Im a 24 year old male, with an uncircumsized penis. Ive had 6 sexual partners, all of which Ive used condoms but never pulled my foreskin back before penetration. After reading your men's health section I began wondering if Ive been "doing it right" all this time! Should I be pulling the foreskin back or is it a personal choice? I pull my foreskin back to clean it regularly, so it does stretch but Im still afraid of tearing my foreskin by pulling it back over an erection.

It is a personal choice whether you pull your foreskin back or not when using a condom. The penis will be more sensitive during sexual penetration if the foreskin is pulled back.
Next time you are alone and have an erection, just try pulling the foreskin back slowly. Use a bit of lubricant to help you. If it goes back easily, next time you have sex give it a try with it pulled back with a very small drop of lubricant if you feel you need it.

Hi I was interested to know about lubricants. Me and my girlfriend are interested in finding out which form of lubricant is most effective at achieving pleasure between us. Ive used water based in sex and it works well. Ive also used arouse gel for my girlfriend but it wasnt that great. Ive also heard of oil based! Which are the most effective and are there many other types which I havent mentioned?

Four Seasons recommends using a water based lubricant. The oil based lubricant you mentioned should not be used when you are using a condom as it can cause the condom to break.
The Arouse gel is just for clitoral stimulation and any excess needs to be wiped off, its not effective as a lubricant.
We have the Ice lubricant which contains menthol. It starts off with a cooling sensation and then heats up. We also have Pure, an all natural lubricant that is free from synthetic thickners or petrochemicals. Check out the Four Seasons Lubricant range on our website.

Im a 19 year old (male) and was interested to know whether asymptomatic std's mean they dont affect you or that they do and they just dont show up?

Asymptomatic means that a person will be infected but will show no symptoms. Even though no symptoms are shown, the infection can still be passed on to their partner if no protection is used.
Chlamydia, Gonnorrhea and HIV are just a few STI's/STD's that can be asymptomatic.

I am a Motswana man of 3 years in a relationship. My partner is refusing to play it unprotected. Ive shown her that I am HIV negative. Is it because she is in a relationship with someone else?

There could be many reasons why your partner does not want to have unprotected sex.
She might not be on the contraceptive pill, so if she did have sex without a condom she would become pregnant.
She might have an STI/STD and doesn't feel that she can talk to you about it.
You should talk to her about this to put your mind at rest but ultimately it is her decision and you need to respect that.

Hi. I really want to have sexual intercourse but I dont want to ask a girl in case she doesnt want to and then she might go off telling her friends. What do I do?

It would probably be a good idea to wait until you are in a relationship with a girl before you think about having sex.
If you were to ask a girl straight out if she would have sex with you, you probably wouldnt get a good response.

Sometimes when my boyfriend sees me then he goes home he has kinda like cramps and it really hurts his balls, what would that be?

Any pain in the testicles can be a sign of infection or torsion and must be followed up by a doctor immediately to avoid longterm problems.

Is it normal for the foreskin to be pulled back when putting a condom on?

If you pull the foreskin back when putting on a condom you will maximise the free movement of the foreskin during sex, enhancing sensation. It is a personal preference as to whether you pull back the foreskin or not.

Hi, Im a 13 year old guy and my penis is 16cm erect. Is it possible to hurt someone on penetration. I have been having sex for about 7 months now and it hasnt happened yet...is it possible?

If you ensure your partner is aroused, take it slow, use lubricant and are not too rough you should be ok.

Hey, it takes me over 4 hours to cum and I dont use viagra or anything and my girlfriend is getting annoyed at me because of it. Is there anything I can do to speed things up? Or that she can do?

Make sure you are using plenty of lubricant - try the Four Seasons Ice lubricant. It contains menthol which may help to stimulate you more.
Make sure you are well aroused before you start penetration.
If it is becoming an issue for you and your partner, see your doctor for a check up.

When I get very horny or thinking about having sex or masturbate, my testicles/scrotum start to get low hanging more than usual. Can you tell me why and is it because my testicles start producing semen knowing I will ejaculate soon?

The testicles react to temperature. If you are cool they will move closer to the body to keep warm. If you are hot they will move away from the body. Your body heats up when you masturbate or are horny so this is most likely the reason why they are hanging low.

Im 18 yrs old and sometimes when I have an erection my penis and balls hurt, is there a problem? Also sometimes when Im sitting down, my testicles hurt.

Any pain can be a sign of infection. You should see your doctor for a check up.

Hey there, I have been with my girlfriend for a while now and am now finding it harder to get an erection and keep it. She doesnt often want foreplay and skips straight to the get go. And when I do get hard it can go quickly again. Are there any home remedies that can help us both out?

There may be an underlying issue. Are you worrying about how you will perform? Are you nervous, scared or worried about something?
Drugs (including some anti-depressants) and alcohol can also prevent you from getting and maintaining an erection. If you can keep an erection when you are by yourself, then you are probably worried about performing when you are with your partner. Perhaps you feel stressed to get on with it quickly and are not focussed on the tassk at hand.
Talk to your partner about your concerns and perhaps explain to her that you need foreplay.
If you cant figure out what is causing this, have a chat to your GP.

Since I was a baby Ive had one testicle! It really sucks and I'm very self-conscious about it and am afraid of what girls think! My penis works properly and the remaining testicle is fine but Im still worried! What should I do?

Talking about this with a partner before getting intimate may feel strange and risky. But it may be a good idea to mention it to avoid any embarrasing reactions. You could say something like 'I have one testicle, in case you haven't seen that before'.
A partner who truly cares will be supportive and understanding.

Hi, Im a 15 year old male and I think I might be bi but I do not want to be bi, I like women but a mate gave me head two days ago and I loved it.

Sexual experimentation at a young age is quite normal. It helps us to figure out who we are.
You are not alone in these feelings - there are probably a lot of gay, lesbian or bisexuals who have wished they weren't this way at some point in their lives, mostly and often only because the world we live in can still be so discriminatory and unfriendly towards being anything other than heterosexual.
Regardless, whether you are bi, gay or not, this isnt something you need to be worried about right now. Sexual orientation is something that tends to reveal itself over time.

Im 16 male, my penis is 13 cm long. I want to have sex with my girlfriend for the first time but im worried that it is too small and it wouldn't be able to penetrate her vagina. What should I do?

It doesn't matter how long or short your penis is because the vagina will accommodate itself to any length.
The vagina of a woman who hasn't had a child is only 7.5 cm long when she is not sexually excited. Even when aroused, a womans vagina usually only extends to a length of about 10cm.
The vagina has the most remarkable capacity for lengthening if something is introduced gradually.
Just take it slow, make sure your girlfriend is aroused and well lubricated.
And remember - it's not the length of your penis that counts, its how you use it.

Hi. Its great having sex without a condom. It feels great. However, once I use a condom I feel really different and it doesnt feel that good and for some reason at times, its very likely that I go soft when using the condom, any reason?

If you get used to the sensation of not using a condom then when it comes to using one, you will have decreased sensitivity.
Make sure the condom is a good fit - not too tight. Try the Four Seasons Naked condoms. They are ultra thin and are like not wearing a condom at all. Perhaps try a 'drop' of lubricant on the top of the penis before putting on the condom (not too much or the condom will slip off).
If you are not in a monogomous relationship the risks associated with unprotected sex can be deadly and will not feel good at all.

Me and my boyfriend have had sex a few times and his penis is not straight, what can he do?

It is quite normal for males to have a slight or even prominent penis curve. Penises can curve left, right or in any number of directions or angles.
Sometimes, the curve straightens out on its own over time. Others may never be perfectly straight, and thats ok too.
Only if your boyfriends erection is painful, has a severe bend, or causes discomfort during intercourse need he be concerned.

How often should the average 14 year old male masturbate a day/week?

Everyone is different and it is up to the individual as to how much they masturbate. It is a very normal thing to do. Just make sure you use some lubricant to avoid tearing and abrasions.

Hello, I am 15 and have never 'pulled back' my foreskin, have tried in the bath but had no luck, the 'hole' (not sure what it is called) just seems too small. I masturbate regularly but this is really stopping my confidence. I couldnt have intercourse/oral with a girl as I would feel extremely embarrassed. Is there any way I can get the skin to be softer or stretchier? As I said, I have tried water which helped a bit but still the 'hole' didnt go over 1cm wide. I would say Im pretty early into puberty as I have only started getting under arm hair the last few months. Could this be my problem, why I cant pull it back?

A tight foreskin is called phimosis. If you have phimosis, you will not be able to wash under your foreskin properly, so a white, cheesy material called smegma can accumulate. Also if the condition is severe, it may be painful when the penis is erect.
If it is very tight, there is no point in trying to force the foreskin back - you will only cause painful cracks on the inside of the foreskin, which will scar as they heal and make it worse.
As you are only 15 and just hitting puberty you can try to loosen the foreskin. Use plenty of lubricant and twice a day pull back the foreskin as far as it will go without pain and hold for about 5 minutes. Do not tear the foreskin. If this doesnt help you may have the other issues that you need to see a doctor about.

Im male and 16 years of age. I have been having sex with my girlfriend for 6 months or so now. I find that I lose my erection when I have a full or part full bladder. Is this normal?

I did some research on the net and there is not much discussed about this subject. Try to urinate before intercourse to alleviate any stress that this may cause you. If you develop any pain or continue to worry about this have a chat to your doctor.

1. Im 13 and I only have some pubic hairs, so how old do you have to be to get more pubic hairs?
2. And my penis is - when I have a boner its 10cm-12cm, is that normal size?

The penis usually starts to grow during puberty from 9-16 years of age and will continue to grow for up tp 4-6 years from the onset of puberty.
Everything you have described sounds normal as you are still young and have a few more years of growing to do.

Im 18 years old and I have a question about is it normal if my cock shows a lot of vein and on my scrotum I have a lot of vein as well, the difference is that one has a lot of red veins. Is it because I masturbate too much because after I masturbate I will feel pain when it is erected. Does that show any kind of disease or is it serious?

The veins you are describing sound quite normal as these veins direct blood to the penis which is needed to maintain erection.
Any sort of pain can signify infection or perhaps a twist in the veins. You should see your doctor to rule this out to avoid long term complications.

1. I have a girlfriend but sometimes I feel into boys more. Is that normal or considered as gay?
2. I am a 19yr old male and Im in a serious relationship with my girlfriend going on almost 2 years. I have had oral sex with a guy before, but never anal sex. I enjoy anal stimulation and have gay sex urges. What would you suggest I do?

It is very normal for people to experiment with their sexuality and to be curious about different types of partners. There are also many people who are considered bi-sexual because they enjoy sex with both males and females.
There is nothing wrong with you so long as you stay safe and are happy. Remember too that if you have a sexual experience with someone other than your partner you are cheating reguardless of the sex of that person.

Hi. I am planning for my first time. Does ejaculation have to be a large amount to be considered ejaculation? If there is a little bit, is it alright to continue having sex with the condom on? After ejaculation, if you want to have sex again, what is the right timing? Would straight away be fine or would there still be cum left over from previous ejaculation.

As soon as there is ejaculate in the condom it needs to be replaced with a new unused condom to prevent breakage and also to prevent the ejaculate leaking back out of the condom.
It is up to you and your partner to decide how long after ejaculation to resume sex again. It can take longer to get an erection and orgasm the second time.

When I have a bat in the shower I get head spins after I cum. Is that normal?

It is quite normal to feel this way after masturbating. Its like a mini workout so its normal to feel fatigued afterwards. As long as you are not fainting it should not be a problem. Also make sure the shower is not too hot.

After reading one of your questions and answers I believe I too have what you call sebaceous cysts. I am 17 and I am a virgin. What can I do for them to subside? Is there any self treatment or over the counter medicines I can get? I want seeing the doctor to be a last resort and is it possible if thats the case to see a doctor at my age with no parents or guardians as I am embarrassed and dont want anyone to find out. Im close with a girl at the moment and I want to engage in sexual activity but this is what is stopping me.

A sebaceous cyst is a closed sac occuring just under the skin which contains a 'pasty' or 'cheesy' looking substance. A foul odour is often present in the substance called keratin which fills the cysts. They are often caused as a result of swollen hair follicles, or skin trauma.
Sebaceous cysts are usually easily diagnosed by their appearance to the trained eye. In some cases, a biopsy may be necessary to rule out other conditions with a similiar appearance.
Sebaceous cysts most often disappear on their own and are not dangerous. Occasionally, they may become inflamed and tender. Sometimes they grow large and may interfere with your everyday life.
You could just be patient and wait until the lumps subside, otherwise you can go to a sexual health clinic to have the lumps examined to ensure that it is not something more serious.

Im a young man that loves sex and I get it quite regularly but when I have sex I notice, no matter what, I alwsy cum fast. I tried changing positions, I tried putting my mind on something else. Nothing can stop me from cumming quick. What suggestions do you have that may help me last longer?

Try using a Four Seasons Extra Strength condom. They are thicker than a normal condom, developed for sustained enjoyment.
If this does not help you should see your doctor as there are many products available if this is becoming an issue for you and your partner.

Im a 14 year old male and I have a small penis. It is only about 10cm erected. What can I do?

The penis usually starts to grow during puberty from 9-16 years of age and will continue to grow for up to 4-6 years from the onset of puberty.
I wouldnt be too worried at this stage as you are still young and have quite a few more years of growing to go.

Im 14 and I think my penis is an average size (12cm) erect but I still worry about what the girl is gonna think. What should I do to stop worrying?

As you are still quite young your penis may still be growing for a few more years. Its not soemthing you should be worring about at your age - when the time comes you will learn that there is more to pleasing a woman than just penis size.

I am a 25yr old male. The first time when I do sex with my girlfriend it just takes 2 minutes to get finished but when I do it a 2nd or 3rd time it takes more than 30 minutes. Is it fine or should I see the doctor?

This is quite common. Unless it is worrying both you and your girlfriend you dont really need to see a doctor. Try some more foreplay first and try not to stress about it.

Ive got 9 cysts on my right testie, not painful but my testie has doubled in size. Can this affect fertility?

If you haven't already seen a doctor you should do so ASAP. It would probably depend on what type of cysts they are. Are you sure they arent torsions which can affect the blood supply to the testicle.
You also have 1 unaffected testie so this would be to your advantage.

I used to have sex with my girlfriend once or twice a week at the best, she wasn't interested in her orgasm but she is happy to play with me to help me reach mine. At that time I used to masturbate 2-4 times a day. Last few weeks we tried experimenting by me not touching or having any orgasm for a week. I am allowed to reach orgasm one day per week. We both absolutley love it, she teases me all the time and she wants orgasms every day now with oral sex performed on her, I am a different man now she wants me to hold even longer, she wants to move me on 10 days. A few days after holding I am so focused and energized that is crazy, I love it, I feel so confident. And being constantly horny puts me in a weird state of mind. I am just a little moody the first few days.
For how long is it OK to go without orgasm for men? My friends told me I am going to get cancer in my balls if I keep all that semen but I love being in that state of mind, what should I do?

If you are onto a good thing, stick with it. You are obviously really enjoying this new experience. As long as you arent experiencing any pain or cramps in your testicles. Id say your friends are just jealous or unsure about your new found joy. There has been some suggestion that more frequent ejaculation may reduce the risk of prostate cancer, but there is no proof that not ejaculating causes cancer.

My erection goes down, not up. Its hard as a rock but, is this a problem? I dont seem to have any problems pleasuring my girlfriend in sex though.

An erect penis can vary in angle greatly within a wide range of what is considered "normal".
You seem to get a hard erection and dont have any issues with pleasuring your girlfriend so it seems there is nothing to worry about.

Is it possible to get STD's and STI's from not having any kind of sex?

STDs/STIs are Sexually Transmitted Diseases/Infections. This means they can be transmitted through vaginal intercourse, oral sex and anal sex. A person may be infected and may potentially infect others, without showing signs of disease. Some STI's can also be transmitted via use of an IV drug needle if its used by an infected person as well as through childbirth or breastfeeding.

Hey I'm 17 (male) and when I masturbate I dont have an orgasm is there something wrong with me?

Both men and women can have difficulty reaching orgasm, although its more common among women. For many people it takes practise. Masturbation helps people figure out what feels good and helps them build tension towards orgasm. Concentration for orgasm vary for everyone. Some find it helpful to be in the moment and focus on sensations, feelings and intensity, rather than worry about the anticipated result. You may want to try to relax and enjoy the experience instead of concentrating too hard on reaching orgasm. Make sure you are in an environment where you are not worried about being caught or interrupted as this may add to you tension.

Im 15 and I was having sex with my girlfriend I was wearing a condom but after I cumed we kept going and there was a wet patch on the bed, Im not sure if it was from her or me because there wasnt much cum left in the condom. If there is any chance what are the odds of her being pregnant..if she is I'm dead!

Once you ejaculate into a condom and you decide to keep thrusting, the condom should be replaced with a new un-used one as it is more likely to break and there is a chance that the ejaculate will leak out of the condom and into the vagina area. If your girlfriend was underneath you or on her back then the wet patch could just be her natural lubrication, but there is a chance that the ejaculate leaked back out of the condom. You girlfriend should do a pregnancy test to see if she is pregnant. There is always the option of "morning after contraception" to be considered. If you are open to this, the morning after pill usually needs to be taken within 72 hours.

Me and my girlfriend have just decided to give each other oral sex, and I've noticed that sometimes her fluids are white, and other times it's clear. I'd much rather go down on her when it's clear. Is there a reason that it may be white or a certain time when it is? Also, does the fluid have taste, if so what does it taste like?

Vaginal tastes and secretiona will vary from woman to woman and on the time of their cycle. Certain medications can affect the amount of natural lubrication. Also certain foods can affect the taste. Maybe you both could have a bath or shower before having oral sex so that she can clean the vaginal area with warm water - not with soap as this can affect the PH balance.

Im almost 16 and after I masturbate there is white stuff on my foreskin. What is it and how can I get rid of it?

It is most likely to be smegma. Smegma is produced by the body to lubricate the foreskin. It can also be a build up of old skin cells, dirt and semen. Masturbating probably pushes the smegma to the top of the penis where it is visible to you.
When having a shower pull the foreskin back and clean thouroughly around the head of the penis to remove the smegma.

My girlfriend and I are having sex 4 times or more (if possible) a day without a condom, but it was because shes on the pill. Isnt that too much for us to have that much of sex in one day and are we exposure to the risk of getting things?

Have you both been checked for STI's? Are you in a monogamous relationship? No contraception is 100% effective against pregnancy and STI's. Having sex a lot is not bad for you as long as you take all the appropriate precautions. For a continued long term relationship, it is also important to base your relationship on other things such as respect (are you both wanting sex this many times a day), common interests and values.

A couple of months ago I was diagnosed with depression and prescribed zoloft, ever since taking zoloft I have trouble getting and maintaining an erection.

All medications have side effects and anit-depressants can contribute to a wide range of sexual issues. Talk it over with your doctor who may prescribe a different anti-depressant or other treatment.

I am a 37 year old male wondering are there any products I can take to lift libido.

There are many products on the market that claim to increase libido, you can talk to your pharmacists or doctor about which ones may be helpful to you. There are also some foods that can help as well. Try celery, raw oysters, bananas, avocado, almonds, eggs, liver, figs, garlic and chocolate as these all contain natural vitamins and minerals.

I am keen on building some muscle, so was wondering if sex or masturbation affects the growth of muscles?

Having sex and masturbating will not stop you from building muscle. If you do it enough it will probably help to build muscle - in 1 arm at least.

I am 14 and one of my nuts hangs lower than the other, is this right or is there something wrong?
My testies are not the same, one is bigger than the other, is that normal?

As with most body parts, feet, breasts, hands, no two are exactly the same size and this is quite normal. Keep an eye on it and if one gets larger or smaller over time then you should have them checked out. If you have any redness or pain see a doctor ASAP.
If one is hanging lower then the other it's probably due to temperature. They are usually higher when it is cold to keep warm and lower when hot to keep cool.

Hi I'm male and I have contracted scabies. I know its only a skin bug but people say it can cause STD's, is this possible?

Scabies cannot cause an STD. Scabies is classed as an STI as it can be transmitted through skin to skin contact. As long as you are treating this infection it should not become a problem.
Have a look on our website under the 'Sex Stuff' tab under Sexual Health then click on STI/STD Info. There is some information about scabies and other infections and diseases.

Hi. I'm just curious about herpies. I believe you can only get infected once the symptoms come up. I read on your std test that the symptoms can appear at any time which is why best wear a condom. Does a condom protect completely from herpies (or other infections). Can it spread from outside the vaginal or penis area? Are most diseases spread just from discharge itself? I'm just curious as it is a little scary the thought of catching stds, especially if I don't know that much about it.

It is great that you are aware of STD's and are taking the time to research and understand the risks.
Your best protection against STI's/STD's is to always use a condom including during oral sex as herpes can be transmitted from a cold sore to the genital area and visa versa.
If you haven't already, take a look on our website on the 'sex stuff' tab under sexual health and click on the STI/STD Info tab. We have listed all the different types of STD's and STI's - their symptoms and treatments.

I am 16 and me and my girlfriend of 11 months started having sex a couple of months ago. Sometimes when we have sex I last forever (45mins-60mins) and other times I last only 15 mins. What is the reason for this? Is it normal?

Everyone is different. Some people can last for ages while others may only last a few minutes.
The circumstances leading up to sex may have been different. Maybe you were turned on more when you didn't take so long. More foreplay may be needed if you don't want to take so long. If this doesn't work and it concerns you, consult you GP. You could also try using a bit more lubricant.
Have a chat to your girlfriend and ask her if the time you take affects her in any way.

I am 14 and I masturbate a lot and I have thought that it might be too much or something, how often should I do it and what is the average time for masturbation. Also I am not sure really how to have sex and I am worried that when I do Im going to have to ask how to do it. I am very worried.

There is nothing wrong with masturbating. It is a very natural thing to do. You can do it as much as you like.
There is no average time for masturbating. Everyone is different, some people might take a while and others could be very quick.
There is a first time for everything and when the time comes to have sex just go with the flow. It should come naturally. If you have a read through some of the other questions and answers you may be able to pick up some tips.

I am 14, I have just started to have sex and the regular ones are a bit too big. What should I go for?

Try the Four Seasons Tighter fitting condoms. On our website on the 'Sex Survey' tab there is a section where you can complete your measurements to see when you may need to move up to the regular size.

I cant blow when my girlfriend gives me head, is something wrong with me? And how do you know when your girlfriend cums?

There could be many reasons why this is happening. Are you able to orgasm when you masturbate or when having sex?
Maybe you need to find out what feels good and makes you orgasm and then guide her through it.
It would be hard to tell when your girlfriend orgasms, as different woman can show different signs eg. movement, faster breathing, moaning etc.

What age do I have to be to buy condoms?

There is no recommended age for buying condoms. It is just up to the discretion of the shop keeper. Try buying them from a large supermarket to avoid any issues or embarrassment.

I'm 26 and been with my fiance for 11 years and she's never had sex with anyone apart from myself. I only had a few partners before her and when we have sex I am always thinking about someone else having sex with her. Ive asked her if she would be interested in a threesome and she said she was. Is this normal for me and her to be thinking this way?

It is definatley normal for you and your partner to be thinking this way. Lots of couples consider threesomes these days.
You have been with your partner for a long time so you need to talk about how having a threesom would affect your relationship. She may get jealous seeing you touch another woman or you may even get a bit jealous.
If you have a strong relationship and it is something that both of you want to take part in then go for it.

Hey, Im 17 and after having sex for a while (45 mins-1.5 hrs) my right testicle really hurts. Whats going on there and should I get it checked out?

The testicles are very sensitive, and even a minor injury can cause pain or discomfort. However, ongoing pain/discomfort should not be ignored. If the pain is worrying you, you should see your doctor to have it checked out and rule out anything serious.

Does masturbating make your balls smaller?

There is nothing to suggest it does.

Im 15 and am using a large condom...the regular ones only go half way and I have to stop having sex every couple of minutes to see if its still on, the larger one is much better. I've got 2 questions....
1. What are the size ranges for the condoms size? (if I have an 18cm penis what condom should I use?)
2. I really want to make my girlfriend cum. I've gotten close a few times but she pulls out..my question is, where else besides the internet can I buy stud condoms?
3. My girlfriend and I had sex after I started fingering her and this warm clear liquid came out of her..twice..did she cum or what is it?

1. Four Sesons Condoms come in 3 sizes -Tighter fitting 49mm, Regular fitting 54mm & Larger fitting 59mm. We recommend that you keep using the Larger fitting condoms if you feel these better suit you. On our website on the "sex survey" tab you can enter your size and you will get an indication of the size we recommend. You need to put in you circumference also to get an accurate reading.
2. You will find the Four Seasons Studded & Ribbed condoms in any Priceline store.
3. The clear liquid could just be her natural lubrication. Woman can vary greatly in the amount they produce and some woman can even "ejaculate".

I'm 16 and have a girlfriend of 11 months and as straight as a nail. I recently went round to a mates place with some other friends for a night of beer and movies. After we had finished a few movies, the last one being a porno, they all decided to strip down and told me to do the same. Once I had, one of them started giving me head and the rest started doing the same and it was the best head I'd had. Then when I was finished the biggest load ever, nearly 3 times the usual with my girlfriend. What would be the reason for this?

It is not uncommon for young people to experiment sexually. Perhaps you had such a great orgasm because you were doing something risky, new and exciting.
You need to decide for yourself if it is appropriate to continue with this sort of behaviour. Are you cheating on your girlfriend? Do you want to continue?

How effective are condoms in preventing Aids and STI? I have noted that when having sex with the woman on top position. Vaginal fluids flow out and soaks the man's balls down to the bed. Surely this can transmit STI and aids virus because of the fluids.
Can you please highlight on this issue.

Blood born viruses such as HIV and Hepatitis can only be transmitted by blood to blood contact so unless you had an open sore the chances of contracting these diseases is minimal.

Im 16 and my boyfriend is 17 we have been having sex for almost a year now, but every time we do he cums early and we only last about 5 or so minutes...Is there anything I can do to help him with his problem cause I really know it hurts him???

It is quite common for men to ejaculate within 2 minutes of thrusting. There are a few things your boyfriend can try to stop this happening. He can try using a thicker condom such as the Four Seasons Extra Strength condom. Or he could try masturbating an hour or so prior to sexual intercourse as this will relax him and will be ready to last longer.
If sex is leaving you unsatisfied you could ask him to provide more foreplay until you are on the brink or have orgasmed before penetration.

I have met a 16yr old girl and started going out with her. Im 21 m and would like to know what is the law on sex laws with her? Is it illegal to go out with her or just to have sex with her?

Whilst it varies from state to state, the most common age of consent for sex in Australia is 16. We dont believe it is illegal to go out with her, so long as you are not having any sex with her, this may include oral and anal.
We did come across a Victorian website that says - if you are between 10 and 16 the law says a person cannot have sex with you if they are more than 2 years older than you, even if you agree - http://www.fpv.org.au/2_5_3.html

I'm 19 years old and have been with my girlfriend for two and a half years and lately I've been having trouble when it comes to actual intercourse. I find that I am aroused but when it gets to sex I seem to lose it a bit and I want to have sex and so does she, I'm findng it all a bit frustrating and I think there are times when I am hard but think about things too much. We've spoken about it and she's alright as she can bare with it. Sometimes it happens and sometimes it doesn't. What can I do?

Do you have extra stresses at the moment? Are you experimenting with drugs or alcohol? These things can affect your body.
If not spend more time on foreplay and try to relax and not focus on losing your erection. Concentrate your attention on pleasing your girlfriend and not on what your penis is doing.
If you find yourself getting soft ask your girlfriend to stimulate your penis with her hands, breasts or mouth before penetration.
Try using some Four Seasons Ice Lubricant for extra sensation.

Im a 15 year old male and my girlfriend and I have had sex a number of times, last week she said to me that she was pregnant but I have always put a condom on. Could I still be the father?

Four Seasons condoms when used properly are highly effective against pregnancy - although no contraceptive can guarantee 100% effectiveness.
You need to talk to our girlfriend and find out if she has been with anyone else. If not, then you are most likely the father.
You would be best to talk to her about seeing a doctor about the options to be considered. As you are very young, you would both be best to talk to your parents about what is happening, they may be shocked at first but would hopefully be supportive. If you are still concerned about whether you are the father, you can have a paternity test after the baby is born.

1. Ive been having sex with my 19 year old girlfriend for 6 months now, but not regularly. She doesn't seem to enjoy it much and only seems to do it because I want to, I was her first and she has never experienced an orgasm. I tried using a vibrator also and she told me it was doing nothing for her, Im not a 1 minute wonder either, I went for 45 mins with her and still nothing. I dont know what else to try or do to make her want to have sex for her enjoyment aswell.

2. I'm 16, my girlfriend and I have just started to have sex although she doesnt seem to enjoy it, but when I ask her she says she does. Do you have any tips on how I can please her?

All women are different. Some can orgasm from penetration while others need clitoral stimulation. Try using some Four Seasons Arouse gel on your girlfriends clitoris to see if she can orgasm that way.
Have a read through some of the other questions and answers regarding this topic. There are a few tips on pleasing your partner in the Womens health section.

Hey, I'm 42 and my 12 year old boy was wondering how old it is recommended to be before you consider sex?

Whilst it varies from state to state, the most common age of consent for hetrosexual sex in Australia is 16 and homosexual sex is 18. There is no "recommended" age to consider sex as everybody matures at different rates and each individual needs to decide for themselves when they are ready not only to have sex but also to deal with any possible consequences such as pregnancy or infection.
It is great that you and your son are open to discussing sex. Being open about contraception and protection against diseases and also being able to discuss respecting and pleasing your partner will go a long way to preparing him for when the time comes.

How can a penis get damaged and if it is damaged then does it stop growing?

We have already answered similiar questions to this. If you scroll down the page towards the bottom you will find a few questions and answers on damage to penises.

Does masturbating a lot affect an erection. I masturbate at least once a day but it doesnt stay hard when I have sex and nothing happens.

There is no evidence that frequent masturbation has an affect on getting an erection. As you get older, your ability to get an erection and masturbate daily may change. When you masturbate you are in control and do only what feels best and intense. When you are with a partner the sensations are different and perhaps less intense and things may take a little longer to get going. Next time you masturbate, try doing it in a different way and vary the intensity with different grips etc so you are not used to only getting an erection with one sensation.

What are better - circumcised or ones with foreskin?

One is not necessarily better than the other. In Western cultures, there is a distinct move away from non-religious circumcision. There is a bit of a misconception that circumcised penises are cleaner than non-circumcised penises but this is not the case if the penis is washed and cared for properly.
The tip of an uncircumcised penis may be more sensitive than a circumcised one as it is used to having its own protective cover. Also, non-circumcisedd penises have their own natural lubricant.
It all comes down to personal preference and as always, knowing how to use what you have.

I have anal sex but is there a way to have an empty bowel without not eating? I am a chef so I have to eat at work so there is no way around it.

You need to try and have a bowel movement before anal sex to have an empty bowel. Try taking a warm bath or shower first to loosen things up. If you find it is still difficult to empty your bowel then you could try making sure you eat a diet high in fibre, drink plenty of water or even take a laxative.
There is a bit of a debate about the benefits of using an enema to clean and empty the bowel. It is certainly not necessary but for those who are inexperienced or concerned about the cleanliness of anal sex it may be helpful.
You can buy packages that come with a chemical solution but may want to discard the solution and just use warm water (around body temperature). Once you have squirted the warm water into your rectum, wait a few minutes and then sit on the toilet and hopefully you will have a bowel movement. You can use this method after your bowel movement for cleaning also.
Just remember that if you use an enema, it will also remove any natural lubrication you had, so make sure you really lube up.

I am 19 and have a 17cm long penis. I have found that when I have sex with different girls they cant take my whole length due to the fact that it hurts them. This is where I pull out and find out if they are ok. Is it a curse to have a long penis?

It is not what you have but what you do with it that counts.
The average length of a vagina is approx 10cm in an unaroused woman. As a woman becomes aroused, the vagina expands to allow penetration of a penis.
Perhaps you need to spend more time on making sure your partner is fully aroused before penetration. You may also need to learn to control your thrusting by starting off slowly and building up to a deeper thrusting.
As you get older and the women you have sex with get older and more experienced the issues you have will probably decrease. Do you have a thick penis also? As you may need extra lubrication if this is the case.

Can a man have a normal sex life after a vasectomy?

Vasectomay does not affect your hormones, orgasm or ejaculation so there is no reason for it to have a negative impact on your sex life.
Many couples have found greater sexual freedom once they no longer have the worry of an unplanned pregnancy.
A vasectomy does not protect you from STI's so if you are not in a monogamous relationship you will still need to use a condom.

Why do my ball sack hang?

The function of the scrotum is to keep the testicles away from the body so they can be at just the right temperature for sperm production, which is a little lower that normal body tmeperature. When it is cold out, or if a man goes swimming or takes a cold shower, the scrotum brings the testicles closer to the body for more warmth.
Also, when a guy is frightened, the scrotum tightens up to keep the testicles close to the body for maximum protection. The scrotum also moves closer to the body when a man is sexually aroused and has an erection.

I am looking to buy condoms which are hypo-allergenic. I find I react to spermacide and I think my husband does too. Can you suggest a condom which would be comfortable for both of us?

No Four Seasons Condoms contain a spermacide as we don't believe this is the best health choice for our customers.
It may be that you actually have a latex allergy/intolerance. If this is the case you would react not only to condoms but also items like latex/rubber gloves. If you think this is the case then avoid using latex products as sometimes this type of allergy progresses and can become quite serious. There are some other responses on the website that give more detailed information about the symptoms of latex allergies.

I have a problem with early ejaculation. Whenever I start intercourse I ejaculate after 1 or 2 minutes. I have Spinal Stenosis in my spine on L4 and L5. What is the cure?

Your early ejaculation issues may be a symptom of the Spinal Stenosis as this can affect bodily functions such as sexual function, bowl and bladder function.
If you have had a diagnosis from a doctor then he/she will be able to best advise on the type of treatment that is best for you. Normally, treatment would start with oral medications or injections. As this problem is normally caused from arthritis it can be degenerative and may progressively get worse when surgery may be an option.

I am a 18yr old male and the only thing I have done is pash. My good friend has done way more than me and I am getting really jealous. I do have a small penis but would really like to have sex or touch a vagina. Can you help me get some?

I can't really help you get some but I can give you some advice. Don't compare yourself to other people as everyone developes and progresses at different rates - this will be true throughout your whole life, learn to be happy with yourself and work on changing and improving yourself not competing with others.
As far as furthering your sexual experience, I think this will come in time. Try to be a bit more outgoing with girls and take an interest in them to build a relationship first. Don't be in such a rush, you still have plenty of time.

I am 17yr old guy. Is it a good idea to keep condoms in your wallet? Or will it damage the condom or increase the risk of the condom failing?

It is certainly not a good idea to store condoms in your wallet for extended periods as you risk deterioration and perforation. If you thought you may need one tonight you could always keep one there just in case but then replace it next time if it wasn't used. Always check the foil for any ripping or punctures prior to use. NEVER FOLD THE CONDOM OR SCRUNCH IT UP.
Four Seasons have released four different coloured tins (white, black, blue & pink) which are perfect for storing condoms ready for use at any time. You could keep them in a bag, pocket or the glove box of your car (not for too long as the temperature inside of cars will derteriorate the condom especially in summer).

I have been having feelings about my girlfriend’s mum while having sex. If I don’t think about her I cant ejaculate. Can you help please?

Fantasizing about other people during sex is quite a common and normal thing to do. It becomes a problem when it starts to interfere with you functioning normally, ie not being able to ejaculate. Perhaps try weaning yourself off this fantasy, by thinking about someone else or just concentrating on your girlfriend.
Perhaps try to think about your girlfriends mother logically – would you actually want a real relationship with her?? Would you want to take on the responsibilities of children, mortgage or perhaps splitting up a marriage. What about in 10 years we she is so much older than you. Perhaps by thinking in these terms you will realize that it is just a fantasy and will be able to move on.

I’m 22 and I’ve had enough sex to know what it feels like. I have never had a girlfriend as I just never wanted one. Recently a girl asked me out and I liked her a lot and we ended up have sex one night – I only last for 2 mins? And I usually go for a lot longer than that. Afterwards I was shivering and felt really weird and that never happens!! Is there something wrong with me?

I don’t think there is anything wrong with you. Perhaps it had been a little while since you had been with a girl or perhaps with a girl that you really liked. You may have just had a little freakout. Don’t put too much pressure on yourself, see what happens next time. You may be a little scared of commitment and this had a physical effect on you. If this continues to happen and you have more physical symptoms, see a doctor.

If a person masturbates very often is it possible for him to run out of sperm?

This is not very likely in the long run. You may experience an issue if you are masturbating for hours on end but after a rest the sperm will be back.
Warning: Dont try this as a contraceptive method - always catch those babies in a Four Seasons Condom.

I am concerned about these lumps on my penis. They are fatty like cysts but are not painful. They have been there for a while and are not subsiding. When squeezed, thin strands of a yellow substance come out. I am a virgin.

It sounds as though these are sebaceous cysts which can be quite common on the penis. You should not be popping or picking at these as they can become infected.
If these become sore, infected or you are concerned in any way about them, you should seek the advice of a doctor for diagnosis and treatment.

I am 16 and still a virgin and so is my girlfriend. I am quick to cum when I masturbate, is it just because it's the way I do it to myself? Will it be the same when I have sex with her for the first time?

Sometimes, people can orgasm faster when they masturbate because they know exactly where the right spot is every time. Your first time with a partner may go one of two ways.
You will either be so excited and turned on that you will cum very quickly so make sure your condom is on early. This shouldn't be a problem if you continue to take the time to pleasure and stimulate her - you never know you may be up to a second time by then (just remember to use a new condom).
The other way you may go is to be so tense and worried about "doing it wrong" that you may have difficulty reaching an orgasm. Try to make things as relaxed and comfortable for you and her as possible and make sure you both are fully aroused before you try penetration.
Always use a Four Seasons Condom and be sure to keep the free water based lubricant from the pack handy just in case she needs a little bit extra lubrication (do not under any circumstances use petroleum jelly such as Vaseline as this can weaken the condom).

Me (male) and my boyfriend tried "FROT" last night, what chance do I have of getting an STI. When my boyfriend cums in my anus, it leaks out as soon as I stand up, is this normal?

Any sexual contact without a condom can lead to the transmission of STIs.
I will assume by FROT that you are talking about two men rubbing against each other without penetration to orgasm. Without a condom you run the risk of transferring herpes or warts.
You are obviously not using a condom for anal penetration if the cum is leaking out when you stand up and this leaves you vulnerable to HIV, hepatitis, ghonorreah etc. The anus muscles can still be stretched or weakened after penetration and therefore it is quite normal that the semen could leak out.

My girlfriend has really good vaginal muscle control and during sex she squeezes down pretty hard on my penis sometimes. This feels good at the time, but leaves me a bit sore afterwards. Is there any harm being done to my penis? Do I need to be concerned with the condom being pulled off or being damaged?

Obviously your girlfriend does have very good muscle control as this can be a tricky thing to do - perhaps she is also squeezing her thighs together.
Like anything, all in moderation. If you are feeling pain, perhaps see if she can back off for a bit. Always be a bit careful when thrusting that you don't do some damage to your penis if it slips out and the muscles are too tense for you to slip back in easily.
If you are still thrusting whilst she is squeezing her muscles then you do run a real risk of the condom slipping off or possibly being damaged during this time. Always stop thrusting and hold onto the condom around your penis before withdrawing to ensure that the condom stays on the penis during withdrawal.

Can a penis break?

It would be very hard to actually snap off a penis into 2 parts but you can certainly 'break' a penis.
Whilst there are no actual bones in a penis, you can damage the soft spongy tissue which can cause extreme pain, discolouration and swelling. This can occur when using excessive force to thrust or for example if the woman is on top and the penis slips out and thrusting continues.
If this occurs you need to seek treatment IMMEDIATLEY as complications with the uretha and other possible consequences such as misshapenness may require surgey to fix.

Hello, I am wondering how I can get my girlfriend to have sex with me. She is a virgin but is kinky and wants to try it, but how should I say lets do it?

You should be honest with her and tell her that you would like to step things up a bit. Explain to her that you respect her and will be respectful of her when sharing this time together.
You need to remember though, that this is, ultimately, your girlfriends decision. You cannot force her to do something she doesnt want to do and you need to listen to her and respect her feelings without pressuring her.

I am a male (15) I dont masturbate and last night my girlfriend and I had sex for the first time. After 1 and a half hours I still hadnt orgasmed. Whats up with that?

This is not uncommon as you may have been feeling anxious about the first time.
If you are uncircumsized try pulling your foreskin back before applying a condom as this will give you more contact on your most sensitive parts.
Dont be so hard on yourself, see how you go next time, you should only have concerns if this is a longterm issue.

My girlfriend and I have been together for over a year. I have not yet managed to get an erection and when we try to have sex I tell her that I have pains. Is it possible to have sex with a flaccid penis? Is it normal not to get an erection? Please help - its causing problems in our relationship!

I would suggest that you see your doctor for a thorough physical. There can be many reasons that you are not getting an erection and it would be better for you to seek treatment to help you have a fulfilling sex life.
In the meantime, explain to your girlfiend that it is not to do with her and that you find her very sexy. There are many ways that you can pleasure her without penetration such as oral sex, manual stimulation or toys.

I am 28 male. Often after sex I feel a slight irritation (a burning sensation as if I want to pee) in my penis. Would there be any medical problems?

You may have an allergy or an infection and really should see a doctor for diagnosis just in case.

I am 17, I haven't had sex yet. When I get an erection, my penis bends to the left. When ever I get an erection laying down I push it to the right to try and straighten it out. Can that lead to any problems? Why is it doing that?

When a penis is erect it can lean to either the right or the left and this is quite normal.
If your penis is actually bent or abnormally shaped you may have Peyronie's Disease. This is caused by the formation of scar tissue or plaque build up in the penis shaft. This forces the soft tissue of the penis to bend around the hardened spot when erect, resulting in a bent shape. The root cause of the scar tissue or plaque build up is unknown, but it can be corrected.
You would be best to talk to your doctor to discuss a diagnosis and treatment options.

Hi. I am 16 year old male. I was wondering if it's normal to have a little clear ball come out when I ejaculate. Whenever I masturbate the little clear balls come out with my sperm. Is this normal?

Semen varies from man to man and these little clear balls can be quite normal and should be nothing to worry about. Your semen can vary depending on your diet, general health, temperature, stress etc.

I had sex the other night with my girlfriend and after we finished and I took the condom off, I noticed that my penis had two graze like cuts on it that have scabbed over. I was wondering what may have caused this and can it be dangerous?

Recently my girlfriend tied me up and had sex with me and I think she pushed something in and out of the end of my penis as it has been sore for a day now, should I wait and see what happens or should see a doctor?

We have grouped these two questions together as the response is similar.
During sexual intercourse both men and women can experience small tears and abrasions and if this occurs can cause stinging (especially if urine gets on them) and possibly scabbing. If these do not clear up within a day or two or if you experience discharge or severe pain, you need to visit a doctor for a diagnosis.
With scabbing, it would be best to make sure the scabs are covered by a condom or cleared up before sexual contact occurs just in case they are from an STI.

You said to keep pool and spa water separate from sex. My girlfriend and I are quite adventurous and are considering having sex in the sea. We'd use a condom naturally, but does salt water provide any negative effects?

One of the reasons we recommend not having sex in water, if you need to wear a condom for protection, is that any type of water washes away you natural or applied lubricant which causes additional friction. This friction can weaken the condom and cause breakage.
This friction can also cause small abrasions which can leave you more vulnerable to infection.

I am male (16) and my girlfriend told me she wants to have sex with me but I am worried for her sake, she has never been penetrated, she is not keen on me fingering her and she has never been fingered, not even by herself. I spoke to her about other possible things beside straight out sex, but she is not keen and finds it yuck. I think it is important to do other physical sexual things before sex, not only for our relationship but for her as I think sex will hurt her a lot and I dont want to put her through the pain. Any tips.

Firstly, there are a few other questions that we have already answered on sexual intercourse for the first time and these will give you some tips on making the experience as pleasurable as possible for your girlfriend.
I think the main issue here is your feelings about it. You dont say whether you are a virgin also or are not very experienced and if this is the case you may be a little concerned about hurting her because of your inexperience.
You need to decide whether you are ready to have sex with your girlfriend at this time. You can choose not to if you are not ready and wait until you are both ready.
You obviously care about your girlfriend very much and this is a big step in showing her respect and ensuring that she does not have a bad experience.
Just remember to respect each other, take it slow, use lots of lubricant and always use protection.

One of my balls is bigger than the other - Is this normal or is there something wrong?

As with most body parts, feet, breasts, hands - no two are exactly the same size and this is quite normal. Keep an eye on it and if one gets larger or smaller over time then you should have them checked out. If you have any redness or pain, see a doctor ASAP.

I am 15 and when I masturbate I cum, but it doesnt shoot out, it just drips out. If I wank up to 5 minutes later nothing comes out.

As you are still quite young, your body may not be fully developed from puberty yet. Normally when you ejaculate it is normal for cum to squirt out as it helps the sperm to move closer to the egg for fertilisation. If over the next year or so, your cum still drips out or you have other issues, you would be best to see a doctor to get things checked out.
Your body does need a down time before it can ejaculate again. Usually, 20 minutes plus, would allow you to have another erection and be able to ejaculate.

When I get and erection the shaft of my penis gets hard but the head doesnt. Is this normal?

This sounds quite normal. The shaft will get hard as it fills with blood to maintain the erection. The head will become firmer but may not be solid and remain spongy.

We get a lot of questions about men and the timing of ejaculation. Here are some tips.

It is quite common for men to ejaculate within 2 minutes of thrusting.
Some men can take considerably longer than this due to factors such as stress, alcohol or an underlying condition. If you are taking longer to orgasm during pentration than is suitable for you or your partner you can try receiving extra foreplay - including oral stimulation - to ensure you are really ready before penetration. Try a small amount (just a drop or two) of lubricant on the head of the penis before putting on a condom and this can give you an additional sensation and if not circumsized pull back the foreskin before putting on a Four Seasons Condom.
Some men can take considerably shorter than this which can often leave partners feeling less than satisfied. If this is the case then ensure your partner receives additional foreplay and is on the brink, or has orgasmed, before penetration. You can try using a thicker condom such as the Four Seasons Extra Strength Condom. The mind is one of the biggest sexual organs so try to distract it by thinking about something else. If the issue is a short term one, you could try masturbating to cum an hour or so prior to sexual intercourse and your body may be a little more relaxed and ready to last longer.
When it comes down to it, some of these suggestions may help but if you or your partners sex life is negatively affected by these issues then you should consider getting a check up by your GP. There are a lot of treatments out there so dont suffer any longer.

LARGER PENIS SIZES

We have received a number of questions from both men and women concerned with a large penis causing pain and discomfort to a woman. The main thing to remember here is that, under the right conditions, vaginas are designed to stretch (no penis will be bigger than a baby being born).

These are some tips to help-

1. Use lots of lubricant - both on the condom/penis and the vagina opening. This is no time for friction.

2. Arousal - making sure she is really aroused will help with penetration.

3. Go slowly - the vagina opening will need to stretch out gently to allow the penis to enter. Just like any muscles, this will get easier with time and patience.

Start off by just inserting the penis (top only) a short way in and perhaps leaving there for a few seconds and pulling back slightly (do not come out) and then moving in a bit further. Listen to her and make sure she is not in pain (just a pulling feeling). If you hurt or tear her now she will close up and be less receptive next time. Do not thrust in and out especially if the penis comes out of the vagina.

Your partner needs to keep breathing deliberatley and consciously relaxing to avoid clenching.

You may be able to penetrate your whole penis inside her the first few times, just build up to it slowly. Until her body accepts you fully, you are best with the missionary position to start off with using slow shallow penetration.

I am a 21 year old straight man and I have a girlfriend. Once when having a massage by a good looking male masseur he asked if I would like him to suck my dick at the end. I agreed and had a tip top orgasm, like I have never had with a woman. I went for another massage a month later and this time he asked me to have sex with him so I did and it was fantastic. Now I have this strong urge to have sex with gay guys but prevent myself doing that as I am totally straight. I do not know why I enjoy doing males and females, most of the time I think something is wrong with me, is there? Is there anything that I can do to forget about having sex with gay men as I would like to get a tip top orgasm with my girlfriend.

You seem to be feeling quite confused about your sexuality and this can be normal for someone your age. Experimenting is quite common for young people and helps them establish who they are. Some stay straight, some are gay and some are bisexual (enjoy sex with both men and women). There is nothing wrong with you and you need to learn to accept yourself and your sexuality. Perhaps you had such a great orgasm because you were doing something naughty and risked getting caught. You could try doing something a little bit more risky with your girlfriend. If you still have these feelings of guilt and confusion talk to a counsellor who can help you deal with it.

During foreplay, my girlfriend tells me to be rough and forceful and swears a lot during stimulation, is this normal?

Everyone has different levels of what is acceptable during sexual contact. So long as you dont object to this sort of role playing then there should be no issue.
The only other concern would be if there was a history of abuse with your girlfriend and then perhaps she has issues that need to be dealt with by a professional. If not then it just comes down to her preferences.

Is it possible for a man to feel whether or not a woman is a virgin during penetration?

It all depends on the woman. Some women have a very thin hymen which "breaks" easily, has already been broken by active sports such as bike riding or horse riding or by the use of tampons. Some women have stronger hymens which create a barrier that needs to be stretched and pushed through which may be felt and can also bleed.

I cannot please my wife in vaginal sex at all. I have tried things like the Ice lube and even lots of foreplay before but I can only bring her to orgasm when I go down on her.

Keep using lubricants and really stimulate her clitoris before hand. There are several positions to try, the most popular for women to achieve orgasm is for her to be on top. When on top she can vary her position from being upright to being chest to chest.
Another option, still involves manual stimulation whilst penetrating. If you are behind her and also spooning and she lifts her top leg over your hip, you should be able to penetrate her and also stimulate her clitoris at the same time. Once she learns to orgasm during penetration it will be easier for her to in the future.

MALE ORGASM AND EJACULATION
We receive a lot of questions regarding men and ejaculation and orgasm. So will try and answer all questions in the response below

MULTIPLE ORGASM
With practise, men can experience multiple orgasm but not all will culminate in ejaculation, some will be non-ejaculatory.
DELAYED ORGASM
Delayed orgasm in men can be very frustrating and anxious occurance. Most men will usually last 2-4 minutes once full on thrusting is occuring. In mild or infrequent occurances, more stimulation and foreplay would be recommended to ensure that he is "on the verge" before penetration begins. If he is impatient for penetration, tease him with oral sex or a lap dance first.
If orgasm takes a little longer than usual, most womens natural lubrication will dry up and she will start to feel quite tender and sore. Always reapply some extra lubricant.
The stress and worry about not "performing" can really have an effect on a relationship. When delayed orgasm becomes a major barrier in both partners experiencing a fulfilling sex life it is time to seek the help of experts. See your GP who can recommend the most appropriate course of action for you.

I have a problem. I have sex regularly with my girlfriend and she says it feels great and fantastic and it looks as if she is climaxing (moaning, shaking legs etc) and she just suddenly stops her hard breathing, and relaxes, but she says she doesnt know if she orgasmed. If I continue to thrust it sometimes hurts her and on occasion she says that the feeling inside her gets so overpowering, not painful, that she needs me to stop. What is this? Am I making my girlfriend orgasm, or what is going on?

Firstly, it is great that you care so much about your girlfriends sexual experience. It is very difficult to answer as a climax can be a very different experience for different women.
Some women report a sensation of tingling in the spine, brain, and genital areas. They may feel waves of contractions and heat/cold. While some women can experience being on the verge of passing out or exploding, for others their experience is somewhat less than that of 'earth moving'. Sometimes a womans body will go completely rigid during orgasm and they may have muscle contractions not just in the pelvic regions. Some women also have the overpowering sensations you described where to continue to have sex boarders on painful and unpleasant.
It sounds as if she is experiencing her form of orgasm and if she is feeling satisfied and fulfilled then that is all that matters. Continue to be sensitive, caring and a considerate lover.

Is pre-cum a form of premature ejaculation? Is there anyway to stop the formation of pre-cum before sex? I only ask because extended periods of foreplay result in pre-cum and it is thus usually harder to get and maintain an erection. Please help!

Pre-cum may or may not contain sperm and is released during sexual arousal and appears to neutralize the acid from urine in the urethra and provides lubrication for sperm during ejaculation.
Just with anything to do with the human body there is a large range of what is considered normal. Some men form a small amount of pre-cum during arousal, whilst others ooze large amounts.
If pre-cum is effecting your ability to maintain or get an erection you should speak to your doctor. There are many treatments and techniques available now to assist you. Dont let it effect your sex life, get help now.

How do you give a hand job?

TIPS TO PLEASURE HIM
Using your fingertips, stroke up and down the shaft of his penis gently.
As his tension builds, use more and more of your hand ie. your palm and increase pressure slightly, depending on hardness.
Encircle his penis with your fingers and move up and down the shaft, when you reach the head of his penis use your palm to roll around the head of his penis applying pressure as required.
As with any sexual contact, you need to reduce the risk of transmitting STIs by using a condom. You can use saliva or water based lubricant to make it slippery and sensual for him.

1. I am 15 (male) and have attempted masturbation a number of times, but am never successful in having an orgasm, am I doing something wrong?

2. I am a 17yr old female and I still haven't orgasmed. My boyfriend says it's because I tell myself I won't orgasm but could it be the way he pleases me? I can get a good feeling for a little while but can't keep it and once it's gone I can't be bothered having sex. Even masturbating doesn't work? What could I do? What could he do to make me orgasm?

Both men and women can have difficulty reaching orgasm, although it's more common among women. For many people, becoming orgasmic takes practice. Masturbation helps people figure out what feels good and what helps them build tension toward orgasm.
Your thought patterns can influence your concentration. If you think "I'll never do this", or "I have work to do", this can work against you.
People masturbate in different ways to heighten the level of sexual arousal. Some prefer using their fingers and hands, with or without lubricant. Others masturbate with sex toys, fantasy, or erotic magazine or videos. In addition, touching other body parts at the same time can add another dimension to pleasure - some enjoy stimulating their nipples, anus, neck, arms and/or back - Try using Four Seasons Arouse or Four Seasons Ice Lubricant which can increase arousal.
If you're still unsuccessful, consider that certain medications, drugs or alcohol can interfere with orgasm. If after trying the above, orgasm still doesn't happen, you should see your health care provider.
While learning how to orgasm may take time, practice makes perfect. In the meantime, enjoy the trip.

Is anal sex painful?

With practice, anal sex may not hurt. With enough lubricant and enough patience, it's entirely possible to enjoy anal sex as a safe and fulfilling part of your sex life.
See other answers for advice on anal penetration.

I am almost 18 and when I was 15 my penis was straight, now that it has finished growing (I think) it has a slight but obvious curve to the left when erect. Is this normal? Can I fix it??

It is quite normal for men to have a slight or even prominent penis curve. Penises can curve left, right or in any number of directions and angles.
Sometimes the curve may be especially pronounced when it's erect. The development of the muscles in the base of the penis, connective tissue, and skin create certain unique shapes and curves that vary in men. Sometimes, the curve straightens out on it's own over time. Others may never be perfectly straight, and thats ok too.
Only if your erection is painful, has a severe bend, or causes discomfort during intercourse need you be concerned.

I'm a male of age 18 and don't find the taste that great when going down on my girlfriend. What can I do?

You can use a Four Seasons Ultra Sheer Dam. This is an ultra thin piece of latex that is specially designed to provide a barrier for use while performing oral sex.
when used properly Four Seasons Ultra Thin Dams are highly effective at reducing the risk of catching or spreading many STD's.

Are thinner condoms weaker than normal?

Four Seasons ultra thin condoms are made with a special latex formulation, to achieve first class strength and sensitivity.
All of our condoms including ultra thin must pass all of the ISO4074 tests, including tensile strength, air pressure and electronic current seepage test, so while they are thinner they are not necessarily weaker.
Among the main causes of condom breakage are the lack of lubrication, air trapped inside the condom or fitting too tight a condom, all of which are not related directly to condom wall strength.
Ultra thin condoms do require very good manufacturing knowledge to produce however, and are often more expensive.

I am able to have an orgasm when I masturbate but not when I have sex except for one time without using a condom (with my girlfriend). I have yet to achieve having an orgasm with condoms during sex. I have been using ultra thin condoms to hope that would help. Is there any advise or suggestions that you can give me so I can achieve an orgasm during sex? It would really help!!

Try to relax, it may be that you are pressuring yourself mentally to perform. Or that you are used to the sensations yuo feel from masturbating and having unprotected sex so that when you use a condom you have a different sensation.
Start with lots of foreplay so you are on the brink of penetration. Different positions will give you different sensations so find one that suits you best - normally you being on top - ie the missionary position. Try the Four Seasons Naked Condoms for an ultra thin condom and if you are uncircumcised make sure you pull back the foreskin before putting on the condom. Also a small drop of lubricant rubbed onto the head of your penis before putting on the condom may increase sensation.

I am 23 and still a virgin. My foreskin does not go back when I masturbate. If I try to pull it, it hurts. Will it be a problem when I will have sex for the first time. How should I use a condom? Shall I pull the foreskin back first and then use a condom?

Please see previous responses on tight foreskin.
If the foreskin is painful to retract you may experience pain/discomfort on thrusting and you will need to be very careful your first time to see if you will be affected.
Pulling the foreskin back when using a condom may heighten your sensations, but it really is up to you.

Im 17 and my foreskin is too tight to pull back. Is this a problem and how can I fix it?

Usually, after the age of 15 the foreskin can be pulled back gently to allow proper washing of the penis. If you cant do this you can try putting a little bit of lubricant on the foreskin and tip of penis and gently massage the foreskin back a little each day. Do not pull back if there is pain as you may split your foreskin.
If this doesnt work and you dont see a change in how far you can pull back the foreskin you may have Phimosis which is a common problem. You will need this diagnosed and treated by a doctor.

We get a lot of questions about penis size so please find below some info to answer any questions you may have

The AVERAGE length of an adult male's flaccid penis is 7.6cm to 11.4cm.
The AVERAGE length of an adult male's erect penis is 12cm to 18cm.
These are average sizes so there will also be men outside of these results who are still NORMAL.
The penis usually starts to grow during puberty from 9-16 years of age and will continue to grow for up to 4-6 years from the onset of puberty so in some cases a 22 year male's penis may still be growing.
For some men there is a marked difference in the size of their flaccid penis compared to their erect penis. For others the size of their flaccid penis is very similar to the size of their erect penis. Again this is all very normal and not indication of manliness.
Comparing penis size does not give any indication into a man's prowess in pleasing his partner. Its not the size that matters, its how you use it. Have faith in your tool and use it wisely.
As far as making your penis larger goes there are several options including pumps, surgery and medication. You really need to be careful of scams and potentially harmful remedies here and it is best to speak to your doctor to find out what is best for you. Rather than trying to make your penis larger, why not find ways to better please your partner and be a stud in the bedroom that way.

I was wondering how to get my girlfriend to really relax before sex?

Touch can be a powerful thing and even a 10 minute massage can do much to help her relax. Try giving her a massage using Four Seasons Massage Oil.
Start foreplay - ie kissing, touching, licking - then back off a bit - satrt again increase intensity - slow back down - before you know it, she will be begging you not to stop.

My girlfriend seems to be struggling to relax when I'm about to go downtown on her. She is self concious of how she tastes I think...
What ways are there for me to help her relax? I really want her to feel good.

This is quite a common reaction as oral sex for women is a very intimate experience. Why not start off by showering together, tasting her whilst you bathe her and then move it out of the shower. Talk to her as you move down her body and expressing your delight in the taste of her.

Please answer this question. I'm male (16) and I enjoy having my girlfriends toys in my anus. She really enjoys doing it. Is this normal? Or should I not like it?

You're certainly not alone in your discovery of rectal pleasure by stimulating the prostate gland and sensitive nerves around the anus - even if you didn't know thats what you were doing. When touched or massaged, the prostate - about half an inch inside the opening of the anus - is a spot in men's bodies that heightens sensations during intercourse and masturbation, including at the time of orgasm.
There are plenty of straight singles and couples alike who give and get anal stimulation in different ways, so it is completely normal.
If you both are having fun then go for it.

Sometimes after ejaculating my erection doesn't subside immediately, is there more chance of the condom breaking if I keep going or should I take it off and use another condom?

If the condom has been ejaculated into, even if it was only a very slight amount, it needs to be taken off. If there are plans to continue getting busy or to get busy later on, a new, unused condom should be put on. A good rule to follow may be "when in doubt, throw it out!"
There is also a chance that the semen will work its way down the condom and come into contact with the vagina.

My boyfriend and I recently began having sex using condoms. Soon after our third time he has developed a very itchy, splotchy rash on the inside of his thighs beside his scrotum. He told me that the same thing happened with his last girlfriend after sex. He does not have any rash on his penis but could this be a latex or spermicide allergy? It has lasted about three days now and finally seems to be fading. I feel really bad for him and needless to say it is killing our sex life!! Any help would be great.

Many people sometimes mistake symptoms such as a rash or infection in their genital area for latex sensitivity, when the condom is really just aggravating an independent problem. Finding out exactly what is causing your boyfriends rash or infection is the first step to treating it. Your boyfriend needs to get checked out by a health care professional.

My boyfriend was masturbating the other night and he ejaculated all over my vagina, all over my lips and the entrance...Can his sperm travel up inside my vagina? Can I get pregnant?

You are certainly at risk of pregnancy and catching an STI. Sperm can survive for several hours outside the vagina and then make their way inside. Pregnancy will depend on where you were up to in your menstrual cycle. You need to ensure you use protection to prevent pregnancy and STIs.

Is it ok to put on two condoms for extra protection in case the other one breaks?

We would not recommend the use of two condoms at the one time as this can cause friction which may weaken the material and increase the chance that the condoms might break. We would recommend the use of the Four Seasons Extra Strength condoms which will give you additional protection for sustained intercourse.

Does you Four Seasons Massage oil degrade the condoms or is it ok to use with sex as well?

The Four Seasons Massage Oil has ingredients that are not compatible with the latex in the condoms. Best to stick with a water based lubricant.

Sometimes after sex and masturbating I get red itchy spots under my foreskin that last for a couple of days. Could this be an sti? What should I do?

To prevent infection, uncircumsized men need to retract their foreskin and wash with soap and water everyday as this area is ripe for bacterial growth. Infection can easily develop under the foreskin if it isnt pulled back and washed regularly.
Use a lubricant to ensure that this isnt irritation due to friction. If you continue to be concerned dont hesitate to contact your GP or health care provider.

Is it proper for me to put my fingers into my girlfriend's vagina during sexual intercourse? If it is not, what is the side effect?

Whether or not it is proper, depends on you and your girlfriend's preferences - if she is ok with it - then go for it. Always ensure your hands are clean and your fingernails are short and smooth (no scratches please). If required use lubricant or ensure she is well aroused before penetration. You can insert more than one finger at a time and stimulate her clitoris with your thumb - just always remember to listen to her and stop if she says so.
If you mean to insert your fingers whilst your penis is inserted also, then again, listen to what she wants and always stop if she asks you to - otherwise go for it. The risks here are condom breakage and scratching - you would also have to be careful of the vaginal opening when thrusting if your finger tips come out. It may be more important in this case to use a Four Seasons Personal Lubricant.

Do women truly not care about penis size. I'm not all that big - it seems to me that an average or above average penis is better because your self confidence is better and not inclined to have as much of a hang up on the issue? Do they say "it doesn't matter" to pacify us?

Whilst it is true that not all men are created equal - the same goes for women too. Realistically, for some women size will be an issue but for most it will be a case of "it is not what you have but what you do with it that counts!"
In any relationship, acceptance and communication is key to ensuring success - ask her what she likes. Make sure you spend plenty of time on foreplay and other forms of intimate contact. Oral stimulation as well as massaging and stroking the genitals and breast will certainly go a long way to sexual fulfilment. Make her pleasure your priority and don't give up until she is satisfied.
The best thing you can do is have belief in yourself and your self worth. There are a lot of men out there who have large penises but are selfish lovers and leave their woman unfulfilled.

Can you get std/sti's on your balls when they touch the vagina? Is this possible or am I fully safe wearing a condom?

Most STIs are transmitted by bodily fluids such as blood or semen. There are some however that are not. You would be at risk of genital lice (crabs). Also genital herpes can occur in both male and female genital areas that are covered by a latex condom, as well as in areas that are not covered. Correct and consistent use of latex condoms can reduce the risk of genital herpes only when the infected area is protected. Since a condom may not cover all infected areas, such as the testicles, even correct and consistent use of latex condoms cannot guarantee protection from genital herpes.
Persons with herpes should abstain from sexual activity with uninfected partners when lesions or other symptoms of herpes are present. It is important to know that even if a person does not have any symptoms he or she can still infect sex partners.

I'm a male virgin and my partner is not. I'm concerned that when I have sex I won't be able to last long enough to please her because she is used to having sex often. What is the average time I should last before I ejaculate?

There is no clear cut answer to how long thrusting during intercourse might last. The thrusting can last anywhere from a few seconds to a few hours, with most sessions lasting somewhere in between.
Using a condom reduces the sensitivity of the penis, allowing thrusting to last longer.
Why not try having an orgasm yourself first - either by masturbation or by her pleasing you. You may then feel more relaxed and not so concerned about cumming too soon.
But, remember that it's not the amount of time the man is inside the woman that counts, but the quality of the total sexual experience for both partners.
Communication is the key, as well as feeling good about each other and yourselves.
My girlfriend has got genital herpes. Is it okay for us to have sex after the blisters have gone or am I never going to get laid again?

Two out of three people with herpes catch it from someone who shows no symptoms. Even when the blisters are gone, the virus is still in the body. You don’t need to abstain from sex, just be careful. Taking precautions like using condoms will minimise your risk of catching it.

My girlfriend complains sex is painful for her. What can I do to help her?

There are lots of different things you can do to help her. You should start by getting her to relax, one reason sex may be painful for her is because the muscles in her vagina are contracted. You have a bubble bath together, give her a massage, oral sex could also help her relax. Make sure she is fully aroused before trying to have sex with her. Talking to her and being open with each other is another thing that could get her to relax. Another reason why it may be painful for her could be the lack of natural lubrication in her vagina. If this is the case, use some lube and all should be well. If nothing seems to be working, a quick trip to the doctor could solve the problem for you.

If my partner has a cold sore and gives me a blowjob, can I get genital herpes?

Cold sores are extremely contagious and are most often caused by the Herpes Simplex virus type 1 (HSV-1). When oral herpes lesions and/or its contents come into direct contact with the genital area through oral-genital sex, genital herpes most likely will develop. It is also possible for her to pass on the virus when there are no sores present, so a good idea is to use a condom all the time.

Is it possible to get STIs through oral sex alone?

It is possible to get STIs through oral sex. This is why it is extremely important to use condoms when partaking in oral, anal and vaginal sex as STIs can be contracted through any of these activities.

I enjoy the thrill of having sex outdoors. What tips can you give me to live out my fantasy without getting caught?

Firstly, you need to make sure that while it might be outside, it shouldn’t be in plain view of people. If you are caught, there is a possibility that you could be arrested. Good places that are outdoors, but still secluded are national parks, sand dunes or in the car. To make it that little bit easier, wear easy access clothes like baggy pants, or a wrap around dress or skirt for the girl.

I’m pretty sure my girlfriend is faking orgasms. Why is she doing this, and how can I get her to stop and have one for real?

She is most likely doing it to spare your feelings. It’s probably because she is no where near, but still wants you to feel like a stud. Faking really doesn’t do her any favours, so you should at least feel flattered she cares enough about you to not want to hurt your feelings of masculinity. You should approach the topic carefully with her and don’t come across accusingly. Ask her to tell you what she likes, so you can figure out what pleasures her and go on from there.

I’ve got a new girlfriend and for some reason I’ve been really quick. What can I do to stop this from happening? It’s embarrassing.

You need to take some time out. Linger over foreplay, so she gets the most out of that before you get down to business. One idea is to use the Four Seasons Extra Strength Condom, as it is that little bit thicker and will enable you to hold off for that little bit longer.

My girlfriend hates giving me oral, how can I get her to do it?

You can’t “get her to do it”. If she doesn’t want to do it, then you really can’t force her. You could tell her how much you like it when she does and how much it turns you on watching her. You could also give it to her so then she might want to reciprocate. Don’t worry, she'll go down when she is good and ready.

My girlfriend never has an orgasm during sex. What’s a no fail way to go down on a girl?

Sorry, but there isn’t one. All girls are different, and its up to you to find out what your girlfriend likes and doesn’t like. Sometimes, it all comes down to a matter of being comfortable. Engage her in a bit of dirty talk, and find out what she wants you to do to her. As she gets more comfortable expressing herself, you’ll find her getting turned on more and more, until she can’t help but orgasm.

I find it a bit tricky to put on a condom easily, would it be easier to put lubrication on the inside of the condom? Would this increase slippage?

Lubrication would help it slip right on, but you only need a little dab, if you put on too much, the condom could fall off during sex. If you want an even easier way to put on a new condom, you should try Four Seasons Quickie On Condom, it super easy to use and goes on in no time at all.

Please answer this question for me. Are condoms you buy from machines in the bathroom safe? What I mean is, could they carry some sort of disease or STD or anything that can make me sick?

You won’t get any STIs from an unused, unopened condom, regardless if you buy it from a vending machine, pharmacy, supermarket or gas station. Although, if you do choose to buy condoms from a vending machine, check the use by date.

I always buy studded condoms for my girlfriend, are there any other condoms she might like that “enhances pleasure”?

There are heaps of Four Seasons products both you and your girlfriend will like. One product that is very popular with women is the vibrating condom, give it a try or browse through the product section of this website and take your pick!

I was wondering if it is possible to fracture or "break" my penis when it is erect. I have heard that it is possible and that it is painful. Can it be corrected, and will it go back to normal?

Even though there are no bones in your penis, it is possible to break it. It can occur when the penis is thrust against a harder, less flexible object. If the object is hard enough, and is hit with enough force the thick membrane surrounding the corpora cavernosa can tear, causing an audible cracking sound, an abrupt loss of erection, severe pain and bruising and a penis that is now bent to one side. Doesn’t sound like much fun. If this occurs you need to seek medical care immediately and you might have to undergo surgery to repair it. While it is extremely rare and you would have to be very unlucky for this to happen to you, just be careful where you thrust.

I was kicked in the balls yesterday at football training and it hurt HEAPS. One of my teammates said I could be sterile. I’m hoping that’s not true, please enlighten me!

Whether or not such a blow can cause sterility is dependent on the severity of the kick. Ordinarily, copping a kick would not cause sterility. However, if a bruise develops, and its very large and major bleeding occurs, then this is something that needs to be looked at by your doctor, as there is a remote possibility that you could be sterile.

During sex I finish very quick and I am only 22 years old, I dont know what to do about it, I have tried times pills but it didnt work for me, plz tell me what to do about this. thanks

We recommend Four Seasons Extra Strength condoms. They are thicker and will decrease sensitivity and should assist you.

Is masturbating wrong? I do it about 2 times a day and still have sex with my girlfriend 4 times a week. Im 35 and will it cause problems in future

Masturbating is a very normal part of life, its great practice. It will not cause problems in the future.

hello there. I want to know what is the normal range of width and length of an erect penis? I dont have self confidence during sex, always thinking about my size and others mostly I have seen in porns. I appreciate it.

The average length of a penis is around 12-18cm. The average circumference is around 10-12cm.
You shouldnt compare yourself to the ones you see in porn films as they always use men with above average size penises.

Why is it so hard to have anal sex with my girlfriend?

The decision to have anal sex is a very personal one and you should listen to your girlfriend and respect and understand her decision if she chooses not to.
If she chooses to try anal sex there are several tips that might help things along.
Use plenty of lubricant and take things very slowly to avoid causing her pain and also injury. Experiment with different positions, such as spooning and if she bears down access may be easier. There are also some muscle relaxant creams that may help and you could try an adult store to purchase these.
Four Seasons Condoms, when used properly are highly effective against pregnancy and will help to reduce the risk of transmission of HIV infection (AIDS) and many other sexually transmitted diseases and infections. Any use of Four Seasons Condoms for other than vaginal intercourse can increase the risk of damage to the condom.

If I have intercourse with my partner without a condom 3 days before/after her periods, is there any chance of her becoming pregnant?
Do all women who have unprotected sex get pregnant?

A woman is more likely to become pregnant in any particular month if she has unprotected intercourse during her most fertile period. This period usually starts about 3 days before ovulation and ends about 1-2 days after it. (10-18 days after the onset of menstruation).
As sperm can survive in the womb and fallopian tubes for three to four days and occasionally as long as a week it is very difficult to ensure that there is no sperm present when an egg is released. Further complicating matters is that some women have longer or shorter cycles than others so determining safe periods is very difficult, needs to be precise and has a high failure rate.
Whilst many factors have to line up to allow successful fertilization and conception, and not every unprotected sexual encounter will lead to pregnancy, if you truly want to avoid pregnancy then additional contraception is recommended.
A visit to a health care professional can help you and your partner to understand your individual fertile periods better and help you to manage your contraception, whether natural or assisted better.

Since I started puberty I have had small white studs around the base of the head of my penis. It doesn't look like fungus and it looks like it is part of the skin itself. Is this normal?

Firstly, I think it is great that you are aware of you body and any changes that you may see. I must say that I cannot make a diagnosis over the computer and strongly suggest that you consult a health care professional for diagnosis and treatment.
It is more likely that the small white studs are what is known as white papules which are common and harmless. You still need to get them checked to ensure that they are not genital warts or another STI.
Whilst you may feel embarrassed to talk to a health care professional, remember that they are professionals and your peace of mind means a lot.

My girlfriend thinks it is ok to have sex while she has her period. She says it wont cause any damage and that it's only classified as a "no go zone" because guys find it gross. Is this correct?

Your girlfriend is quite correct and it is fine to have sex during menstruation. Some women even find that orgasm can help to relieve cramps and that the menstrual blood adds lubrication.
In saying this however, it is important that you and your partner feel comfortable about the whole experience as sexual pleasure is a whole body experience taking into account sights, feel, smell and often taste.
If your girlfriend has a bath or shower immediately before sex and you put a thick towel underneath you this should minimise the mess created.
SPECIAL NOTE:
Blood is a good medium for certain infectious agents to grow in, and blood does transmit the HIV virus, so certainly those at risk should not have sex during a period - or ever have sex without a condom.

I am 18 and have a very small penis - 13cm long and quite fat. I only started to get pubic hair a year ago. Will my penis get any bigger?

Puberty is a very gradual process that usually starts from 9-16 years of age. Normally, your testicles will start to enlarge first and your final penis size is reached four to six years later. There is so much variation in the process of normal penis growth and many young men feel inadequate and that their penis is too small. The chances are that you are a late bloomer and have not finished growing yet.
According to independent research that Four Seasons Condoms has conducted amoung Australian consumers, the average size of an erect adult Australian penis is 12-18cm long (meaning that many penises are shorter and many are longer).
It is also very important to remember that penis size is not the only key to pleasing your partner. Communicating about what pleases you both, being considerate to your partners needs and spending time on their pleasure will go much further to achieving pleasure and orgasm than the size of your penis.

Is it true that women peak sexually at 30 and men at 18?

There were some studies done in the late 1940s and early 1950s which set the ideas about sexual peaks, especially in women. These reports were influenced by society's beliefs and constraints about sexuality and what was acceptable.
Everyone is different and therefore sexual peak and function varies between individuals. Today, most researches believe that sexual "peak" could occur at any time depending on a persons life experiences. Also as a persons circumstances change so may their interest in sex and sexual exploration.

Just wanting some information on using condoms in the shower or pool.

Having sex in different places can be exciting and stimulating, however there are several things to consider when using condoms in water.
Water in general will wash off any natural or applied lubrication which can cause more friction and increase the risk of the condom breaking. Also, as there is more friction due to less lubrication the skin could become grazed and open to allow the bacteria present in the water to infect the skin. Pool and spa water would not normally enter the vagina, so it is unwise to transmit this potentially bacteria laden water into the vagina.
Heat is not good for condoms either and can affect the integrity of the condom. As can chlorine or other additives in pool/spa water which can deteriorate the condom. You also run the risk of water getting inside the condom itself which can lead to the condom breaking.
We suggest foreplay in the pool and sex out of the pool.

I am very quick to ejaculate when masturbating but when I have sex, ejaculation takes much longer. Is this OK?

It would appear that you are quite aware and capable of pleasing yourself which is a good thing. Obviously, a vagina cannot grab your penis as strongly as your own hand nor will it instinctively know what feels best to you.
Changing your masturbation techniques may help you learn to respond to different stimuli so that you increase your own opportunities for enjoying sex with others. You may want to experiment using a looser grip or your other hand and trying not to worry about taking longer to ejaculate.

Even with a condom on, I still don't last long enough. When it is time for penetration, it always ends before I get started. I was told masturbating causes premature ejaculation...I've been masturbating since I can remember.

Many men occasionally ejaculate before they or their partner would like. If it happens infrequently or you are not worried by it, it's probably no cause for concern. You can try using the Four Seasons Extra Strength condom. The extra thickness may decrease sensitivity. There are also several products on the market that have a desensitizing effect.
However, if you regularly ejaculate too soon - such as before penetration or shortly afterward - you may have a condition known as premature ejaculation. Premature ejaculation is a common sexual occurance. Some experts think that it affects as many as one out of three men.
There is no evidence that masturbation causes premature ejaculation and it is now thought to be caused by a number of physical and/or psychological issues. In some men, premature ejaculation is related to erectile dysfunction.

I struggle to get an erection. I have sex regularly and have trouble getting an erection with my partner and on my own. My girl will have to give me head for about 10 minutes before we start having sex - I am only 18. Also, I can never get it up again that day no matter how keen I am.

Many guys have trouble getting or keeping an erection at some point in their lives. Many factors can contribute to this issue such as drug use, alcohol, performance anxiety, stress, fatigue etc. The more you focus and worry about it the worse it will become.
In saying that, it is also important that you speak to a health care professional to rule out physical causes. Physical causes for erectile dysfunction need to be treated not only for your physical wellbeing but also your emotional wellbeing. Don't be emabrrassed to seek advice and treatment from a qualified health care professional.

My girl and I have great sex. She let me give her anal sex, so I suggested that since she gave me her sensitive area, I should do the same. I have, and sex is great. But it hurts!

When having anal sex, pain is a signal that something is wrong. Anal play, including penetration, should never hurt. If you feel pain, you may have inserted something too large, or moved too quickly or vigorously. Always start small (fingertip) and then work your way up to more fingers or toys. Use tons and tons of lubricant; the anus is not self-lubricating and can tear easily. Finally, go very slowly and listen to your body. If it hurts, stop what you are doing right away.

I would like to ask you about my penis. I would like to be bigger. Somebody told me to use a pump to be big and one of my friends told me to try the pills. I think I would like to use pills because the pump is only for a moment. I really wanna be big like the guys in porno movies. What is the best way?

Consider this: The top 2/3 of the vagina has virtually no nerve endings, so stuffing it full of a 12 inch penis is not a guarantee of pleasure. Certain camera angles used in porn make the penis look bigger. The only way to permanently change the size of your penis is through surgery, which is expensive and carries some risks. I can't recommend taking pills due to potentially dangerous side effects and the fact that just taking a pill can't possibly change your anatomy permanently. Penis pumps do work to get a quick erection that's possibly bigger, but again, this is a temporary change. One fun thing to try is length extenders and girth enhancers, which will augment what you already have. Another tip, try shaving all your pubic hair off, it'll make you look 2 inches bigger.

I go down on my girlfriend all the time, she tells me she is done but I am not sure if it's just because she doesn't like it. How can I tell if a girl has an orgasm?

There is no way a man can tell if a woman has had an orgasm. A man can try to read her reliable climax signals, i.e. a specific breathing pattern, body movements, vocalizations, etc., if he's sure there's an orgasm attached to them. However, the chances of misreading these signs is high. Fluid release is not an orgasm indicator.
Your question, and this often unreliable detection method, point out the importance of sexual communication and trust. A woman can share whether or not she orgasmed, what it felt like, how her partner can help, and whether or not orgasm is even her goal. Thanks to a discussion like this (which her partner can initiate, too) lots of pleasures short of orgasm can also be identified.

When the boy pulls out before he cums is there such a thing as pre-cum that you can get pregnant from?

Yes there may be sperm present in pre-cum which can lead to pregnancy. If the boy has ejaculated recently, not all sperm may have been expelled, some can stay behind and be flushed out with pre-cum. Urinating after ejaculation can also help to flush out stray sperm - just remember it only takes one to conceive. If the boy withdraws and ejaculates outside the vagina and then reinserts his penis, sperm may still be present which can lead to pregnancy.
Just remember to always practise safe sex for protection against pregnancy and STIs. Not all STIs need fluids to be transmitted, some can also be transmitted by skin to skin contact. Therefore you really need the protection of a condom or dam during all sexual contact.

I am on birth control and my boyfriend keeps suggesting we don't use condoms, is that such a good idea?

When you say birth control, I will assume you mean the birth control pill. Obviously the pill only protects against pregnancy - and it's not 100% effective.
Using a condom as well (also not 100% effective) will decrease the chance of falling pregnant, especially if you forget to take a dose or are ill or are taking other medications such as antibiotics.
The big issue is protection against STI's. Are you monogomous? Is your partner? Have you both been tested for HIV or Hepatitis C?
Some STI's can change your life forever and you need to be certain that you protect yourself whilst considering your boyfriends feelings. Have a talk with him and discuss your options. If it is a new relationship perhaps take some time to see how it progresses.

Is it possible to break the condom during oral sex by my girlfriends teeth rubbing against it?

Whilst condoms are designed and tested to take the rigours of standard vaginal intercourse all care must be taken not to damage the condom when tearing open the condom foil. Extra care must also be used so that teeth, jewellery or finger nails don't damage the condom.
Sometimes, if the tip of the condom is not squeezed to expel air on application, trapped air can create a seal that makes the condom more susceptible to breakage/popping. It is also important to remember that condoms are one use only, after ejaculation, carefully withdraw the condom whilst the penis is still erect holding the rim to avoid leakage.

My girlfriend is a virgin and after talking, she thinks she is ready to have sex. Being her first time, are there any tips for how to make it an enjoyable experience for us both?

The key here is communication and patience, the fact that you have asked us shows that you care about your girlfriend and her feelings. Whilst we are sometimes shy about discussing our feelings or sexual desires, communicating what we like or don't like allows us to feel comfortable and in control. Take things slow with lots of foreplay - kissing, massage, manual stimulation - and if necessary use a water based lubricant for ease of penetration. If you cannot penetrate on the first attempt, pull back and try a bit more lube or stimulation and try again slowly. Whilst some female virgins feel discomfort or pain and bleeding on the first time, not all do and the level to which it effects your girlfriend will be unique to her. Listen to her and if she needs you to stop then STOP. Always use a condom and stay safe.

I have a dry patch of skin on the top of my penis which sometimes tears open and swells when I get an erection or after sex. I also have an itchy smooth patch on the lower part of my penis. What could this be?

We offer our responses for educational purposes only and are not qualified to give medical opinions or diagnosis. We would recommend that you see a doctor or sexual health physician for diagnosis and treatment. Any "wound" that is open has the risk of infection and also leaves you more vulnerable to contracting STIs. There is also a possibility that this is an STI and you may be passing it on to your partner if you are not using a condom. Don't be embarrassed, your health and peace of mind is much more important.

Are there any moves I can do to get my girl interested in anal sex or is there anything I can do in foreplay to stimulate her? Also once penetrated, is it ideal to stimulate the clitoris whilst having anal sex to increase pleasure and take her mind off the first uncomfortable moments of anal intercourse?

There is already another response on the website that may help you in this regard. I will also add that communication is key - talking about what you want and listening to her needs. She could try lying face down as this may help penetration but don't force penetration if she finds it too painful. Sometimes it may be better to start slowly. First time insert a well lubricated and well manicured finger into the anus. Moving around slowly to try and gently stretch the anus and stop once it is too painful. On the next occasion, try again and slowly build up her tolerance to the pain and sensation. Once you are both more comfortable with this, you can see if she would like clitoral stimulation also to enhance her enjoyment - again this will depend on the position you choose and her preferences.

My boyfriend and I love to have oral but we don't use a condom. Could I get a disease if we do anything? Is it bad to swallow? All my friends say that I'll get a stomach virus or something.

STI's can be transmitted during oral sex without a condom. If infected with HIV, then the HIV virus can be transmitted in the semen although the risk is lower than vaginal or anal sex. The Herpes virus and gonorrhoea can also be transmitted during oral sex without a condom and as they are often asymptomatic, it's hard to tell if you or your partner has an infection. As far as getting a stomach virus goes, I have done some research and have not been able to find any evidence of this happening.
If any doubt, always use a condom.

I've been steady with my girlfriend for a while now, we don't use a condom during sex because she is on the pill, we normally just don't have sex when she is on antibiotics or misses a dose. Is there anyway to catch an sti just randomly?

If you are monogamous and you are certain that your partner is also, then the chances of catching an STI randomly are very low.

Is it true that as soon as sperm hits the air it dies so no matter if its near the vagina you cannot get pregnant in any way?

Sorry but this is not the case. As sperm is ejaculated in semen it can survive up to a couple of hours outside the vagina depending on the environment, ie temperature, semen not drying out etc. Think of all the men who donate sperm or have their sperm tested, if their sperm died immediately it would be extremely difficult to do this.
If the sperm is ejaculated inside the vagina it can last 4-7 days.
If you are trying to avoid pregnancy and STI's you are best to use a condom.

Do you know of any condoms specifically for uncircumcised penises?

The Four Seasons Condoms can be used on circumcised or uncircumcised penises.
If you pull back the foreskin when putting on a condom you will maximise the free movement of the foreskin during sex, enhancing sensation. Just follow the instructions for use to ensure you have put the condom on correctly.

When hard, my foreskin is too tight at the tip for it to pull back, should I go under the knife or what should I do?

This condition is known as Phimosis. Phimosis can occur naturally or as a result of scarring due to infection or forceful retraction of the foreskin during bathing or sex.
Sometimes this tightness may cause pain during intercourse or get in the way of urination or cause infection. If this occurs there are several treatments that your GP can discuss with you.
With or without Phimosis, we encourage the use of condoms for all sexual contact to reduce the risk of pregnancy and STI's. Whilst pulling back the foreskin when putting on the condom can enhance sensation during sex, if your foreskin cannot be pulled back you can still roll the condom over the foreskin ensuring you squeeze out any bubbles in the tip. The Four Seasons Condoms may contain a small amount of lubrication on the inside of the condoms, if you feel you require a little bit more you can rub a few extra drops onto the foreskin - not too much or the condom may slip off.

Can penetration lead to sex, even if the male does not cum?

As penetration is sex (whether vaginal, anal or oral penetration), I think you mean 'can penetration lead to pregnancy, even if the male does not cum?'
This practise is actually called the "withdrawal method" of contraception and it has the highest failure rate of all contraception.
Even if the male has enough control to withdraw before orgasm, he may produce pre-cum which can contain sperm. This can be very risky. If the male withdraws and ejaculates outside the vagina and then reinserts his penis, sperm may still be present which can also lead to pregnancy.
It is also important to remember that not all STIs need fluids to be transmitted, some can also be transmitted by skin to skin contact. Therefore you really need the protection of a condom or dam during all sexual contact.

Why is it that when I have sex my erection wont go away for hours?

It is quite unusual for an erection to last for hours after orgasm. If you are taking a stimulant, such as Viagra this can happen - you need to see your doctor though if your erection lasts for more than 4 hours with a stimulant.
If you are concerned, please speak to a sexual health professional.

Everytime I masturbate my back hurts and I feel weaker and lazy - why is this? I am 18 years old.

You did not say if you are male or female or how often you are masturbating so it is hard to pinpoint what the issue is. The following points may apply to you. If you are concerned at all, you should seek medical advice.
* Masturbation, like any other physical activity, can be tiring. Your heart rate and blood pressure increases, your breathing quickens as you release endorphins into your blood stream which can cause you to feel flushed, giddy, warm or sleepy.
* Your pain may be due to muscle spasms or cramps. Many people during masturbation or sex will tense up the muscles in their body. If the muscles are held rigid they may start to cramp up or to spasm, which can be quite painful. If this is the case relax the tense muscles. Make sure your back is supported properly.
* A normal part of sexual arousal is for the genitals to become flushed with blood. If sexual arousal is prolonged and orgasm does not occur within a reasonable amount of time there may be some congestion or pressure.

I'm 14 now, if I have sex with my girlfriend are there any problems?

The big questions to ask yourself are:
* Will I always use protection of a condom against pregnancy and STIs.
* Are you aware that no contraception is 100% effective - are you and your girlfriend prepared to accept the consequences of a broken condom - ie pregnancy or STI.
* Are you and your girlfriend ready to deal with the emotional aspects of having sex. Do you have the same expectations and emotions about sex.
* Will there be any negative outcomes for waiting as opposed to not waiting.
You and your girlfriend will need to make this decision together. You may want to read some of the other questions on "losing your virginity" and how to make the experience pleasurable and memorable for you both.
It is also important to know that in NSW, VIC, ACT, NT and WA the Age of Consent for homosexual and heterosexual sex is 16 years. In SA and TAS it is 17 and QLD have a discriminatory Age of Consent.
"An age of consent is designed to protect young and innocent children from physical and psycological harm caused by engaging in sexual intercourse before he or she is mature enough to consent to such activity." (www.parliament.nsw.gov.au)
Obviously, some peaple mature earlier than others and you are a couple of years under the age of consent. If your girlfriend is over 16, there could be some legal issues.

My boyfriend enjoys anal sex and because it's excrutiatingly painful otherwise, we always use heaps of lube. However, the lube has the same feel and consistency as laxative which is inserted up the anus, and after anal sex I usually rush off to the toilets and stay there for hours for the terrible diarrhoea-like feelings to subside. It really ruins the experience and I have a lot of resentment towards him on my part because of this. Is there a practical solution??

Ingredients in the lubricants can also be found in the anal laxatives you mentioned and may in some people have a similar laxative effect. If your bowels are not emptied prior to anal sex, you may experience an after flow of "loose stools" or " diarrhoea like feelings" which some people find a pleasurable experience and some, such as yourself, do not. You can try using the lube prior to anal sex to empty your bowels. Also anal foreplay (massaging the anus) can help turn the 'unpleasant after feelings' into those you enjoy more.
Your response to anal sex is not uncommon. For some people, finding anal sex pleasant is a learned response which takes patience and understanding from your partner. Obviously, this build up of resentmaent will affect your relationship in the long term and you need to be honest about your feelings with your partner and decide whether it is right for you.

What is the best way to give a head job?

The most important thing is to be relaxed and comfortable. Kneeling on the floor or bed will put you in a great position to access all areas. Cleanliness can be an issue for him and her, so if concerned, why not start off with a sexy shower first. There is no need to dive straight in, start off with some caressing, licking and nibbling of the chest and nipples, slowly move down over the stomach and tease your way around the inner thigh and genital area. Then proceed as below.
Communication is very important. Tell each other what you like, don't like or where to touch, lick or suck.

TIPS TO PLEASE HIM

Using your tongue, lick up and down the shaft of his penis gently but firmly concentrating on some of his more sensitive parts. The extra sensitive areas are the glans (the dark pink tissue, full of nerve endings), the rim of the head of the penis and the frenulum (where the foreskin attaches to the penis).
Once you are ready to take his penis fully into your mouth, ensure that you cover your teeth with your lips so that you don't accidentally bite him. Use your thumb and fingers to make a ring around the base of his penis to allow you greater control over depth of penetration, speed etc. Using bursts of suction, move your mouth up and down and left to right over his penis whilst holding the base with your fingers.
As with any sexual contact, you need to reduce the risk of transmitting STIs by using a condom. You can use saliva or water based lubricant to make it slippery and sensual for him.
If you don't use a condom, you will need to decide before he cums if you swallow his semen. If you are happy for him to cum in your mouth and you choose not to swallow, make sure you have some tissues handy that you can spit into. If you don't want him to cum in your mouth, pull away when he is close to cumming and continue rubbing with your hand, cheek or even breasts until he reaches orgasm.

TIPS TO PLEASE HER

The clitoris is undoubtedly the most sensitive part of a woman's body. It can be a little tricky to locate as it can be hidden between the top of the vaginal lips (labia). When you find it though, you should be able to tell by her reaction. Her clitoris will need much more stimulation than a penis to achieve orgasm. For some women, the clitoris may be very sensitive and light pressure is all that is required, again listen to her and look for her reactions.
Once she is sufficiently aroused, start using your lips to kiss and suck around the clitoris and genital area. Vary your tongue movements from light, swirling around the bud of the clitoris to gentle, firm sucking. You can flick your tongue over the clitoris in a steady rhythm and insert your tongue in the vagina.
As with any sexual contact, you need to reduce the risks of transmitting STIs by using a barrier such as a dam.

The action of cuming in a girls mouth - has it always been around. Do girls like that or is it simply a matter of pleasing and imitating porn movies? Is there any reason why people would do that? I (male) would like to try that but I am pretty sure my partner wont agree to that, since it sounds and seems disgusting for her and with time, for me as well.

We have been able to find very little about oral sex throughout history. It seems that oral stimulation was used in the early 20th Century more as foreplay rather than a sexual act in itself. Its popularity grew around the sexual revolution of the 70's as a way to have sexual pleasure without the risk of pregnancy.
As far as cuming in another person's mouth goes, this is a very personal question that only you and your partner can answer based on what your preferences, likes and dislikes are. Talk with your partner about what you would like and gauge their reaction to trying it. Perhaps look at the Oral Sex For Him and Her section on our website together which may help you to make a decision.

Is all cum supposed to be white or can it be slightly green or yellow? What is normal?

Normally cum is white or cloudy white and may have a slightly yellowish tinge. Some food ingredients can affect the colour or cum temporarily. Cum that appears greenish/yellowish for a length of time may indicate an infection and you are best to see your GP as soon as possible for diagnosis and treatment.

My partner has syphillis, what risk am I - would I already have it?

If you have had unprotected sexual contact with a person who has any STI, then you are at risk of contracting the STI yourself. You should see your doctor for a blood test which will determine if you have contracted Syphilis.
Whilst Syphilis is transmitted through contact with a person who has Syphilis Sores (chancre), the sores cannot always be seen and many people experience no symptoms for many years.

There are 3 stages of Syphilis.

1. Primary Stage - Usually a single sore will appear - it is usually firm, round, small and painless. This sore will usually heal without treatment in 3-6 weeks. If adequate treatment is not received though, the infection progresses to the Secondary stage. From the time of contracting Syphilis it may take 10-90 days for the first sign of symptoms to appear.

2. Secondary Stage - Typically starts with a rash on one or more parts of the body that may not be itchy. The rash can appear as rough reddish or brownish spots on the palms of the hands or soles of the feet. Sometimes the rash can appear on other parts of the body and be very faint and unnoticeable. Other symptoms can include fever, swollen lymph glands, sore throat, patchy hair loss, headaches, weight loss, muscle aches and fatigue which makes it easy to confuse with other diseases. These symptoms will often disappear without treatment, but without treatment the disease will progress to the next stage.

3. Late Stage - This stage begins when secondary symptoms disappear. Without treatment, the infected person will continue to have syphilis even though there are no symptoms. The risks with this stage of Syphilis, is damage the internal organs, including the brain, nerves, eyes, heart, blood vessels, liver, bones and joints. This internal damage may show up many years later. Signs and paralysis, numbness, gradual blindness and dementia. This damage may be serious enough to cause death.

I'm 15 years old and I don't think my penis is growing. Is it because I'm a fat person or what? Also how can I increase my penis size without tablets or machines?

You may want to go back and have a look at some previous Q & A's on this topic as we may have already answered this for you.
Puberty is a very gradual process that usually starts from 9-16 years of age. Normally, your testicles will start to enlarge first and your final penis size is reached four to six years later. There is so much variation in the process of normal penis growth and many young men feel inadequate and that their penis is too small. The chances are that you are a late bloomer and have not finished growing yet.
Although losing weight won't increase the size of your penis, it can provide the genitals with space and prominence. A reduction of fatty tissue around the abdomen and thighs may very well make your penis and scrotum look bigger to you and to others.
The only way to permanently change the size of your penis is through surgery, which is expensive and carries some risks and at your age is not recommended. Remember too that it is not only the size of your penis that will effect how you please your future partners but the attention and techniques you use to satisfy them.

I know this may be a somewhat strange question. On all your condom packets it suggests using lubricant. Is this a necessity, will it be very painful if a water-based lube is not used (just partner's natural lubrication)? Obviously, penetration would not even be attempted util partner is highly aroused.

It is up to you and your partner to decide whether more than just the natural lubrication is needed. If penetration is painful for your partner then maybe try some more foreplay to increase natural lubrication otherwise you will need to use artificial lubrication to make penetration easier and pain-free.
It probably wouldn't hurt to make sure you're well hydrated before sex, and spending plenty of time on foreplay is a great way to start things off.
There's nothing wrong with increasing slipperiness with artificial lube. Water-based lube is best: oil based lubes are another option but are not safe for use with condoms. Add a drop of water-based lube on the inside of a condom to increase pleasure for the penis. (Too much here can cause the condom to slip off, so save the liberal applications for outside the condom.)

My boyfriend has a bit of a problem keeping it up; what do you suggest I do? Please help!

Almost all men have had one or more experiences when they wanted an erection and didn't get one, or lost one at a critical moment. Causes of inconsistent erections can be physical, psychological, or a combination of the two.
You need to determine whether this problem is physical or mental. If he has erections when he wakes up or through masturbation, that's important information that says his body is working correctly and that maybe more foreplay is needed before and throughout intercourse to maintain his erection.
Some possible physiological causes for problems with erections include alcohol use, diabetes, kidney disease, neurological disease, lack of sleep, or vascular diseases, such as hypertension, high cholesterol, or atherosclerosis. Other physical causes include hormonal imbalance or side effects of medications.
Psychological causes include stress, anxiety, guilt, depression, low self-esteem, and pressure from a new or "demanding" partner, or any pressure a man might be placing on himself.
Some men have problems keeping erections at the beginning of a relationship. Then, after they become more comfortable with their new partners, their erections become more reliable.
If the problem becomes chronic, there are a lot of products on the market that can help. For the best option for your partner, seek assistance from a health care professional.

Is it possible to get an STI if you have not had sex before? When I was a virgin I occasionally got large pimple like lumps on the skin just above my penis, since I have had sex with my girlfriend she has told me that she now has a lump near her clitoris. We were both virgins before we had sex so we haven't had sex with any one else and she also told me that she had a lump before a few years ago.

Even if you have never had vaginal or anal intercourse, it is possible to contract an STI through oral sex or skin-to-skin contact of the genitals.
What you have may be warts (caused by a different type of the virus) little pimples, or simply small growths that are part of your anatomy. If they are not irritated and have not changed in size or shape, there is likely nothing to worry about.
To be sure, get checked out by a health care professional and always use protection for future sexual contact.

My boyfriend doesn't stay erect long enough to have sex, when we try to have sex he goes soft again. We have been to the doctors twice now. What can we do?

There is probably not much more we could say that your doctor has not already told you.
Many guys have trouble getting or keeping an erection at some point in their lives. Many factors can contribute to this issue such as drug use, alcohol, performance anxiety, stress, fatigue etc. The more you focus and worry about it the worse it will become.
Have a read through previous responses for practical tips.

 

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Advice is of a general nature, for specific advice consult a health care professional.