, broccoli and asparagus improve the taste, others believe that limiting foods that are heavily in garlic and onions would also do the trick. Smoking and drinking are also believed to affect the taste of semen. As well, some say eating parsley or cinnamon before oral sex affects the flavour of semen.
So try these things out and come to your own conclusion.

Is it possible for a girl to have her period if she is pregnant?

Many women report having their period while pregnant, but typically this is not the case. The reason why this cannot be is that pregnancy and menstruation cannot take place at the same time. If you were pregnant and you began menstruation you would inevitably lose the pregnancy, or have a miscarriage. While you cannot have your period and continue to be pregnant at the same time you can experience vaginal bleeding and continue to be pregnant. It is often this vaginal bleeding that women believe is their menstrual cycle when it is not.

I lost my virginity with my long time boyfriend, we recently broke up and I'm currently dating a very nice guy who I have had a sexual encounter with but after we had sex I woke up the next day with a pain where I usually get cramps and I felt inflammated, why is that?

This could be due to your partner being large or rough during intercourse.
More than likely it is the uterus being hit during sexual activity causing it to become sore. Maybe you could ask your partner to take it slow and not thrust so hard and deep. That may help relieve the pain, but this is normal as long as it does not last for long periods of time (over 5 or 6 days). If you continue to experience pain, consult your doctor as you may have some type of infection.

I recently went off the pill due to irregular periods occuring, my boyfriend and I have been having sexual intercourse (using condoms), but I didn't get my period when it is normally due. No condoms broke. Is it possible that I could be pregnant or is my body adapting to being off the pill?

It can take a while for your periods to come back after you stop taking the pill. For the most women it's 2 to 4 weeks before you have a period, but this depends on the individual and what your cycle is normally like.
Your periods may be irregular when you first come off the pill, and you should allow up to six months for your natural cycle to re-establish itself fully.
If you are worried about being pregnant, just to be sure, take a pregnancy test.

I'm a female and about 2 years ago I had genital warts which went away over time. What does that mean for my future? Should I be worried? I always use protection these days and they haven't reappeared. I'm embarrassed to go back to the doctor about the problem...besides the standard GP where can you go for sexual health?

Did you see your doctor and get diagnosed? Once you catch the genital warts virus, you have it forever, even if there are no symptoms. You are doing the right thing by using protection to make sure you don't pass on the virus.
There are many sexual health clinics available. Do a quick search on the internet for "sexual health clinics" in your state.

Is anal sex painful?

With practice, anal sex may not hurt. With enough lubricant and enough patience, it's entirely possible to enjoy anal sex as a safe and fulfilling part of your sex life.
See other answers for advice on anal penetration.

My fiance and I started having sex about 2 months ago. He was a virgin before me, but I have a 9 month old son. He says that it doesn't worry him and that sex is still excellent, but I was wondering if having a baby loosens the inner muscles of the vagina? I have more pleasure now than I did before I had my son, but I don't want him to miss out.

Being pregnant and having vaginal delivery may weaken or stretch some of the supporting structures in the pelvis. The delivery itself may damage nerves, leading to muscle weakness.
If it is worrying you try, some pelvic floor excercises to strengthen the area. But it seems that both of you are enjoying sex so stop worrying and have fun.

My boyfriend and I have unprotected sex, and recently I have wanted to use a condom again but he doesn't want to. How do I get him to wear one? Also sometimes when we have sex, some of the positions we do hurt me, this is usually when my legs are up near my head, why does it hurt?

Your boyfriend needs to be respectful of you, so tell him that you won't have sex with him until he agrees to use a condom. Try the Four Seasons Naked condoms. They are ultra thin so it feels like you are not wearing a condom at all.
Experiencing pain in certain positions could be due to several things such as stretching and lubrication. Check out the animated positions on the website for other ideas that may not be painful. If this problem is concerning you get checked out by a gynaecologist.

I feel like my flaps are bigger than normal and I feel really uncomfortable. I don't really even let my boyfriend look down there all that much. I have been with him over a year. How big is too big?

Like every part of the human body sizes can vary greatly from woman to woman. Vaginal areas come in all shapes and sizes and can look very different from each other.
You need to try and love yourself as you are but if this becomes a barrier to you leading a "normal" life then perhaps consult your gynaecologist for advice.

My boyfriend cums to quick, sex only lasts for around 15 seconds. I've never cum ever during sex and I'm starting to doubt that I ever will. I'm thinking of trying the stimulating gel or the vibrating ring but I'm afraid that my boyfriend will cum even faster. What should I do?

There are lots of products readily available to prolong ejaculation if this is a big issue for you. Before you resort to that, you may want to try the arouse gel with plenty of gentle clitoral stimulation and extra lube if you get dry. Try and get him to delay penetration until you have reached an orgasm first and then he can penetrate and take you over the edge. He can try the extra strength condom which is a bit thicker and may reduce sensations. The important thing is that he continues to try and please you even if he has cum, he cant be selfish here. For some women orgasm from penetration alone is very difficult.

Are thinner condoms weaker than normal?

Four Seasons ultra thin condoms are made with a special latex formulation, to achieve first class strength and sensitivity.
All of our conmdoms including ultra thin must pass all of the ISO4074 tests, including tensile strength, air pressure and electronic current seepage test, so while they are thinner they are not necessarily weaker.
Among the main causes of condom breakage are the lack of lubrication, air trapped inside the condom or fitting too tight a condom, all of which are not related directly to condom wall strength.
Ultra thin condoms do require very good manufacturing knowledge to produce however, and are often more expensive.

I am really uncomfortable about my body, I have been with my boyfriend for over a year, he tells me I have a beautiful body but I feel he is just saying that to make me feel better about myself and to feel more comfortable naked around him. How can I feel comfortable with my body and being naked around him?

Only you can learn to love your body, no-one can make you feel beautiful, it has to come from within.
Look at yourself naked, focus on what you like about your body. Feel your breasts, hips, thighs and think sexy - touch is a very sensual so try some silky material.
Just as some men prefer blondes, not all men like skinny, not all men like big boobs.

I love having sex with my boyfriend but I don't know how to ask for it, I don't want to just come out and say let's have sex, I want to know how to let him know I want to have sex without just asking for it directly.

Maybe show him physically by coming up behind him and giving him a hug, start kissing his neck and move your hands around onto his chest in a slow and soft motion. Or maybe suggest that you have a shower together.
We have a new condom called a "Quickie" why not ask him "Do you fancy a Quickie?"

My wife is on the pill and we occasionally have sex without a condom. After I have ejaculated in her she smells quite pungent from the vagina for 2-3 days, especially when she sits down. Is this normal or is there a reaction with my sperm causing the smell?

Your wife may have a condition called Bacterial Vaginosis, it is sometimes called BV or Gardnerella. It is a very common condition which affects women only. Bv is not a sexually transmitted infection, however being sexually active may increase the possibility of BV occuring.
It is normal for different types of bacteria to live in the vagina. If the mix of bacteria changes, then BV can occur.
You can confirm this by having a test done at any sexual health clinic or by your own doctor.

My boyfriend wants to ejaculate inside my vagina...he says I will be able to feel him or the splashing of his cum...Is it true, can a girl feel the guy ejaculate inside us?

I have done a bit of research and there is no evidence to suggest that a woman can feel a man ejaculate inside her.
If you do want to do this you need to think about the risk of Sexually Transmitted Infections and pregnancy.

Lately my boyfriend has been bringing up sex. I always wondered while giving head am I meant to swallow? What happens when I do swallow? Is it possible to get pregnant by swallowing?

There are several issues here and the most important is that you SHOULD ONLY EVER DO WHAT YOU ARE COMFORTABLE DOING. Don't be pressured into having sex before you are ready.
To swallow or not to swallow again is a personal choice. Remember that any unprotected sexual contact, including oral, leaves you susceptible to STIs. If you don't use a condom, you will need to decide before he cums if you will swallow his semen - you will not get pregnant from swallowing. If you are happy for him to cum in your mouth and you choose not to swallow, make sure you have some tissues handy that you can spit into. If you don't want him to cum in your mouth, pull away when he is close to cumming and continue rubbing with your hand, cheek or even breasts until he reaches orgasm.

I always have a white discharge and it is always on my underwear. Is it normal and how do I stop it?

Normal vaginal secretions help vagina's stay healthy by regularly flushing them out and maintaining their normally acidic environment. Healthy vaginal juices can have a mild scent, or no aroma at all, and can be:
*Clear or milky white when moist
*Yellowish in colour when dried
*Mucus-like or stringy in consistency
Heavier:
*During mid cycle, when ovulation occurs
*When sexually aroused
*During pregnancy
*When using birth control pills

If you have an abnormal discharge that changes colour or smells offensive you may have an infection.

My girlfriend seems to be struggling to relax when I'm about to go downtown on her. She is self conscious of how she tastes I think...
What ways are there for me to help her relax? I really want her to feel good.

This is quite a common reaction as oral sex for women is a very intimate experience. Why not start off by showering together, tasting her whilst you bathe her and then move it out of the shower. Talk to her as you move down her body and expressing your delight in the taste of her.

I'm really into rougher/kinkier sex, but my boyfriend is not. He is fairly simple with his tastes. Do you have any tips to gently introduce him to what I enjoy?

Communication is the key. Perhaps start off slowly - moving gradually into the rougher/kinkier sex rather than jumping straight in.
Your boyfriend may have been brought up to believe that these things are wrong and it will take time and understanding for him to move past it.
Perhaps you could whisper your suggestions to him when you are hot and heavy - i.e. "baby how hot would it be if you...." or "I really want to......you right now"
Make it fun and not intimidating and hopefully he will come along for the ride.

Me and my boyfriend had sex for the first time. I was really nervous. I didn't realize my period had started that day, so we went ahead and did it. We used a condom, but his penis kept slipping out of my vagina during intercourse. After we were done, he pulled out, condom still on, and something wet was dripping on me, not blood. What is this, and do you think I'm pregnant?

Some women have more natural lubrication than others, and some can even experience female ejaculation where there is a "gushing" of fluid inside the woman. This is quite normal and common, although not necessarily discussed as much as it should be.
If his penis slipped out of your vagina, but the condom stayed on and was not damaged, then the chances of you being pregnant are minimal.

My boyfriend was masturbating the other night and he ejaculated all over my vagina, all over my lips and the entrance...Can his sperm travel up inside my vagina? Can I get pregnant?

You are certainly at risk of pregnancy and catching an STI. Sperm can survive for several hours outside the vagina and then make their way inside. Pregnancy will depend on where you were up to in your menstrual cycle. You need to ensure you use protection to prevent pregnancy and STIs.

Is it ok to put on two condoms for extra protection in case the other one breaks?

We would not recommend the use of two condoms at the one time as this can cause friction which may weaken the material and increase the chance that the condoms might break. We would recommend the use of the Four Seasons Extra Strength condoms which will give you additional protection for sustained intercourse.

My girlfriend is a virgin and we have tried so many times to have sex but I cannot enter her vagina. She is wet enough and relaxed. My penis is 16.3cm long and not that thick. What’s up with us and why can’t I get in? I don't want to hurt her...I'm so horny and am dieing to be inside her... What can I do???

Firstly, there is nothing wrong with either of you. Everyone is different and have different experiences.
Take things slow with lots of foreplay - kissing, massage, manual stimulation - and use a water based lubricant for ease of penetration. Even if, as you say, 'she is wet enough' this may not be enough and you will find extra lubricant will help. I know that you think that she is relaxed, but it would be very natural for her to tense up on penetration expecting pain and frustration.
If you cannot penetrate on the first attempt, pull back and try a bit more lube or stimulation and try again slowly. Whilst some female virgins feel discomfort or pain and bleeding on the first time, not all do and the level to which it affects your girlfriend will be unique to her. Listen to her and if she needs you to stop then STOP.
Sometimes, hymens are quite strong and inflexible. Can your girlfriend insert a tampon?? Can you insert your fingers?? The hymen doesn't actually break, it stretches and becomes more flexible. Perhaps you or she could try and insert fingers and gently massage the area where she feels resistance to try and "loosen up" the hymen. If this still doesn't work, then she may need to discuss her options with a health care professional.

I have recently had sex for the first time and have been told before hand that I will most probably find some discomfort and bleeding but I had none of this - is this normal?

Some hymens are thin and flexible and some are stronger and less flexible. Some girls are more physically active than others and some have used tampons or explored their bodies with their fingers. Some girls are very scared and tense and therefore not as open to penetration as a girl who is relaxed and sufficiently lubricated.
All of these things will contribute to the experiences of a girl's first sexual penetration. You are certainly normal as 'normal' is a very wide range on the scale.

My fiance and I started having sex about 2 months ago. He was a virgin before me, but I have a 9 month old son. He says that it doesn't worry him and that sex is excellent, but I was wondering if having a baby loosens the inner muscles of the vagina? I have more pleasure during sex now than I did before I had my son, but I don't want him to miss out.

If you gave birth naturally, then your vagina will have changed to some extent during the process and this will depend on the size of the baby, how many babies you have had and whether or not you did your pelvic floor exercises regularly.
If you haven't already done so, I strongly recommend that you begin to do pelvic floor exercises. The most important thing here is that you and your partner are happy and satisfied - try not to see problems that aren't there - just enjoy each other.

Does your Four Seasons Massage oil degrade the condoms or is it ok to use with sex as well?

The Four Seasons Massage Oil has ingredients that are not compatible with the latex in the condoms. Best to stick with a water based lubricant.

If I get pregnant and didn't know I was and keep taking the pill, how harmful is that to the baby?

The pill usually stops a woman from releasing an egg every month and therefore would not normally affect the embryo. There have been many women who have not experienced complications from taking the pill for a short time after conception and I would assume that you have stopped taking the pill now if you have confirmed your pregnancy. All women are different however and a check up as soon as possible is recommended. You could also ring the assistance line on the pill box or instructions for their advice.

Even though me and my girlfriend have had sex many times it still hurts her, what can I do?

Being relaxed is an important part of having comfortable sex, and so is being sufficiently aroused and well-lubricated before trying intercourse. One way to remedy this situation is to spend time touching each other, kissing, and caressing before you try to have intercourse. Intercourse then becomes an extension of other touching, and your body may be more physically ready for it. You may place your finger(s) inside your partner’s vagina while touching and/or kissing her clitoris till she is comfortable, and even feels pleasure. Try using Four Seasons Personal Lubricant for added lubrication. Your girlfriend will also need to try to relax before penetration - if she is expecting pain then she will tense her muscles up which will increase the discomfort.
If you find that the pain with intercourse, or attempted intercourse, does not diminish at all over time, then seeing a health care provider is your next step. S/he can help determine whether or not you might have a local infection, such as a yeast infection; or from a reaction to a birth control product, like foam, or lube; or vaginismus, a strong, involuntary tightening of the vaginal muscles, which does not allow a penis in (or sometimes a finger, or even a tampon)

Is sex safe inside a swimming pool or spa? Or will the chemicals used in them deteriorate the condoms?

Condoms aren't tested for the chemicals found in spas or hot tubs. Although, it is possible for infections to occur due to the chemicals and bacteria found in the water to be forced inside the vagina during sex. As the directions on condoms state, they should be stored away from sunlight, it is possible the hot water could have the same effect on them. Another problem could be that water could seep between the penis and the condom which could cause the condom to slip off. However, having said all that, using a condom in a spa or hot tub is much better than not using one at all.

My boyfriend has suggested that we use two condoms instead of one while having sex because it would decrease my chances of getting pregnant. Is this a good idea or not?

That is not a good idea. The reason for this is that the condoms would rub against each other, which would increase the chance of the condoms breaking. Condoms have an extremely high success rate, however if you do want to cancel out the risk even more, you could try using another form of contraceptive, along with the condom. However, to minimise the risk of contracting STDs, you do need to use condoms, as other birth control methods don't protect you against STDs.

Quite often when my boyfriend and I are having sex, the condom comes off inside me. It happens pretty frequently, and has never happened with other partners before. Why is this happening and how can I stop it?

Does the condom fit snugly around the shaft of your boyfriend's penis? If not, try Four Seasons Tighter Fitting Condoms, as this may help keep it on. The position you are having sex in could be what is causing the problem. Does the condom always come off when you are in one particular position? If so, then it might be an idea to experiment and try a few new ones. Another possibility is if your vagina is too dry, it could cause a pulling effect as you are having sex. Using lubricant will stop this problem. Your boyfriend might be having trouble maintaining his erection when he inside you, if he is the condom may loosen its grip and slip off. If this is the case you need to say and do things that will maintain arousal during sex.

Me and my boyfriend are both virgins. How important is it to use condoms? He keeps saying we won't need them, but I'm not sure.

It is very important! Even though you are both virgins, it is possible one of you may have caught an STD through oral sex. Sex, even the first time, can result in pregnancy, so it is important to use a condom if you don't want the first time you have sex to result in a child. You need to insist to your boyfriend you want to use a condom. Remember, if it's not on, it’s not on!

I was wondering if it's possible to get HIV from kissing?

It is not possible to get HIV from the saliva. To contract the HIV virus from saliva you would have to drink about half a litre of it at the same time. However, if the person you are kissing does have HIV and has cuts or abrasions in their mouth, it might be a good idea to refrain until they have healed.

My housemate has chlamydia and I was wondering if it is possible to catch from using the toilet seat?

Chlamydia is a sexually transmitted infection and cannot be caught from using the same toilet seat as someone who is infected.

I've noticed my boyfriend wakes up with an erection in the morning. Why does this happen and does it happen to all guys?

Many men think their penises are erect upon waking up because of urine build up in the bladder, but this is false. Morning erections are technically night time erections which happen during REM sleep (when most dreaming occurs). These spontaneous erections in the night are caused by specific Neuro reflexes that are stimulated during REM sleep. Most guys have nocturnal erections throughout their lifetime, and their frequency, along with one's awareness of them, may vary. These night/morning erections are noticeably stiffer/harder than those when awake. The penis can stay erect for up to two hours nightly, and not all men who have erections during the night wake up with one in the morning.

I had not had sex for over a year, then recently I did and experienced a little bleeding. I was wondering why this happened. Is it possible for the hymen to grow back?

It is not possible for the hymen to grow back, you could have had bleeding because you haven't experienced penetration in a while. Although, you may have bled due to a sexually transmitted infection, so it is a good idea to get it checked out by your doctor.

What's the best way to get rid of a hickey? My friends will give me a really hard time if they see it!

There isn't really any way to get rid of it quickly. A hickey is a bruise on your neck, just like a bruise on any other part of your body. It will go away in time, and all you have to do is wait it out. In the meantime, you might have to wear a scarf or a turtleneck.

My wife seems to be developing a sensitivity to condoms, which leads to her feeling pain during sex. We have tried using more lubricant but this does not help much. She is unable to use other forms of contraception, is there anything else we can do?

A common cause for sensitivity is when people develop a latex allergy. We recommend seeing a doctor to confirm this and to discuss alternatives.

Sometimes during sex I experience pain on one side of my vagina. Just at the entrance. It feels like I am bruised there. I don’t always feel the pain, but when I do we have to stop, but the next day it can be fine. Do you think its just bruising or something more serious?

We suggest that you consult your doctor.

Me and my boyfriend have been going out for almost four years....We have just started having sex over the past 5 months maybe. I think I come too quickly and too many times during sex, how can I prevent this from happening? And I love giving him head but I dislike the feeling when he does it back to me....My past partners I have felt the same with head...? How can I make it more fun and the feeling good?

We suggest that you try some different positions that minimise clitoral stimulation. Perhaps you should visit the animated sexual positions for some inspiration.
Four Seasons are bringing out a range of oral latex dams that may enhance pleasure of oral sex.
Don’t be afraid to tell your partner how you feel about oral sex as it may not be what you prefer.
We always recommend that if you have any concerns about your sexual function that you contact your local sex health clinic or GP for advice.

My boyfriend and I have been going out for one year and he is my first sexual partner. Sex has never been good for me and I hate doing it because he is the only one that comes. I do not orgasm or feel anything, not once. Is this normal?

Unfortunately, this is very common but shouldn't have to be. Sharing a sexual experience should be pleasurable for both partners - even if orgasm is not always achieved, pleasure should be.
Firstly, don't be embarrassed or scared to talk to your partner about how you feel. If he truly cares for you he will want to listen and help - he may not have any idea how unpleasant sex is for you.
Often, first sexual experiences can be clumsy and unfulfilling, especially for women. Sexual intimacy is a whole body experience and it's not just about penetration and orgasm. At the moment, each time you have sex your body is expecting something unpleasant and even painful and will react accordingly. Your partner needs to focus on you and your stimulation before he tries penetration.
He could try giving you a massage first to help you to relax (Four Seasons has a massage oil available in major supermarkets). Then continue the foreplay with kissing, nibbling and sucking the mouth, ears, nipples or any other sensitive areas that you enjoy. He could then use a water based lubricant (Four Seasons offer free sachets in most of our packets) and apply to the vaginal area and clitoris in a gentle, circular motion. Only when you are really turned on and stimulated should he try penetration. Even if he cums first, he could continue stimulating you until you reach orgasm or have experienced heightened pleasure. Show him what you like and how to do it.
It is a reality though for some women to have difficulty reaching orgasm. If you continue to have issues you should consult a health care professional who can suggest treatments. There are also some over the counter topical products which increase blood flow to the clitoris and can assist with arousal such as the Four Seasons Arouse Gel for Women and the Four Seasons Ice Lubricant.

If I have intercourse with my partner without a condom 3 days before/after her periods, is there any chance of her becoming pregnant?
Do all women who have unprotected sex get pregnant?

A woman is more likely to become pregnant in any particular month if she has unprotected intercourse during her most fertile period. This period usually starts about 3 days before ovulation and ends about 1-2 days after it. (10-18 days after the onset of menstruation).
As sperm can survive in the womb and fallopian tubes for three to four days and occasionally as long as a week it is very difficult to ensure that there is no sperm present when an egg is released. Further complicating matters is that some women have longer or shorter cycles than others so determining safe periods is very difficult, needs to be precise and has a high failure rate.
Whilst many factors have to line up to allow successful fertilization and conception, and not every unprotected sexual encounter will lead to pregnancy, if you truly want to avoid pregnancy then additional contraception is recommended.
A visit to a health care professional can help you and your partner to understand your individual fertile periods better and help you to manage your contraception, whether natural or assisted better.

After sex I get a small cut near the bottom of my vagina. My mother is allergic to condoms, is this a symptom of a latex allergy or is it usual to get cuts/tears after your first sexual encounters.

A latex allergy, just as any allergy, can be a serious condition and if you suspect you have a latex allergy you need to see a health care professional for diagnosis and treatment. Symptoms of latex allergy are: itchy red watery eyes, sneezing or runny nose, coughing, rash or hives, chest tightness or shortness of breath, shock.
The cut/tear that you are experiencing may also be due to not enough natural lubrication which may be causing friction and tearing. Natural lubrication can be effected by many factors such as hormones & stress. You and you partner could try more foreplay before penetration to increase your stimulation and natural lubrication.
You could also try a water based lubricant to assist. All Four Seasons condom packets come with free lubricant sachets. Sometimes, trying a different position may help as well.
The area where you have the cut/tear is also very sensitive and could easily become infected. If it does not get better or gets worse, you should really see a health care professional for advice and treatment and also to rule out other issues such as thrush.

My girlfriend thinks it is ok to have sex while she has her period. She says it wont cause any damage and that it's only classified as a "no go zone" because guys find it gross. Is this correct?

Your girlfriend is quite correct and it is fine to have sex during menstruation. Some women even find that orgasm can help to relieve cramps and that the menstrual blood adds lubrication.
In saying this however, it is important that you and your partner feel comfortable about the whole experience as sexual pleasure is a whole body experience taking into account sights, feel, smell and often taste.
If your girlfriend has a bath or shower immediately before sex and you put a thick towel underneath you this should minimise the mess created.
SPECIAL NOTE:
Blood is a good medium for certain infectious agents to grow in, and blood does transmit the HIV virus, so certainly those at risk should not have sex during a period - or ever have sex without a condom.

Is it true that women peak sexually at 30 and men at 18?

There were some studies done in the late 1940s and early 1950s which set the ideas about sexual peaks, especially in women. These reports were influenced by society's beliefs and constraints about sexuality and what was acceptable.
Everyone is different and therefore sexual peak and function varies between individuals. Today, most researches believe that sexual "peak" could occur at any time depending on a persons life experiences. Also as a persons circumstances change so may their interest in sex and sexual exploration.

Just wanting some information on using condoms in the shower or pool.

Having sex in different places can be exciting and stimulating, however there are several things to consider when using condoms in water.
Water in general will wash off any natural or applied lubrication which can cause more friction and increase the risk of the condom breaking. Also, as there is more friction due to less lubrication the skin could become grazed and open to allow the bacteria present in the water to infect the skin. Pool and spa water would not normally enter the vagina, so it is unwise to transmit this potentially bacteria laden water into the vagina.
Heat is not good for condoms either and can affect the integrity of the condom. As can chlorine or other additives in pool/spa water which can deteriorate the condom. You also run the risk of water getting inside the condom itself which can lead to the condom breaking.
We suggest foreplay in the pool and sex out of the pool.

I have sex with my girlfriend and sometimes after she gets painful stabbing feelings in her gut then she gets all worried about it. What is going on there?

Your girlfriend needs to see a doctor about this straight away for assessment and treatment.

My husband and I have been using the Four Seasons Personal Lubricant with the glow in the dark tube. We are trying to conceive and I read on a birth website that lubricant can kill the sperm or make it harder for it to travel to the fallopian tubes. Can you tell me if this is the case with the lubricant we are using?

Sperm are very vulnerable, so all lubricants have the potential to slow the rate of pregnancy to some extent.
Care has been taken in choosing ingredients in the Four Seasons Regular Lubricant (also found in the Glow in the Dark Tube) to have minimal effect.
Lubes are for fun, but better left out of making babies. The lubes do no harm but may extend the time it takes to fall pregnant.

Is there such a thing as a dental dam, which is a flat piece of prophylactic material to protect the vagina and clitoris from oral sex germs?

Yes, there is such a thing as a dental dam. It gets its name because it was originally (and still is) in use at dentists' office. It's that wide piece of latex they stretch over your mouth when isolating a specific tooth to work on. However, the dentist versions are not really designed for intimate things. Dental dams can be used for safe oral sex. Just lay it over the vulva area and go to town. They are also quite useful for safe anilingus (rimming), just put it over the anus. You can also use a condom (Four Seasons Flavoured condoms are great!). Open the condom, unroll it, and snip the ring at the end, making a single cut down to the tip. This gives you a thin sheet of latex that you can use.

My girl and I have great sex. She let me give her anal sex, so I suggested that since she gave me her sensitive area, I should do the same. I have, and sex is great. But it hurts!

When having anal sex, pain is a signal that something is wrong. Anal play, including penetration, should never hurt. If you feel pain, you may have inserted something too large, or moved too quickly or vigorously. Always start small (fingertip) and then work your way up to more fingers or toys. Use tons and tons of lubricant; the anus is not self-lubricating and can tear easily. Finally, go very slowly and listen to your body. If it hurts, stop what you are doing right away.

I am a bisexual woman and want to know are there STD risks with oral sex giving and receiving with a woman if I don't use a dental dam?

Yes, it's a common misconception that sex between women is without risk. The risk for getting an STI through oral sex between women increases if one partner has or has had unprotected sex with men with STIs (whether known or not). Herpes, for example can definitely be transmitted to the giver or receiver through unprotected oral sex if one of them is in the infectious stage, including when sores are not visible. If you or your partner have herpes blisters or cold sores, in and around your mouth and facial areas, it is highly likely that genital herpes will develop when these herpes lesions and/or its contents come into direct contact with the genital area, such as during oral-genital sex.
Yeast infection, gonorrhoea, and syphilis can be transmitted, as can human papilloma virus (HPV) the virus that causes genital warts, and Chlamydia, though both are rarely passed on this way.

My girlfriend likes giving head when my penis is covered in chocolate or whipped cream. If there is any chocolate or whipped cream left on my penis, can inserting my penis into her vagina cause problems?

Oily and sugary products are not recommended for warm moist areas as they encourage the growth of yeast and bacteria. Keep the chocolate, champagne and whipped cream for play outside the tender parts of the genitals. You may like to visit an adult shop or shop online for sugar and glycerine free edible products that you can substitute that will not cause further issues.

When the boy pulls out before he cums is there such a thing as pre-cum that you can get pregnant from?

Yes there may be sperm present in pre-cum which can lead to pregnancy. If the boy has ejaculated recently, not all sperm may have been expelled, some can stay behind and be flushed out with pre-cum. Urinating after ejaculation can also help to flush out stray sperm - just remember it only takes one to conceive. If the boy withdraws and ejaculates outside the vagina and then reinserts his penis, sperm may still be present which can lead to pregnancy.
Just remember to always practise safe sex for protection against pregnancy and STIs. Not all STIs need fluids to be transmitted, some can also be transmitted by skin to skin contact. Therefore you really need the protection of a condom or dam during all sexual contact.

Can you get pregnant through anal sex?

The anal passage is not directly connected to the female reproductive organs therefore sperm entering via the anus have no chance of fertilising an egg. Similarly, sperm entering via the mouth cannot cause pregnancy.
However, it is very important to remember that any ejaculated sperm (even pre-ejaculate) around/near the vaginal opening has the potential to work its way inside and creates the possibility of pregnancy. Also, care needs to be taken when cleaning up any semen around the anus so that it is not 'wiped' into the vaginal area.
When engaging in any form of sexual contact, you need to make a decision as to whether pregnancy is all you are protecting against. It is highly recommended to practise safe sex for protection from STIs also by using a condom or dam during sexual contact.

I'm having trouble having sex with my girlfriend as I can't even get my dick inside her she is so tight. Any ideas?

Patience, Patience, Patience
I would suggest lots of foreplay and relaxation. If the experience has become painful for your girlfriend then she will be tensing up therefore making penetration much more difficult.
Use generous amounts of lubricant and take it very slowly to avoid injury.
If your girlfriend is a virgin and you still find penetration is not happening she may need to visit a doctor for assistance in breaking the hymen.

I am on birth control and my boyfriend keeps suggesting we don't use condoms, is that such a good idea?

When you say birth control, I will assume you mean the birth control pill. Obviously the pill only protects against pregnancy - and it's not 100% effective.
Using a condom as well (also not 100% effective) will decrease the chance of falling pregnant, especially if you forget to take a dose or are ill or are taking other medications such as antibiotics.
The big issue is protection against STI's. Are you monogamous? Is your partner? Have you both been tested for HIV or Hepatitis C?
Some STI's can change your life forever and you need to be certain that you protect yourself whilst considering your boyfriends feelings. Have a talk with him and discuss your options. If it is a new relationship perhaps take some time to see how it progresses.

Is it possible to break the condom during oral sex by my girlfriend’s teeth rubbing against it?

Whilst condoms are designed and tested to take the rigours of standard vaginal intercourse all care must be taken not to damage the condom when tearing open the condom foil. Extra care must also be used so that teeth, jewellery or finger nails don't damage the condom.
Sometimes, if the tip of the condom is not squeezed to expel air on application, trapped air can create a seal that makes the condom more susceptible to breakage/popping. It is also important to remember that condoms are one use only, after ejaculation, carefully withdraw the condom whilst the penis is still erect holding the rim to avoid leakage.

My girlfriend is a virgin and after talking, she thinks she is ready to have sex. Being her first time, are there any tips for how to make it an enjoyable experience for us both?

The key here is communication and patience, the fact that you have asked us shows that you care about your girlfriend and her feelings. Whilst we are sometimes shy about discussing our feelings or sexual desires, communicating what we like or don't like allows us to feel comfortable and in control. Take things slow with lots of foreplay - kissing, massage, manual stimulation - and if necessary use a water based lubricant for ease of penetration. If you cannot penetrate on the first attempt, pull back and try a bit more lube or stimulation and try again slowly. Whilst some female virgins feel discomfort or pain and bleeding on the first time, not all do and the level to which it affects your girlfriend will be unique to her. Listen to her and if she needs you to stop then STOP. Always use a condom and stay safe.

My boyfriend and I love to have oral but we don't use a condom. Could I get a disease if we do anything? Is it bad to swallow? All my friends say that I'll get a stomach virus or something.

STI's can be transmitted during oral sex without a condom. If infected with HIV, then the HIV virus can be transmitted in the semen although the risk is lower than vaginal or anal sex. The Herpes virus and gonorrhoea can also be transmitted during oral sex without a condom and as they are often asymptomatic, it's hard to tell if you or your partner has an infection. As far as getting a stomach virus goes, I have done some research and have not been able to find any evidence of this happening.
If any doubt, always use a condom.

How do you give guys oral sex with pleasure and not feel the disgusting stuff in the end?

I take it you mean, how do you handle the semen/ejaculate once the guy climaxes. Firstly you could use a condom, which as answered previously, also offers protection against HIV and STI's. This would be highly recommended if you are in a casual or multi partner situation.
Not all guys like condoms, but you need to consider your right to protection and also your partner’s needs. If you do not like to swallow or have the cum in your mouth, then speak to your partner and discuss the situation.
Other options are: - the guy can pull out prior to ejaculation and deposit his semen into a tissue. If he does cum in your mouth, you could discreetly dispose of the cum in a tissue.

My boyfriend and I have sex at least twice a day and honestly can’t get enough of it. Is there such a thing as too much sex?

No, so long as you are both willing participants and ensure protection and adequate lubrication is used at all times. Go for it!

I've been steady with my girlfriend for a while now, we don't use a condom during sex because she is on the pill, we normally just don't have sex when she is on antibiotics or misses a dose. Is there anyway to catch a STI just randomly?

If you are monogamous and you are certain that your partner is also, then the chances of catching an STI randomly are very low.

I have delivered my daughter in Feb 2007 and I am feeding her. After delivery, periods became irregular due to feeding. Are condoms safe?

Unless you have an allergy to latex then using a condom whilst breast feeding is perfectly safe.

I would like to know if there is anything in particular that I can do to increase my chance of reaching orgasm. My boyfriend feels inadequate that he can't get me there, but I just can't...I'm not sure if it’s because he has no idea about foreplay, or if he changes position too often...

Have you tried the Four Seasons Arouse gel? Most women find it easier to reach an orgasm with clitoral stimulation. You can also try the Four Seasons Ice Lubricant as more lubrication may be needed.

Is it true that as soon as sperm hits the air it dies so no matter if it’s near the vagina you cannot get pregnant in any way?

Sorry but this is not the case. As sperm is ejaculated in semen it can survive up to a couple of hours outside the vagina depending on the environment, i.e. temperature, semen not drying out etc. Think of all the men who donate sperm or have their sperm tested, if their sperm died immediately it would be extremely difficult to do this.
If the sperm is ejaculated inside the vagina it can last 4-7 days.
If you are trying to avoid pregnancy and STI's you are best to use a condom.

Previously, I have been completely against anal sex and 2 out of my 3 sexual partners have asked me/tried very hard to convince me to do it. I now find myself considering it slightly but apart from the pain I am concerned about faeces coming in contact with his penis. Is this usual during anal sex and is there any way to prevent this from happening?

Ensure the anal area is clean and the bowel is empty. This is important both aesthetically and practically. If the bowel is empty, there is no more risk of the receptive partner passing faeces during anal sex than there is of the insertive partner passing urine.
We would highly recommend the use of condoms and lubricant during anal sex to protect from passing on HIV & STI's.

My boyfriend and I casually have anal sex without a condom, and sometimes it’s painful and I bleed - is that a bad sign?

Lubricant should help considerably with making penetration easier and less painful.
There are also some other answers on anal sex that may help you also.
The bleeding could possibly be from a haemorrhoid. There are also some over the counter ointments that may help from the chemist. If you continue to have bleeding you should see your doctor.

Can penetration lead to sex, even if the male does not cum?

As penetration is sex (whether vaginal, anal or oral penetration), I think you mean 'can penetration lead to pregnancy, even if the male does not cum?'
This practise is actually called the "withdrawal method" of contraception and it has the highest failure rate of all contraception.
Even if the male has enough control to withdraw before orgasm, he may produce pre-cum which can contain sperm. This can be very risky. If the male withdraws and ejaculates outside the vagina and then reinserts his penis, sperm may still be present which can also lead to pregnancy.
It is also important to remember that not all STIs need fluids to be transmitted, some can also be transmitted by skin to skin contact. Therefore you really need the protection of a condom or dam during all sexual contact.

I was wondering what exactly a woman's climax feels like. Very rarely after I have sex, I get pins and needles in my legs and arms and sometimes my fingers go stiff because the pins and needles are so strong. I'm not too sure if this is supposed to happen!

This is a very hard question to answer as a climax can be a very different experience for different women.
Some women report a sensation of tingling in the spine, brain and genital areas. They may feel waves of contractions and heat/cold. While some women can experience being on the verge of passing out or exploding, for others their experience is somewhat less than that of "earth moving". Sometimes, a woman's body will go completely rigid during orgasm and they may have muscle contractions not just in the pelvic regions. Some women may even spray or emit fluids (female ejaculation).
Perhaps you may want to try masturbating and bringing yourself to orgasm to see if you are truly experiencing an orgasm during sex. This can also help you in expressing to a partner what you like so they can help bring you to orgasm also.

My boyfriend has lots of endurance when it comes to sex. He can go ages without cumming, I cum quite quickly but after a while it starts to hurt me. I feel bad because I have not satisfied him - Is there anything I can do to make him come quicker?

Try to have foreplay for a bit longer so that he is just about ready to climax before penetration. Oral stimulation, a sexy dance or massage may help. You may need to apply some or more lubricant so that you don't dry out and cause too much friction during thrusting.

What do you suggest are the best positions for a woman to get off too? Some positions my boyfriend loves but I don't feel as much pleasure as he does.

Most women need clitoral stimulation to reach orgasm. The best positions for women then are those that best stimulate the clitoris such as being on top. Manual stimulation of the clitoris during penetration can also be highly effective such as spooning whilst your partner gently massages your clitoris - a bit of extra lube can help stimulation also. You could also try the Four Seasons Arouse Gel or the Four Seasons Ice Lubricant for that little something extra.
In all Four Seasons Condom packets you can complete and send in a survey to receive a pin code to view animated sexual positions that may give you some extra ideas.

Me & my partner want to have a baby. I told her if I use a condom she can't get pregnant. How can we have sex and stay safe at the same time?

As far as reducing the risk of transmitting STI's & HIV without using a condom, you really cant if you don't use a condom or dam as a barrier. Obviously, using a barrier will reduce the chance of pregnancy. Your best suggestion would be for you both to have some tests at the doctors to rule out that either of you are carrying any STIs.

Me and my girlfriend have sex and right after I cum her vagina hurts a little, like a tingle kind of feeling -what could be the cause of this?

Although quite rare, there is such a thing as a semen allergy. If it was an allergy though, the symptoms of tingling, itching, swelling would probably be present on other parts of the body also.
There has also been a link between progestin (hormone in contraceptives) and a condition called vulvar vestibulitis, which is a constant inflammation of the vulva. Because the skin is inflamed, everything hurts it, including semen. As you are obviously not using condoms your girlfriend may be on the pill and may be experiencing this issue. She could speak to her doctor about this and perhaps look at a different pill that may not affect her. She could try stopping the pill for 1 cycle and using condoms to see if the symptoms ease - be careful to follow the instructions on when the pill would be effective again.
If the symptoms get worse or are really affecting your sex life, consult your doctor.

Every time I masturbate my back hurts and I feel weaker and lazy - why is this? I am 18 years old.

You did not say if you are male or female or how often you are masturbating so it is hard to pinpoint what the issue is. The following points may apply to you. If you are concerned at all, you should seek medical advice.
* Masturbation, like any other physical activity, can be tiring. Your heart rate and blood pressure increases, your breathing quickens as you release endorphins into your blood stream which can cause you to feel flushed, giddy, warm or sleepy.
* Your pain may be due to muscle spasms or cramps. Many people during masturbation or sex will tense up the muscles in their body. If the muscles are held rigid they may start to cramp up or to spasm, which can be quite painful. If this is the case relax the tense muscles. Make sure your back is supported properly.
* A normal part of sexual arousal is for the genitals to become flushed with blood. If sexual arousal is prolonged and orgasm does not occur within a reasonable amount of time there may be some congestion or pressure.

I recently discovered that I have warts and me and my boyfriend tried condoms so he wouldn't catch them but I don't like them, they hurt me while having sex - can u suggest something else we can do without having to wear them.

From the name supplied I am ascertaining that you are female. Warts can be quite contagious so unless you treat them you risk passing them on to your partner if you do not use barrier protection such as a condom or dam.
Condoms are used to reduce the risk of transmitting STIs and to reduce the chances of pregnancy. I think that the reason the condoms are hurting you is the lack of lubrication. Try more foreplay or use a water based lubricant.

I'm 14 now, if I have sex with my girlfriend are there any problems?

The big questions to ask yourself are:
* Will I always use protection of a condom against pregnancy and STIs.
* Are you aware that no contraception is 100% effective - are you and your girlfriend prepared to accept the consequences of a broken condom - i.e. pregnancy or STI.
* Are you and your girlfriend ready to deal with the emotional aspects of having sex. Do you have the same expectations and emotions about sex.
* Will there be any negative outcomes for waiting as opposed to not waiting.
You and your girlfriend will need to make this decision together. You may want to read some of the other questions on "losing your virginity" and how to make the experience pleasurable and memorable for you both.
It is also important to know that in NSW, VIC, ACT, NT and WA the Age of Consent for homosexual and heterosexual sex is 16 years. In SA and TAS it is 17 and QLD have a discriminatory Age of Consent.
"An age of consent is designed to protect young and innocent children from physical and psychological harm caused by engaging in sexual intercourse before he or she is mature enough to consent to such activity." (www.parliament.nsw.gov.au)
Obviously, some people mature earlier than others and you are a couple of years under the age of consent. If your girlfriend is over 16, there could be some legal issues.

My boyfriend enjoys anal sex and because it's excruciatingly painful otherwise, we always use heaps of lube. However, the lube has the same feel and consistency as laxative which is inserted up the anus, and after anal sex I usually rush off to the toilets and stay there for hours for the terrible diarrhoea-like feelings to subside. It really ruins the experience and I have a lot of resentment towards him on my part because of this. Is there a practical solution??

Ingredients in the lubricants can also be found in the anal laxatives you mentioned and may in some people have a similar laxative effect. If your bowels are not emptied prior to anal sex, you may experience an after flow of "loose stools" or " diarrhoea like feelings" which some people find a pleasurable experience and some, such as yourself, do not. You can try using the lube prior to anal sex to empty your bowels. Also anal foreplay (massaging the anus) can help turn the 'unpleasant after feelings' into those you enjoy more.
Your response to anal sex is not uncommon. For some people, finding anal sex pleasant is a learned response which takes patience and understanding from your partner. Obviously, this build up of resentment will affect your relationship in the long term and you need to be honest about your feelings with your partner and decide whether it is right for you.

I am having a creamish discharge and my lower abdomen is always painful. Is that an STD and which antibiotics can I take?

Thank you for your question. As we are not doctors we can therefore only strongly suggest that you see your doctor as soon as you can. Your health is very important and you should not be embarrassed to see a medical professional or put off doing so.
Pain is your body's way of telling you that something needs attention. It may be something quite simple and treatable but if left untreated can turn serious. Don't take the chance - see a medical professional now.

What is the best way to give a head job?

The most important thing is to be relaxed and comfortable. Kneeling on the floor or bed will put you in a great position to access all areas. Cleanliness can be an issue for him and her, so if concerned, why not start off with a sexy shower first. There is no need to dive straight in, start off with some caressing, licking and nibbling of the chest and nipples, slowly move down over the stomach and tease your way around the inner thigh and genital area. Then proceed as below.
Communication is very important. Tell each other what you like, don't like or where to touch, lick or suck.

TIPS TO PLEASE HIM

Using your tongue, lick up and down the shaft of his penis gently but firmly concentrating on some of his more sensitive parts. The extra sensitive areas are the glans (the dark pink tissue, full of nerve endings), the rim of the head of the penis and the frenulum (where the foreskin attaches to the penis).
Once you are ready to take his penis fully into your mouth, ensure that you cover your teeth with your lips so that you don't accidentally bite him. Use your thumb and fingers to make a ring around the base of his penis to allow you greater control over depth of penetration, speed etc. Using bursts of suction, move your mouth up and down and left to right over his penis whilst holding the base with your fingers.
As with any sexual contact, you need to reduce the risk of transmitting STIs by using a condom. You can use saliva or water based lubricant to make it slippery and sensual for him.
If you don't use a condom, you will need to decide before he cums if you swallow his semen. If you are happy for him to cum in your mouth and you choose not to swallow, make sure you have some tissues handy that you can spit into. If you don't want him to cum in your mouth, pull away when he is close to cumming and continue rubbing with your hand, cheek or even breasts until he reaches orgasm.

TIPS TO PLEASE HER

The clitoris is undoubtedly the most sensitive part of a woman's body. It can be a little tricky to locate as it can be hidden between the top of the vaginal lips (labia). When you find it though, you should be able to tell by her reaction. Her clitoris will need much more stimulation than a penis to achieve orgasm. For some women, the clitoris may be very sensitive and light pressure is all that is required, again, listen to her and look for her reactions.
Once she is sufficiently aroused, start using your lips to kiss and suck around the clitoris and genital area. Vary your tongue movements from light, swirling around the bud of the clitoris to gentle, firm sucking. You can flick your tongue over the clitoris in a steady rhythm and insert your tongue in the vagina.
As with any sexual contact, you need to reduce the risks of transmitting STIs by using a barrier such as a dam.

My partner has syphilis, what risk am I - would I already have it?

If you have had unprotected sexual contact with a person who has any STI, then you are at risk of contracting the STI yourself. You should see your doctor for a blood test which will determine if you have contracted Syphilis.
Whilst Syphilis is transmitted through contact with a person who has Syphilis Sores (chancre), the sores cannot always be seen and many people experience no symptoms for many years.

There are 3 stages of Syphilis.

1. Primary Stage - Usually a single sore will appear - it is usually firm, round, small and painless. This sore will usually heal without treatment in 3-6 weeks. If adequate treatment is not received though, the infection progresses to the Secondary stage. From the time of contracting Syphilis it may take 10-90 days for the first sign of symptoms to appear.

2. Secondary Stage - Typically starts with a rash on one or more parts of the body that may not be itchy. The rash can appear as rough reddish or brownish spots on the palms of the hands or soles of the feet. Sometimes the rash can appear on other parts of the body and be very faint and unnoticeable. Other symptoms can include fever, swollen lymph glands, sore throat, patchy hair loss, headaches, weight loss, muscle aches and fatigue which makes it easy to confuse with other diseases. These symptoms will often disappear without treatment, but without treatment the disease will progress to the next stage.

3. Late Stage - This stage begins when secondary symptoms disappear. Without treatment, the infected person will continue to have syphilis even though there are no symptoms. The risks with this stage of Syphilis, is damage the internal organs, including the brain, nerves, eyes, heart, blood vessels, liver, bones and joints. This internal damage may show up many years later. Signs such as paralysis, numbness, gradual blindness and dementia. This damage may be serious enough to cause death.

How do I go about asking my boyfriend for DP without sounding like a sexual deviant?

There are several ways DP (Double Penetration) could occur...you could be penetrated simultaneously by 2 men - 1 vaginally and 1 anally. It could also be with another woman using a dildo or using their hand.
When it comes to sexual positions, personal preferences and fantasies will all come into play. The key is communication. If you are concerned about bringing up the subject "out of the blue", why not hire an X rated movie or buy a magazine/book that shows DP to gauge your boyfriend's reaction - you never know he may have fantasised about it already.
Just always remember the safety basics. When going between the anus and vagina and vice versa, you need a new condom each time to minimise the risk of transmitting bacteria. Use plenty of lube when being penetrated anally and make sure that you feel safe and comfortable, there is always a risk of injury when doing DP. Make sure you trust your partners and perhaps have a "safety word" that if you say it means STOP IMMEDIATELY.

Me and my boyfriend have been having sex and he has just told me he has an STI and the condom broke

There is a chance then that you have contracted an STI. Find out which STI your partner has and see your doctor for diagnosis and treatment.

I know this may be a somewhat strange question. On all your condom packets it suggests using lubricant. Is this a necessity, will it be very painful if a water-based lube is not used (just partner's natural lubrication)? Obviously, penetration would not even be attempted until partner is highly aroused.

It is up to you and your partner to decide whether more than just the natural lubrication is needed. If penetration is painful for your partner, then maybe try some more foreplay to increase natural lubrication otherwise you will need to use artificial lubrication to make penetration easier and pain-free.
It probably wouldn't hurt to make sure you're well hydrated before sex, and spending plenty of time on foreplay is a great way to start things off.
There's nothing wrong with increasing slipperiness with artificial lube. Water-based lube is best: oil based lubes are another option but are not safe for use with condoms. Add a drop of water-based lube on the inside of a condom to increase pleasure for the penis. (Too much here can cause the condom to slip off, so save the liberal applications for outside the condom.)

Is it possible to get an STI if you have not had sex before? When I was a virgin I occasionally got large pimple like lumps on the skin just above my penis, since I have had sex with my girlfriend she has told me that she now has a lump near her clitoris. We were both virgins before we had sex so we haven't had sex with any one else and she also told me that she had a lump before a few years ago.

Even if you have never had vaginal or anal intercourse, it is possible to contract an STI through oral sex or skin-to-skin contact of the genitals.
What you have may be warts (caused by a different type of the virus) little pimples, or simply small growths that are part of your anatomy. If they are not irritated and have not changed in size or shape, there is likely nothing to worry about.
To be sure, get checked out by a health care professional and always use protection for future sexual contact.

My partner and I are newly weds. We believe we are still in a point that having a baby is still a long way to come to be able to take good care of, financially. We recently had unprotected sex because we were both so turned on...I know there is a chance that I may have "passed" on a few pre-cum to her and was wondering how long should we wait before taking a pregnancy test and any advice at this point apart that we should use Four Seasons Condoms.

Pregnancy tests are sensitive enough that they can detect a pregnancy as early as one week after fertilization. It is not necessary to wait until a period is late or has been missed before testing for pregnancy. When used correctly, home pregnancy tests work well. If you think you may be pregnant, wait seven to ten days after intercourse to test, following the test's directions carefully. If a home pregnancy test gives a positive result, make an appointment with your doctor for confirmation. If you prefer, you can make an appointment for a pregnancy test directly instead of testing at home first. In either case, it can only be to your benefit to find out as early as possible if you're pregnant.
If you have unprotected sex and are certain you do not want to risk becoming pregnant, you could also discuss the "morning after pill" with your partner and health care professional. If you choose this option you need to take it within 72 hours after intercourse.

Me and my friend had sex. She is on the pill but she missed it once. We started having sex without a condom so I pulled out. She missed her period today and is waiting to see if she will get it tomorrow. What's the possibility of her falling pregnant?

It's very hard to say, withdrawal alone isn't an effective form of contraception both because a man may not always have control over when he ejaculates and also because pre-ejaculatory fluid may contain sperm. It also depends where she was up to in her menstrual cycle.
Even though the pill is very effective in preventing pregnancy, it isn't 100 percent effective. Because of this, it may be a good idea to discuss with your partner her feelings, and yours, about what you would do if pregnancy became an issue and whether you would consider using the "morning after pill" or other options.
Also, neither the pill nor withdrawal will protect you and your partner against sexually transmitted infections (STIs). To protect against STI's, use a condom in addition to any other form of contraception (such as the pill).

Click here to submit your questions!

Advice is of a general nature, for specific advice consult a health care professional.